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After many years of staying sober...

Discussion in 'Sobriety Tips and Inspiration' started by amethyst, Dec 27, 2014.

  1. amethyst

    amethyst Community Champion

    I haven't had a drink for almost 21 years now, and I am proud of it. I haven't touched any cigarettes for nearly 4 years, and I am proud of that, too. But, I have to admit, that I have come close to reaching for a glass of whiskey and a cigarette a few times over the years, especially when I was dealing with major personal problems in my life. But each time I went to a bar, and all the alcohol in the world was at close reach, a voice inside me told me to go home, drink a cup of chamomile tea and deal with the difficulties in the morning. It always worked.
    I wonder why I couldn't hear that voice earlier, and why it took me years to overcome my addictions. I guess I wasn't ready to hear and accept it before.
    For you, who have been sober and clean for a while now, how are you dealing with temptations and urges to reach for the substance again when life gets challenging?
  2. megankl

    megankl Active Contributor

    I have been sober for 12 years now. To deal with temptations I surround myself with people who will not influence those habits. They know what is best for me and care about me. If I am not around alcohol then I don't really think about it and don't consider it much. Let's just say that I am thankful for an amazing support system. Congrats on your 21 years :)
  3. Charli

    Charli Community Champion

    Thanks for sharing your story, and congratulations on your achievement. I personally haven't beat my cigarette addiction yet but I am getting there. I just try as much as possible to be as self aware as I can be at all times, especially when I'm feeling the urge to reach for a cigarette. Back when I was just a teenager I didn't have to care as much but now that I'm older I know I have to be much more careful. Whenever I feel the temptation I just remind myself that I would like to grow old without having trouble breathing and I'd like to be able to be more active with the kids in my family instead of being tired or out of breath all the time.
  4. amethyst

    amethyst Community Champion

    Good friends and family are absolutely invaluable at the best of times, but when it comes to supporting someone who is addicted to a substance and struggling, there are often no words to explain how much they really help.
    I was fortunate to meet a very unusual person during my worst challenges with alcohol, and I know that without him I wouldn't have made it.
    Let's always cherish the people and the influences that come through people that were available to us when we most needed them.
  5. amethyst

    amethyst Community Champion

    Thank you, Charli. I know you will get there soon. Being aware of the ill effects on your health and that of your family is already half way to quitting. Also, as we get older, we take longer and longer to recover from substances that aren't good for us. Keep up the good work, and you won't believe how much better you'll feel once are finally free of the smokes. :)
  6. LitoLawless

    LitoLawless Senior Contributor

    Thank you so much for sharing this. I always lean towards meditation and reflection when I am struggling with addictions and losing myself. I think it's best to just relax (as hard as that may be) and not get lost in your emotions. It's always best to look inward, and try to identify what is giving you the urge to act out.
  7. karmaskeeper

    karmaskeeper Community Champion

    I just think about all the pain that me, and my addiction caused. I'm doing my best to make up for some of it. I hurt my children the most. I didn't beat them,or anything I was just a drunk. I did love them, and tried to be a good mother inspite of booze. I worked, and provided the best I could. That doesn't make up for the hurt. I think of my babies, and how I never ever want to hurt them that way again. I will put a bullet in my head first it would be easier, and less painful for all of us. Hell is here on earth if we unleash it. I'm over 4 years strong now I have 4 grown kids that amaze me still. The gleam in my eye the smile on my face the strength in my heart is by gods grace.
    RoseK likes this.
  8. danzig

    danzig Member

    That is a very inspirational story and makes me very glad to hear it. Of course you ask yourself why it took so long, but the most important thing is that you did it. Asking those questions are not productive and judging from your post I think you learned that first hand. I congratulate you on your sobriety and wish you continued success in the future.
  9. RoseK

    RoseK Active Contributor

    I agree with you completely! I was there once as well. I lost a lot of time when they were little just because I wanted to drink and "socialize." But, looking back, I am grateful for those experiences because even though I lost them I still have the ability to form new relationships with them. All is not lost :) I keep telling myself, "I am not the sum of my past experiences or mistakes. Every day I become new again."
    karmaskeeper likes this.
  10. d4rk3n

    d4rk3n Active Contributor

    You sir, are a strong person.
    It takes courage to stay sober and resist the temptations even in the worst times.
    It's always helpful to remember that no matter how bad things are, there is still some good left in your life, it may be your parents, your wife, your kids, etc.
    Go and share your grieves with them. It will help better than drinking or smoking.
  11. missbishi

    missbishi Community Champion

    Well done on 21 years of sobriety! What an achievement! I still get tempted myself but I am lucky to have friends who remind me just how far I have come and remind me not to undo all the hard work on a whim. A dcent support network is so important.
  12. karmaskeeper

    karmaskeeper Community Champion

    That is an excellent way to live. I think once I forgave myself it all became a little easier. I'm glad life is better for you now. It's never to late to try, and make a fresh start with those we have wronged.
  13. RoseK

    RoseK Active Contributor

    It's a long hard road for sure. Not for the faint of heart :) Best suited for those who are stubborn, honest with themselves and willing to keep going.
  14. musicmonster

    musicmonster Senior Contributor

    I simply meditate. That has been kept me sober and really just healthy for the longest time now. I highly recommend it. I also really make an effort of not worrying at all. It is a lot of work sometimes, but during those times, I pause and breathe and stop worrying. That also has made me sober all this time.
  15. ProShell

    ProShell Member

    Staying clean for almost as long as I've been alive is a real accomplishment, and there's no denying that.

    You've got a lot of experience with this, and hopefully hearing your story is going to be enough to spur some people into another direction
  16. missbishi

    missbishi Community Champion

    I agree that you won't hear your own internal "voice of reason" until you are ready to listen to it and can admit that you should. I don't think certain urges ever go away, I still get the odd cocaine pang every now and then, even though I haven't touched it for 8 years. My own voice of reason often kicks in, telling me not to throw away my hard work. Congratulations on 21 years of sobriety by the way - that rocks!
  17. muthoni

    muthoni Active Contributor

    I have been clean for more than ten years now. The thing that keeps me from taking that drink is remembering incidences that happened when I was drunk. I remember going home in a public bus and stating an argument with another passenger. I insulted him and I can still remember some of the words I used. Alcohol will never touch my lips for as long as I live.
  18. KNH

    KNH Active Contributor

    Your story is very inspirational, thank you very much for sharing! I feel that the "voice" will come once an addict is ready to hear it. True friends, courage, and other types of fun are just a few things that can prevent a relapse.
  19. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    I have no story to offer here. I came here as I have been doing for the last few days to find a story to lift my spirit and the spirit of those who might need it. I came to read of someone's triumphs and I found what I was looking for. It was truly inspiring to read of your journey. As someone earlier said, your are a person of great strength.
  20. adfnio

    adfnio Community Champion

    I feel challenged when I am confronted with places and people that are part of the problem. If they are places serving alcohol, then it's best to stay away. If they are people that drink and you know they are going to ask you to drink, then stay away. Full your life with good people and posititve activivites.