My neighbor and her boyfriend are on meth and have three children in the home. It's quite obvious by the condition of her skin and her constant twitching and moving that she has it bad. Her children seem in good spirits and are clean and fed, but I constantly worry about them. I invite them to my house almost everyday to come play with my oldest daughter and the girls have all developed a very deep friendship. I try to be somewhat friendly to their mother and we chat in passing. I love her kids, but wonder how their upbringing will affect my children. They are always supervised at my place so I know what's going on. Are my fears unjustified?
It's a difficult situation. On one hand your neighbors seem to be taking good care of their kids and give them what they need, but on the other hand they are struggling with their addiction. If you confront them directly about it, they might react strongly and their kids might not be allowed anymore to come to your home. And if you say nothing, it's just as bad, as you keep worrying about it. My suggestion would be to contact one of the meth addiction recovery centers and see if you can get some advice from one of their counselors there.
If you are starting to worry about the welfare of the children then maybe you should contact child protection and have this matter taken care of. If you truly and honestly can say that from your perspective that the children seem to be in harms way, then you are doing a public service by calling in the authorities.
As long as those kids are healthy then that is a plus. If they were looking hideous then that is a different story. I would still worry about the parents they are not in good health and should get some medical treatment.
Well if they are on meth then shouldn't it be reported to the authorities before it gets out of hand? I know some people don't want to get involved in other people's affairs but for the sake of the children I hope their addiction don't get out of hand and something bad happens to the children.
That's a tough call because if the children are being taken care of. Then child protective services won't do anything and you'll just look like the asshole who called CPS. I would talk to the parents directly in a delicate way. You don't want to ruin the children's friendship.
I'm pretty sure that's not quite how it works. Child protective services will only get involved if the children are being neglected, abused or are unsafe. As far as I can see the kids are happy, clean and have no idea what id going on. The oldest girl seems a little rebellious towards her mother, but I think it's normal for a 12 year old to start showing a bit of teen age angst. Maybe K is right and I should approach the parents, but I hardly know them.
My ex wife had an issue with meth addiction. She was subsequently arrested and lost custody of our daughter (thankfully). During the time when our daughter was with her, she was put in harms way on several occasions. She kept her feed and clothed, but things like missing school, driving across town in the middle of the night and the occasional sleeping binge put our daughter in a dangerous situation without my knowledge. If you suspect your neighbor is on meth--then the kids are in danger one way or another. I would certainly call the department of children and families to do a wellness checkup.
I was raised by a functioning meth addict. I looked well fed and clean but I was emotionally starved and often left on my own to care for myself. Say something to someone. It might calm your mind and help you sleep at night. Just think if something happens to those children and you didn't at least speak up in the slightest you will be left with a lot of guilt. Just my opinion. Best of luck.
Exactly. If something were to happen because you didn't speak up, it could be catastrophic. And if nothing is wrong after you made the call, at least you'll sleep better knowing you did what you could.
I think it would be more off if you didn't worry at all for the well being of your kids. It's natural to be skeptical of the neighbor kids and to ignore it just to be proper would be irresponsible. As long as you are able to supervise, though, and if you trust your method on how you've raised your own kids enough that you can trust them then you shouldn't have to worry too much.
For some reason, if the children are well taken care of, then that is a good thing, I just feel,that if you call certain authorities, things might get out of hand, I do not really know, because the paretns themselves must want the help, if they do not want help then it will be difficult for them to accept the help and be willing to change.
Keep a close eye on them. Make sure everything is ok. But one slip up and I would call social services.
This is what I worry about also. It's good that the kids are being cared for, but anything can happen when you have two parents who are addicts. I would discreetly have these people investigated for the sake of these kids. Who knows what could happen to them at the hands of "friends" of their parents.
They are not unjustified. But as long as their mother protects her children from becoming what she became, the situation is under control. And they are too young to influence your children. And most likely they will never do it, as they know how horrible is to be addicted to meth.
Watching the environment the children are is important, as they could start thinking it is the right way and parents are doing meth and they should do it as well. I think, if it is affecting the children than authorities need to know so they can take action so it does not get worse than before. I reckon that, if you see anything going wrong than you should take action before it goes bad and the situation is out of control.
I also think that calling child protection is probably the best recourse you have at your disposal now. Even though they seem to be well-grown by their mother, we shouldn't disregard the fact that they are still predisposed to getting the same horrendous habit as their mother's, so I think they need to receive professional help, even if they don't personally seek it.
Do you think she is doing meth in the home with the children there? Because that doesn't exactly seem "safe". My best friend has tried to maintain that her baby has been well taken care of throughout her addiction but there are days my friend doesn't even remember. Days where the baby won't eat or sleep. You haven't noticed anything like that with these kids?