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As a former addict, how will you prove to us to you can do better in your life?

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by mwin43587, Jun 4, 2015.

  1. mwin43587

    mwin43587 Active Contributor

    As a former addict, how will you prove to us to that you can do better in your life? Share anything you want about the topic :)
  2. rcdpink

    rcdpink Active Contributor

    Unfortunately, as an addict you leave a bad impression in the minds of those that you care about. This is not easily erased and it's not so easy to get the trust of these individuals once more. It's best to just live sober and do so consistently over the years. Eventually people will take you seriously.
  3. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    When your an addict you will lose a lot of trust from people and sometimes it's going to be hard to earn that trust again. I think the main thing is that you prove to yourself first that you've changed, when you've done that, it's time to try and show others.
  4. mwin43587

    mwin43587 Active Contributor

    Thank you so much for your replies :) Hoping for more replies and sharings :)
  5. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Since people would already have trust issues with you, I think the best thing to do is don't just say to them that you are now a changed person, but you should also show it through your actions and behavior.
  6. MyDigitalpoint

    MyDigitalpoint Community Champion

    Since long time before falling into alcohol addiction, I learned one thing; I have no obligation to prove anything to anyone as I stopped trying to fit in society.

    When one is too young, wanting to belong to a social group or fit into it comes like a natural thing, and some people catch early addictions due to this. Not me case, but after addiction I realized what you say; people may see you with reserve and do not trust you, but I don't longer care.

    I know what my truth is, and I don't have any need to demonstrate anyone that I have changed. If they believe it or not, this is their problem, not mine, and it's up to them accept me like I am or not. I won't cry, worry or do anything about.

    Still when it comes to family or your loved ones, you don't need to prove anything because remember, actions speak louder than words, and you have prove yourself you can do better in your life, that's enough!
  7. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I think I prove how far I've come with every day. Being able to go to functions and events now when alcohol is not just present but very freely flowing, and being able to say "no thanks!" is a huge thing for me. I feel like each time I can do that, it's just another positive reinforcer that I'm strong now. I'm not defined by addiction.

    I'm doing better in my life by being a great wife and mother. They're two things I would never envisioned for myself in the depths of it all. If I couldn't be responsible for myself, I didn't understand how I could ever be responsible for a child - but that's changed completely and now I relish the fact that my child never had to witness her mother with an addiction and never will.
    MyDigitalpoint likes this.
  8. MyDigitalpoint

    MyDigitalpoint Community Champion

    Yes, one actions is what really count, and certainly when someone has children, addiction should stop.

    Witnessing a parent relapsing, doing drugs, drinking or else may not only affect children's perception, but also push them to do the same in adulthood, if not earlier.
  9. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    I have never been an addict myself, but I fear an addict might set him or herself up for a fall if they set out to prove things to others. I would think that in recovery while they want to bring joy to others the recovery process should be about what they can prove to themselves.

    In my own life I want to prove to "ME" that I can do this.
    CallipygianGamine likes this.
  10. missbishi

    missbishi Community Champion

    I'm not particularly comfortable with being asked to "prove" that I am doing better with life now. Why should I have to prove anything, especially in a community such as this?

    I've been cocaine-free for almost 9 years now. I know I'm doing much better these days so stuff what anyone else thinks, caring too much about what other people thought was part of the reason I got into a mess in the first place.
    CallipygianGamine likes this.
  11. CallipygianGamine

    CallipygianGamine Community Champion

    Agreed with the two posters above me, I think that was badly worded. The only person I should have to prove myself to is myself, and the same holds true for everyone else. And yes, so much yes to caring too much about what others think leading to ruin. I know it did for me. The main thing is that I know I’m taking responsibility for my life, and if someone else doesn’t see it that way, they can keep it to themselves.
  12. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    That was pretty much what my reply was saying also. The only person you need to worry about is yourself, if you know your doing better then that should be good enough, if people want you to prove it, then I think it's probably time to question why they're in your life in the first place.
    CallipygianGamine likes this.
  13. JonnyMacdonald

    JonnyMacdonald Community Champion

    There is a sense of peace that comes to you when you values, goals and life all align.
    I can't describe it, but it's the most wonderful feeling. I imagine it's what God feels like, or what it feels like to be by his side.
    It's better than any high I have felt, and It doesn't come with any lows. It can be fleeting, but you never feel obligated to chase it.
    It's just this wonderful, happy, content and calm feeling. It only came after I cleaned up.

    Also it's the little things in life that really make me happy now. A good meal with family, having caring supportive people in your life.
    You know I think it's those people that really make the clean sober life awesome. My old drunkard friends said in a haze they would die for me. Once the booze ran dry or I had a real problem they would escape to some bar and hide so they didn't actually have to help me.
    Now I am blessed to be surrounded by amazing people, people who will move heaven and earth to help me. Each day is just a blessing, each moment is charitable. I no longer feel that anxiety to go and get wasted and I don't feel like garbage for a week after.