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Am I ready?

Discussion in 'Sobriety Tips and Inspiration' started by True concern, Nov 27, 2018.

  1. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    So nearly a full year of digging, thinking,trying,and reflecting.Allthis time was for a reason, to once again step out into the real world,responsible, rational, understanding, and reasonable. All this time and today I said "Fuc*It what's the worst that could happen?"As I entered the building for a low level job interview just to take it slow as I have been in recovery in some form or another for roughly a year I expected to hear"Sorry you're not what we are looking for"I thought if I heard this that's as bad as it could get right?Wrong!!What I heard was "You are exactly what we are looking for,what about instead of entry level you work directly under management as the second key holder and be responsible for making bank deposits and balancing the cash drawers at night after your shift ends and you send YOU'RE crew home?"Sh*t!!!!My anxiety spiked but I remained calm and apparently they didn't pick up on my uncertainty. I am not a thief so that's not an issue however I am still working on figuring me out....Yes even a year later and all of a sudden I can go back to work as if I never skipped a beat. This may sound terrific to some but it sounds very stressful to me and ya I get it life is stressful and I can't stop thinking honestly how many more chances could I possibly get or even deserve?

    The road I've traveled has been dark with many bumps in the way,the choices I've made in the past are poor at best,there was a time I hated nothing more than my own reflection, despised nothing more than the memory I had left behind as I drank away my emotions and my family, today though i am anxious i fear no mirror,I despise no memory,and I embrace all emotion,today I am reborn,full of hope and dreams to big to see,i will achieve, I will fight,i will overcome.

    Stay Strong My Friend's Life Is Full Of Twist And Turns But Never Give Up,Never Stop Fighting,Never Stop Trying.Acknowldge Your Demon's So They Know You Are Aware Look In That Mirror And Face You're Fear Dig Deep Within And No Doubt In The End It Is You Who Will Win.

    You Can Do This I Believe In Each And Everyone Of You
    LookingForTheLight and deanokat like this.
  2. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @True concern

    Congratulations! I think it's wonderful that you got the job. I can understand the anxiety, as it's pretty common when beginning something new. It's worth checking it out to see if you resonate with the job, and it allows you to be in the public to let your bright light shine before others. People will be drawn to the hope that you have.

    Reborn. You certainly have been Reborn and it's okay to not have it all figured out right now. In the Bible, it talks about spiritual maturity, and how spiritual newborns need to be fed milk and honey before the solid stuff. So you're growing on a lot of levels, and I think it's beautiful that you are discovering more about yourself and God and life and people. Maturity - spiritual and emotional - takes time....and effort... and faith... etc. And you don't have to have it all figured out. I sure know that I don't LOL

    I'm offering gratitude for your opportunity in this job. Give your anxiety to your higher power and ask to be used in this position for the greater good. Proud of you!

    Sending Big Love Your Way!
    True concern and deanokat like this.
  3. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    Holy crap, @True concern! That's all kinds of awesome!!! Congratulations!!!

    Yeah, starting a new job can be a little anxiety- and stress-inducing. But try not to let it affect you too much. I know you'll do great! Because I believe you ARE ready!

    I know I've said this before, but I'll say it again: I can't even begin to tell you how proud I am of you. You've come so far. And you've worked so hard to improve yourself. You are a total badass, my brother!

    Thanks for putting a HUGE smile on my face this morning. I am sooooooo happy for you!!!!!! :D
    True concern likes this.
  4. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    I am extremely humbled and incredibly grateful for everyone who has been in my corner this past year...My life,my mind,my soul,my heart has been altered here through the word's we pass back and fourth for the better.I have indeed found work,yet I have not worked 1 day as of yet,yesterday I received a call from the man who was going to be my boss...He called me for a second sit down meeting to discuss the job and my plan of bringing growth to a business which is already massive,the company is national throughout the U.S. it is currently owned by a man worth roughly 20 billion dollar's, so for them to ask me these questions seemed arbitrary but I imagine it was a filling out process.A few questions were asked and I started to respond,much like I do here I answered in great detail and took it a step further as my mouth just wouldn't shut,I didn't mindlessly agree with who was supposed to be my boss rather I respectfully pointed out where he was looking at the big picture in the wrong light,I offered a small part of my knowledge that seemed to upset him.The second meeting I thought I messed up by talking to much but I did so because of the growth I have gone through this past year and I don't want to go to work in a way that doesn't make sense for my own sanity.Right as I walked in the door I received a phone call from the man who was going to be my boss and he told me he would love to have me work for him but his boss had other plan's for me.I received a phone call about 2 hour's later and spoke to the bosses boss,he offered me a promotion before I even worked my first day,Full benefits,guaranteed salary,plus commission on top of my salary on everything I sale.The initial interview was for a low level position and now it appears I will be managing my own location all together with a staff of around 100 employees or so,not just this huge difference in opportunity but I will be running a location in the rich part of town,a place I couldn't afford to shop or even visit for the weekend.I come from a very poor background, I live in a 2 bedroom apartment with 5 people and it takes all of us to make it month to month,now this poor man is going to be working in an area where home's cost a million or higher to purchase. I am kind of nervous about this because I have never been a person who thought I would be in charge of a location so big and not just that but in the wealthy part of town.I don't know what to expect and I pray it work's out for the best, I'm not sure why I am receiving this opportunity but I am very grateful and humbled by it.I am not questioning any longer if this is right for me,I am just going to trust the path God has put in front of me and do the best I can to follow it correctly. I post this update with hope's it inspires someone,if you are currently in the grasp of addiction and you feel you're at the end of your rope,please go and start reading my post from the beginning here almost a year ago,I have been lost,felt hopeless,and thought I deserved to die.I have cried,fallen,failed,and disappointed but I kept fighting and still to this day I continue to fight.Change is possible, life can improve just never give up,Never stop fighting You can succeed, I believe in you,we all believe in you. Stay Strong my friend's you are not alone.
    deanokat likes this.
  5. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    Wow. I’m (almost) speechless, Arthur. I have to admit, while I was reading your post I was worried that you were going to say something like, “I talked too much and they decided not to hire me.” My heart is so full of happiness for you. Im so proud of how far you’ve come. You’ve worked so hard, and look what it’s gotten you: A terrific chance! I know you’re probably nervous, but I also know you can do this. And don’t worry about being in the rich part of town. In the end, people are people. Or at least I like to think so.

    You’re the man, @True concern! Wonderful things are coming your way! Be grateful and accepting of them, my friend! :)