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Are you judgemental?

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by remnant, Feb 24, 2016.

  1. remnant

    remnant Community Champion

    Are you judgemental? I have come across numerous instances where people judge drug abusers and alcoholics and view them with contempt. It doesn't help that most people have passed through this phase at one time or another during their lifetime. Others have siblings, parents or friends who abuse drugs. I have found myself being contemptuous towards drunkards only to find myself drinking. It feels right when I do it but not to others.
  2. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    Who am I to judge another? If for no other reason than not knowing how our lives and the lives of our loved ones will turn out, we need to take the rafter out of our own eyes and stop seeking to judge others.
    Zyni likes this.
  3. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    Having been an addict I never could judge others who are slaves to addiction. I'd be a hypocrite. I never could judge anyone because I don't what made them start using drugs. I used drugs to cope with trauma even though I didn't know it at that time. Addicts need help/support, not judgment.
  4. MrsJones

    MrsJones Community Listener Community Listener

    I don't know if I'm really judging a person because they are an addict or because of the way they are living their lives. Sometimes it is hard to tell that a person has an addiction other times it's very apparent. I didn't judge my soon to be husband before we were married. So does that mean that judging a person occurs only when it's apparent? I think it's only fair to say that judging an addict is no worse than judging any individual for whatever the reason.
  5. Tremmie

    Tremmie Community Champion

    I'm judgmental but of other kind of activities... nothing that has to do with alcohol, drugs or sexual preferences. I don't like to judge people over that kind of things, I actually try not to be very judgmental because that is something I've never appreciated from other people. When I meet someone who has a drug or alcohol problem the first thing that comes to my mind is this question: how could this poor soul end up like this?
  6. darkrebelchild

    darkrebelchild Community Champion

    It is normal to initially feel repulsive towards an addict, but what many fail to understand is that it is a weakness. Not everyone can pull themselves together or avoid pressure like others. It is not something to judge others for but to be a source of help and rescue.
  7. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    I have never been judgmental of anybody. I may not have addictions but I am far from perfect so who am I to judge how somebody else lives their life? I am there to help and support anybody in anyway that I can. Judgmental people really bother me and I am quick to let them know how I feel. That is something I just don't tolerate.
  8. Nancy D.

    Nancy D. Senior Contributor

    Yes I have been judgmental in my lifetime. I do not like this behavior because everyone has something that can ultimately be judged by someone on the outside looking in. I try not to do this because you never know what it takes to be that person whom we may be judging. Everyone has a story and should be respected and given the benefit of the doubt.
  9. Mara

    Mara Community Champion

    I wouldn't want other people to judge me by my appearance, and the bad choices that I did in the past, so why would I do the same? Just like what Atticus Finch said in To Kill a Mockingbird: “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view … until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.” I wouldn't really know what has transpired with the person's life that led to him to become an addict. So I wouldn't dare presume that I am better than him and have prejudice against him.
  10. johnyork

    johnyork Active Contributor

    I try not to be, I can be though. I don't like when people judge me by my looks, opinions or choices so I try my best to be respectful of others. Sometimes I just don't feel very good and take it out on other people which I later realize was wrong of me.
  11. kgord

    kgord Community Champion

    I think we are all judgmental to a degree. We never really know what is going on with a person though, and believe it or not, we are not the most important people in the universe. I think we should always strive to be tolerant of people an situations. We never know what has transpired with other people to make them act as they do. We are really no better than nor no worse than anybody else. (although some people do make terrible choices)however, we are all in it together.
    Zyni likes this.
  12. Zyni

    Zyni Community Champion

    It's a work in progress thing. I really try not to be, but I do catch myself doing it sometimes. I'm less judgmental than I was when I was younger. Who am I to judge anyone?

    I saw a saying once that always stuck with me, and I'm trying to make it my motto, (not an exact quote, but) "Be kind to others. You don't know what struggles they're facing."

    It is, like many other things, something I've learned the hard way. When I've faced various struggles, people judged me harshly, despite not having any idea what I was going through. I don't want to do that to other people.
    deanokat and kgord like this.
  13. doatk22

    doatk22 Community Champion

    I definitely used to be that person that would hold contempt for people who are addicts. But then I got saved and had my eyes opened to the truth. They're in bondage. And they need compassion.
    Zyni likes this.
  14. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    When I was younger, I was more judgmental. Today? I try not to judge anybody. We are all human beings, doing the best we can. :)
    Zyni likes this.
  15. xTinx

    xTinx Community Champion

    I do feel that I have no right to judge anyone because everyone has a story I know nothing about. However, if the said alcoholic or substance abuser harms another, I may get angry at what he or she has done to someone else but only as a natural reaction. That doesn't mean I can't forgive him or her and offer support.
    Zyni likes this.
  16. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Don't judge other people if you don't want to be judged. Well, I don't really judge, instead, I try to understand why some people would rather drink, smoke or do drugs than just stay clean and sober. I always try to make them realize that these bad habits won't do any good to them.
  17. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    All my life I had never been a judgemental person. Who am I to judge other people? People had different struggles in life and we should not judge them to what they had gone through because we will never know if the same thing will happen to our lives. Let us just understand their situations but instead give them inspiring words and encouragement.
  18. fergilicious

    fergilicious Member

    It's very normal to feel odd around an apparent addict, especially an aggressive one- I can't even stand that. But some addicts are truly very good people, some are even very likeable. I don't think I can ever judge someone who is still struggling to be better. If I find that I just can't like this person, I'd rather stay away than judge. Anyone who judges an addict isn't being realistic, because anyone can be addicted to anything.
  19. angel_lou

    angel_lou Active Contributor

    During a low spell, I saw this girl who really looked down her nose at me. She was rude, judgemental and a complete bitch. A few years later, during a very rare clean spell, I was in a pub with some friends and the same girl tried to steal my handbag! My how the tides can change. She was a crack addict who had lost her home and her kids along with her self respect. I bet she wished she'd of been a bit nicer to me the first time round. The funny thing was, if she'd had asked me to lend her a tenner I would have! Not after she tried to nick my bag though, she's lucky she didnt get a smack in the face.
  20. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    Well it's not surprising that most straight laced people would negatively judge addicts, it's human nature, I guess since they don't do it. For me, we can't control how other people think, but they can control what they say, so they should just keep their discriminating thoughts to themselves.