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A new life

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by Proudmomma, Oct 3, 2015.

  1. Proudmomma

    Proudmomma Active Contributor

    I started using heroin at the age of 14 years old, 2 weeks before my 15th bday. When I first got introduced to heroin I didn't know anything about it. To me withdrawl was something you did when you took money out of the bank. So when I got sick for the first time I thought I was going to die. Then the next morning my cousin and her friend gave me a line and I was all better. That was the beginning of the end. I went on to keep snorting for about 4-5 years or so then the Crack came into play. It was all well and good until I didn't have mommy to support me anymore. That's when I turned to men to support my habit. I found out how easy it was to make $100 in 15 minutes. So I thought I was set. Then I shot up for the first time. I never went back to snorting. So fast forward to about 12 & a 1/2 years into my long addiction, at this point I had no hope of ever getting clean, i weighed a horrid 77 pounds and kept getting skinnier. I was a 26 y/o heroin/Crack addict that was shooting up right where there were open holes from abscesses that I just popped myself. Then after months of pain from the horrible blood infection in my arms, I ended up in the hospital because of the infection in my arms.They kept me over night and of course I signed myself out. Then a couple months after that, I found out I was pregnant with my first child. Scared, high, broke, well as broke as a junkie can be. Meaning of course I had money for drugs but no money to raise a child. It took me a couple weeks and my father kicking my bedroom door open for me to go get help. But I unwillingly went. Ya know, it was the best thing that ever happened to me. When they admitted me to the hospital and ran all my blood work, they said the infection in my arms was so bad that if I wouldn't have went in to get help when I did, with in a week I would've lost both my arms or the infection would've traveled more, which it had already started to do, to my heart and eventually would've killed my unborn Child and myself. That's when I made a life changing decision. That I was gonna get clean and stay that way. And I have. It has been 5 years since I last did any drugs. August 28, 2010 was my first day drug free. And my life has improved in ways I could've never dreamt possible while on drugs. I'm clean and I'm now the mother of 2 amazing little boys! They are my world and they are what keeps me clean everyday. I have a 4 year old and a 2 month old and I couldn't be happier. So a word of advice from a 13 year drug addict who has been clean for a little over 5 years, just do it. Say **** it and go for it. Yes, it's gonna hurt, you're gonna get sick as a dog , you're gonna want that quick fix to make you feel better. But DO NOT DO IT. That quick fix isnt worth your life. You might not think so but your life is a precious gift that you should cherish every single time you open your eyes in the morning. So ppl arent so lucky to wake up in the morning but you are. You're still here and if you're still using, let me say this, hunny, if I can stop so can you. I have faith in every addict. You can do it and stay that way! I have the ut most faith that you can get clean and stay clean. I'm proud of all of my fellow recovering addicts. Enjoy life, because it doesn't last forever. Best of luck to you all! With love, proud momma (V.S)
    kgord likes this.
  2. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Hello there @Proudmomma! Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing your story to us here. Well, it looks like you have been through a lot of stuff in life. And I am really happy to know that you have finally changed your ways for the better and is defintely back on track now. This would serve as an inspiration to a lot of people. All the best! :)
    Proudmomma likes this.
  3. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    Wow what an amazing story. Thank you for being able to share it with us. You are such an inspiration and your story will certainly inspire others to get t the help they need. God bless you and your little boys.
    Proudmomma likes this.
  4. dechantajones

    dechantajones Active Contributor

    Good for You! You sacrificed and kicked the habit for your child and I have to commend you. There are so many addicts that continue to use and their kids are suffering so bad because of it. I'm so glad you made a positive change in your life. You are a role model and proof that anyone can do it!
    Proudmomma likes this.
  5. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    @Proudmomma ...Hello and thank you for the courage and willingness to share your story in this forum. All I can say is congratulations for seeing the light after those darkest days in your life. You had a very inspiring life story which everybody who is into any kind of addiction right now can relate themselves to your journey in recovery. Like what you had said.. Enjoy life!...It is not forever that you will struggle for your mistakes in life. There will always be brighter days in your life!
    Proudmomma likes this.
  6. Proudmomma

    Proudmomma Active Contributor

    Thank you very much. The reason I joined this is because even though I've been in recovery for 5 years, I still need some kind words every now and again but the main reason is because I want to let people still suffering know that anythings possible. I am a certified behavioral health technician and honestly I wouldn't be able to do if it weren't for my past. I don't think I would've wanted to go to school for that if it werent for my past. Because i wouldn't have fully understood addiction. It may sound crazy but I regret nothing from my past because without my past I have no present and without my present I have no future. So thank you very much, your kind words are greatly appreciated.
    dechantajones and L_B like this.
  7. Proudmomma

