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Attitudes to Failure

Discussion in 'Sobriety Tips and Inspiration' started by DK01, Feb 15, 2015.

  1. DK01

    DK01 Active Contributor

    I read an interview in Wired Magazine about 4 years ago, the interview was with Jack Dorsey (one of the founders of Twitter), and he remarked that the UK's attitude towards failure is not like in the US, where failure is encouraged and see as a necessity before success. I can personally say from my experience that he is right.

    Can anyone share their experiences when it comes to failure and how they've been received?
  2. bluzkluz09

    bluzkluz09 Active Contributor

    In my experience in the U.S. we do see and hear stories about success coming from failures. Overseas though failure is seen as the end of the story. I like the stories about the success from failures. It makes me think about scientists. I doubt they ever ran an experiment once and got it right. When we learned to ride a bicycle we had failed attempts before getting it right. As with everything there are no guarantees but I wish that everyone could be more positive and not see a failure as a lack of trying or paint a doomsday scenario. I believe we all have a happy ending one way or the other.
  3. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    Finding success in our life is not that easy and it really requires patience, long waiting and most importantly very hard work in order to reach your dreams or goals to be successful. And it is true that there many success stories that comes from failures at the beginning before they reached their achievements and prosperity in life. If failures comes your way learn to strive more harder and learn to stand up when you fall and always look at the positive side of life and you can find your way to success.
  4. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    In everything be it an attempt to overcome an addiction or anything, the chances of succeeding on first strike are rather remote. Expecting that you might fail at least prepares you for the fightback.

    Being practical [knowing that there's a likelihood you might fail] allows you to plan for any contingency but the focus nonetheless should be on doing your best to succeed.
  5. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    Consider failures as challenges to make us stronger and not as burdens to makes us depressed and feel unworthy. The failures can teach us how to value and appreciate success more. Also to teach us how we should on others who are expressing failures.
    DK01 likes this.
  6. goldenmaine

    goldenmaine Active Contributor

    My parents always taught me that is fine to fail as long as we have learned from these failures and mistakes and apply them to our next challenges in order to succeed more and avoid making the same mistakes. I have brought this notion throughout my life and it has greatly helped me overcome different challenges ahead of me. It really depends on how the people around you view failure. Some are perfectionists and failure is not an option for them. For me this is unhealthy because when they fail the results are too devastating for them and they may end up feeling so sad and depressed and it would take too long for them to move on from this feeling.
  7. kjonesm1

    kjonesm1 Community Champion

    I feel that no matter how you feel about failing, it's bound to happen sometime. The important thing is how you respond to failing. No matter how many times you fall , if you don't get back up you won't get to where you need to be.
  8. JoshPosh

    JoshPosh Community Champion

    If he didn't talk to every single american about failure, then his statement of the different views between the UK and USA has no bearing. I don't have the same definition of failure as my neighbor, but according to this guy we do? Since when?
  9. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    I've always been scared of being rejected and failures, like I really have a huge ego, and I sometimes feel that, "Why did that happen? I'm too good for this thing and I just got declined like that?" But right now, I'm trying to accept that life is a big prank and you have to know how to deal with it.
    DK01 likes this.
  10. DK01

    DK01 Active Contributor

    LOL, that's one I've never encountered that reason before to fear failure, and your honesty is refreshing!
  11. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Yes. I think highly of myself to feel better. Somehow like a coping mechanism, so when I get rejected, I just tell myself, "Well, maybe there's something wrong with them or I'm just too good for them, they just couldn't keep up." :D
  12. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    I will admit that I had experienced failures in my life but it never stops me from standing up again to where I fall down. At the start it is painful and thinking that moving on is very hard. But thanks for the strength and courage and a keen positive thoughts in mind for having a good acceptance out of these failures and that is the reason why I am a stronger person by now.
  13. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    I think it really depends on the attitude and personality of the person on how he takes failure. If the person really dwells on the negative, then he might see it as a "proof" that he can't be successful, so he will be depressed and discouraged. If the person has that "try and try until you succeed" attitude, then it will just be an obstacle for him that he has to pass to be able to succeed.
  14. juno

    juno Community Champion

    I'm not sure that failure in the US is encouraged, however the attitude about it is that it can be a learning experience if one faces failure. "If life gives you lemons make lemonade". I think it is important to try to avoid failure and put a 100% into success, but I guess if you feel that in the event that you fail people will be there to support you anyway, then some people subconsciously may not put in their 100% that they otherwise may have.

    Nevertheless, it really depends on the person when it comes to failure. I remember that back in college if I did not do well on exams, I looked at it as a situation that could not be changed and all I could do is learn from it and change my study habits and efforts I put in for the next exam. I did not dwell on the grade and make my self miserable for the week. However, I had many friends who went through the same thing and let the grade ruin a lot of their free time. not that they were going to go home and study that very moment, but their mood was so low that they could not do anything else. So, it is all about how a person takes failure.
  15. 003

    003 Community Champion

    I agree that failure should be encouraged but not complacency. Not because you're allowed to fail, you're not going to persevere to succeed in the first try. One is only allowed to fail if he's done he's best to bring out the best in him in achieving his goal, but didn't end up the way he originally intended. Nothing is wrong with failure if came underneath it is hard work and hope.
  16. Lizel

    Lizel Community Champion

    It's pretty obvious that some people overreact failures, they think that if they once failed then they will fail more times,
    but hey guys it doesn't work like that. You might fail two times, six times, or even fifty times the clue is to never give up. You need to be obsessed with what you want to achieve, and then it will come eventually. I know how hard it sounds, but even after a failure you must think positively, yeah that's another hint after failing don't think "oh ****, i didn't get that and that, i'm a total loser" because that will cause a lack of confidence in you think something like "well aren't failures the real key to success? nobody will reach anything if they won't try as hard as they are possible too?".
    Hope that helped some people. :D Another key is to believe in yourself!
  17. wander_n_wonder

    wander_n_wonder Active Contributor

    There are certain cultures which see failure as a sign of weakness or incompetence. Fortunately, where I grew up, failures are valued because they say that is the best teacher in the world. I think that's totally true. I would say that most of the important things I have learned in life are all because of failures that I've experienced.
  18. imperivm1

    imperivm1 Community Champion

    Failure is inevitable. If someone tells you they never failed in anything ever, they're most probably lying. Failing is perfectly normal and routine, it's persistence that distinguishes failure from success. Of course, there's a fine line between persistence and folly, but finding the right balance is not for the average Joe. That is why there aren't that many billionaires worldwide, anyway.
  19. Adrianna

    Adrianna Community Champion

    Failure is an experience. Is it necessary? I don' know about that. I think it will make the level of appreciation rise. Failure certainly is not fun. There is this notion that there is a reason for this. This is happening because I am suppose to learn something. Whatever. Lol. Humbles you or something. It's like this club that you didn't join but you seem to be in. Probably it's necessary for extreme success I would imagine. Not everyone can have everything handed to them. I know people from all walks of life. I think that failure of any kind builds character and appreciation. Understanding and hopefully empathy. But is is necessary? No. It just is. Maybe it makes you a better person. Better husband, better wife. Girlfriend, boyfriend. Better boss, better employee or whatever. Realizing who you are suppose to be. Who you are suppose to be with. It's always don't sell yourself short. What if you do? Then someone suddenly wants to give you the world. I'll give you my experience at the end of this year.
  20. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I think attitudes to failure are probably different globally. I think that a lot of the time though our attitudes to failure are often shaped by things like our parents and our schooling. I think the concept of failing is something that I struggle with a lot - so much so that often I am reluctant to try new things for fear of not being good enough at them as everyone else is.