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barely hanging on.

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by, Dec 17, 2015.

  1. Member

    I am in desperate need of what to do next. In September my only child Zach who is 24 was diagnosed with progressive HIV. With the hopes he would grasp the news and thrive for a better life he instead turned to heroin., and pain pills I'm just sick inside I desperately want to help him see that he could still live a good life. He insist that he doesnt want to go thru a life dealing with HIV and plans to end his life..please help me help him .Thank you for listening. Cindy
  2. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    You need to remain strong for him and keep the faith that there will be hope so that he could also feel that faith and hope eventually. Maybe you can try seeking help to the support groups available like groups dealing with HIV and heroin abuse. It sounds that you will need to check him out always as possible to know what he is doing or planning to do. likes this.
  3. Member

    Thank you for your response. It's comforting just talking to others who understand.
  4. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    I am sorry to hear about your son. I can only imagine how he is feeling. HIV isn't a death sentence like it once was. They have come along way in treating it and people are living longer. He is young and he has probably just given up on himself. I agree you need to seek out some help for him. Try to reach him before it gets too far. I will keep your son and you in my prayers. Hugs
  5. kgord

    kgord Community Champion

    He is a danger to himself. I think you could have him detained psychologically...but yes..reach out toMH services, churches, friends, family, substance abuse groups anyone who can help. Your son needs help no matter how he can get it. Maybe if you have an HIV clinic nearby...they can talk to them. I think they may have some staff who can reach out to him. There used to be a very prominent one in DC the Whitman Walker Clinic that would be a great resource.
  6. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener I am praying for you and your son. It sounds like a very difficult situation, for sure. Has he seen a therapist? I think talking to one would probably do him a world of good. Please know that we are here to help and support you any way we can, Cindy.

    Peace and hugs.
  7. Member

    He won't talk to a therapist every appointment I make he won't go .he has quot taking his HIV meds because he feels he will then die . I need to do something quick I've put calls into his doctors today but have not heard from them yet .if I have him locked up he will probably hurt himself.
  8. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    If you could somehow get him admitted to a psychiatric hospital, that might help him. But I don't know if you could do that or not. When my son was a minor and threatening suicide, we took him to the ER of our local hospital, who transferred him to a psych hospital. It ended up really helping him.

    I will keep you and your son in my thoughts and prayers, Cindy. I know this has to be incredibly tough for you. Please try to keep the faith.
  9. MrsJones

    MrsJones Community Listener Community Listener

    Hi cclark6587. I pray that you have gotten some response from your son's physician and received the help that you are seeking for him. It is a heavy weight that you both are carrying. I'm glad that you came here for help and support. It sounds like you are doing everything you can to help your son and have been given some great direction from others here. I pray that you have someone close to support you as well. Take care of yourself and remember we are with you.
    Last edited: Feb 17, 2016
    deanokat likes this.
  10. pstrong1969

    pstrong1969 Community Champion

    My brother found out he had AIDS 15 years ago and he is still alive. Like someone else has said its not a death sentence any more. Your son sounds like he is suffering from shame and wants to give up. From a legal standpoint you could go to the court house where you live and have him committed by a judges court order. The police will pick him up and take him to a Phsyche hospital to be evaluated. Maybe this will be the start of the help he needs. If he wont take the meds he will get sick and die. So it is worth a try. I hope and Pray for the best outcome in this situation you are and your son are going thru. God Bless.
    deanokat likes this.
  11. Jasmine2015

    Jasmine2015 Community Champion

    I would say to first gather your own thoughts together. Like others have said it is not a death sentence like it used to be. I think he also needs time to get his thoughts together but he must be clear headed. That can't exactly happen if he is doing drugs to cope.
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.
  12. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion Hello and welcome to the forum! Whether we are into any kind of addiction or we are diagnosed with a certain kind of diseases or ailments our initial reaction is of course we will be afraid of our life and sometimes there will be loss of hope. This is what your son had felt after he had heard that he had HIV. As a mother I knew that you want to help him to the best that you can. Your understanding with regards to the acceptance of your son about this thing is not that easy. Don't lose hope and keep on praying that your son will realize that when there is darkness there is light to come in his life.
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.
  13. Member

    I tried doing what I thought would be best I spoketo zachs physician and she felt it was best to call the police before he hurts himself. Zach over heard the conversation went into his room and shot my dog Ceasar than he left I tried to stop him but he was too physical with me I had to let him go. So now I'm afraid I will never see him .I am only a parent that loves her child and the pain is so gut wrenching.i had no idea he Evan had a gun. I have been blind and some how failed. Please pray for Zachary he means the world to me why he would want to take my Ceasar from me I will never understand. Thank u for your support god bless all of you who care
  14. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion Just keep on praying for your son and never give up on your hope that he will have a better life after all of his emotional sufferings because of his HIV
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.
  15. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener I am so sorry to hear this. Please be very careful. How is your dog??? Did you report what your son did to the dog to the authorities?? I think that might be a good idea. A person in your son's state of mind should probably not be carrying a gun around.

    I am continuing to pray for you guys. Know that we are here for you.
    MrsJones likes this.
  16. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    I am really sorry to hear about the pain, and struggles you're going through right now, and the current situation of your son. Rest assure that we would be praying for you, and your son. Just continue motivating, and encouraging him to change his life for the better. Who knows, he may listen to you one of these days. Keep us posted.
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.
  17. crc3thebest

    crc3thebest Community Champion

    Finding a group of people who live with HIV will help him feel normality within himself. Also, prayer can be a big part in establishing a relationship with God.
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.
  18. doatk22

    doatk22 Community Champion

    You might have to stage an intervention and give him the rehab talk. He needs to get help and counseling.
  19. irishrose

    irishrose Community Champion

    Continue to love and support your son. However, an intervention with multiple people who care about him present may be necessary in order to get him to realize his problem. Also, introducing your son to groups of HIV positive people who continue to live life, such as support groups, may help him realize that his life is not over, but his health will need to be managed. Seeing other people who have managed to live with it may inspire him to do the same.
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.
  20. kgord

    kgord Community Champion

    Yes, I would report the dog shooting to the police. Your son sounds like he is a danger to himself and others. You may want to consider getting involved in a local AIDS support group. It is terrible what is going on...and AIDS is of course not a death sentence. I hope for the best for both you and your son.
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.