    Proudmomma Active Contributor

    Thank you very much. I will never hesitate to share my story with anyone of I think it will help them get to where I am in life. I've come so far and there's very little that I want except for my boys to grow up right and for my story to help people still struggling. I know it's extremely hard to get and say clean. Even after 5 years I still struggle with the occasional thought. But ivory to tell people, you have to truly truly want to be clean. Theres so much more that I didn't have time to write earlier but if questions are ever asked about my past, I'll never hesitate to answer them, in hopes of helping others. Thanks so much again.
    L_B likes this.
  8. Proudmomma

    Proudmomma Active Contributor

    Thank you,I had to. I saw how my cousin getting high screwed up her kids and how much they despise her now for her never being there. I refuse to ever get high again. I refuse to ever let my kids see me nodding our with my head between my legs or skitzing so bad I'm stuck in a corner. Uhuh, not worth losing my babies over. Thank you for your words. That was very sweet of you to say.
    L_B likes this.
  9. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    So true that it is possible to become clean as others like you have done it. It is always nice to know or read success stories like this. It can serve as inspiration and motivation who are also wanting to be clean or currently struggling with addiction and thinking that there is no hope.
    Proudmomma likes this.
  10. Proudmomma

    Proudmomma Active Contributor

    I want to say thank you to everyone who has responded to my story by saying that I'm an inspiration and what not. So from the bottom of my heart, I thank you all for your kind sincere words. They are greatly appreciated! With love, proud momma (vienna)
  11. BayouBilly

    BayouBilly Member

    Five years sober is an amazing feat. You truly are blessed to have been able to fight this battle for your family. Most parents who have substance abuse issues tend to let it affect them to the grave. I am very proud of Proudmomma - your story definitely choked me up!
  12. Proudmomma

    Proudmomma Active Contributor

    Thank you @BayouBilly. It hasn't been east but I've done and plan on having many more years of sobriety to celebrate. I want to make my children proud of me. I mean theyre only 4 and 2 montgs old but one day I plan on opening up to them so they know enough about drugs to not ever do them. Again thank you so much for your sweet kind words.
  13. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    Proudmomma, I am happy to be in the company of someone like yourself. Yours is the kind of story I would love to share with others who are struggling and might be feeling hopeless. I know I speak for all here when I say we are truly proud of you.

    Best wishes to you and little ones and a hearty welcome to the forum.
    Proudmomma likes this.
  14. Proudmomma

    Proudmomma Active Contributor

    @Winterybella, thank you for such a sweet warm welcome. I have friends to talk to about what's going on or what went on in my addiction but they all seem to have their own stuff going on, so i usully jus keep any feelings that have to do with my former addiction/recover to myself. Im on here in hopes of helping someone who is just like I used to be by sharing my story. I've had ups and downs, no relapses luckily, but it doesn't mean it's easier because I've never relapsed or something like that. Anyway, I have to get my oldest babe to bed so thank you and I hope we can strike up a conversation on here one day soon. Good night!
  15. SunnySkies

    SunnySkies Active Contributor

    Welcome to the community here at this forum, and congratulations on beating your habit! You're an inspiration to others wanting or trying to kick the habit. It takes courage and determination to kick the habit and share your story. I wish you well in your future endeavors.
    Proudmomma likes this.
  16. Proudmomma

    Proudmomma Active Contributor

    Thank you very much. I tell my story in hopes that it will help someone, anyone. If my story helps even just 1 person that my struggles for 13 years weren't for nothing. Because if it helps someone then I'm happy! Thank you again!
    SunnySkies likes this.
  17. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    @Proudmomma ...You are always welcome for your great confidence within yourself. Just remember that in our life journey it is not always a rough road that we are travelling there are still smooth roads that we can pass by along the way. That is why never give up or lose hope for yourself and always be an inspiration to others.
    Proudmomma likes this.
  18. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @Proudmomma... Thank you so much for sharing your inspirational story. And congratulations on your five years of sobriety. That is such an awesome accomplishment. Your kids are lucky to have a momma like you. :)

    I'm sure your story will help many others. I wish you nothing but continued success on your amazing journey.

    Peace and hugs to you.
    Proudmomma likes this.
  19. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    I know how that goes. Often I feel like that friend who has a lot going on and I believe it might have stopped a few with issues to reaching out to me as well. One told me recently that I don't seem to have any time with him but truth of the matter is that I do have a lot going on and what's more he doesn't seem to want to change his lifestyle. At least with you, you sought change so I'd hope people would be there for you.

    Just know that if your friends are too caught in with their stuff, there will always be someone here in this community to listen and often offer great advice.
    Proudmomma and deanokat like this.
  20. doatk22

    doatk22 Community Champion

    I'm so glad you got clean and can take care of your kids. This testimony makes me so happy. What about your cousin who gave you the drugs are they hooked? Anyway, keep pressing forward. God bless you.
    Proudmomma and deanokat like this.