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Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by imperivm1, Mar 20, 2015.

  1. imperivm1

    imperivm1 Community Champion

    I guess I've been feeling a little depressed lately. Being in my last year of study, I've been having these dark thoughts about my future. "What if I don't find the right job"; "What if all those years in university amount to nothing"; "Will I be able to provide for my family one day"; it's apprehensions like these that can ruin my day completely.
  2. Matthodge1

    Matthodge1 Community Champion

    I have recently had those exact same thoughts. I am a student as well, and the future just seems so big and daunting that it seems almost inescapable. However, after talking to some very trusted friends and mentors, I have come to realize that those thoughts are really just a part of growing up. We were meant to embrace the unknown at full force. It is ok to be scared, because it really is just part of what life is about. The good and the bad both make up our existence, and without trials and tribulations, what really are we? Without triumph in tough times, the entire human experience is really nothing worth noting. God forbid that we sit around scared, worrying about what life will be like. Go run after the future and tackle it and never let go of it, no matter what.
    Thestoryteller1 and kana_marie like this.
  3. medievalmama

    medievalmama Community Listener Community Listener

    I just want to say that you are not your job or your bank account. You have value regardless of where your career goes.

    No one knows where they will end up. It is important to live each day fully. By doing the best you can today, tomorrow will take care of itself. The best thing to do is exactly what you did: talk about it.

    On a side not, I don't know where in this world you are, but it has been a long, cold winter. Warmer days are ahead (unless, of course, you are in Australia.) The point is, seasons come and go. Feelings come and go. It is OK to be feeling exactly what you are feeling right now. What I can guarantee is that it will change.
    kana_marie likes this.
  4. Matthodge1

    Matthodge1 Community Champion

    I would also like to restate what was said in this post: You are a human being, not a number or a statistic. Always remember that. You are not your failures or your shortcomings.
    kana_marie likes this.
  5. E.Mil

    E.Mil Community Champion

    I understand that feeling. When I get those moments of worrying and trying to figure everything out it, and it becomes overwhelming. I stop what I'm doing and do my best to get my mind back on track. I encourage myself, because worrying about anything does nothing.
  6. drc52

    drc52 Active Contributor

    If those apprehensions are ruining your day completely you might have unrealistic expectations of the future, I would not necessarily call this depression. The thoughts you are having are indeed possible but probably slightly irrational, given that you are studying and working towards a good future.
  7. kana_marie

    kana_marie Community Champion

    I take everything one day at a time. If I focus on long term goals I'll stress and that's causes the serious risk of me failing. I focus on my short term goals. We are building a small cabin. I can't focus on the final product. I'll get overwhelmed and that's when I don't accomplish anything. I focus on: today I'll work on getting the insulation installed. If I finish that I'll focus on getting the vent for the wood stove situated.
  8. Thestoryteller1

    Thestoryteller1 Active Contributor

    Actually worrying about those things is completely valid, just don't let in run you into the ground. Worry, but use that. You are not yet graduated, that is the perfect moment for those thoughts. I was going through something else pretty big in the year prior to graduation, so I really didn't give it much thought.
    Write down everything that worries you, and start figuring it out. Find places to apply for jobs, prepare your resume etc. Find alternative fund source until you get your perfect job (may be side job). Also have some savings, I think the biggest thing that hit me once I graduated was the realization that a. looking for a job may take at least few months, no matter how educated you are b. after-graduation life is nothing like my life before, and it needs fund while I am looking for job (if you are moving from dorms to your own place- you need furniture, and appliances and internet and more...), looking for job requires at least semi- professional clothes which I didn't have, and so on, and so on.
    You have enough time, just prepare for life after and you will have much easier and happy transition.
  9. sillylucy

    sillylucy Community Champion

    I have been feeling this way too. I called the Department of Mental Health and they linked me up with a free clinic near me. Now I go once a month and see someone. I have a case manager and they help me manage my treatment. I am now on antidepressants that are free for me and I am feeling so much better. Just know that you are not alone and there is help for you.
  10. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    There's a saying that can apply to your situation. It's "just cross the bride when you get there", and I think you will feel less stress and pressure if you would stop thinking about the near future. Just concentrate on the present, and only worry when you actually started to look for a job. And always think positive and be confident, because being a pessimist will only add to more stress.
  11. Matthodge1

    Matthodge1 Community Champion

    I, too, suggest going to your local health center. If there is no one that you know that is able to help you with your issues, then I would definitely go talk to some of the counselors there. They are good people and they know how to help you with depression.
  12. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    I've been through that situation before too, but it was more of a post-college depression, like you really didn't know where to start, because all your life, you've been busy studying, and then one day, you'll wake and find out you're not a student anymore, you've got to act like an adult now. It was pretty scary. I felt like I was a fish out of water.
  13. wahmed

    wahmed Active Contributor

    We all go through these thoughts. Everyone of us, the harder we work the more scared we get that it will all amount to nothing. Just remember the harder we work the more likely it is to get where we want. Try harder and harder you will get there
  14. FuZyOn

    FuZyOn Community Champion

    Worrying is a part of the human nature, sadly! We all go through it from time to time but we really need to overcome it. Being worried that something may go wrong only makes the matter worse and most of the time things end up looking good.

    Whenever I worry I just like to take my time and relax, go on a stroll on the beach, in a park or just watch a movie, to get my mind off of things.
  15. 003

    003 Community Champion

    Hang on, be positive and always do your hard work. The key is persistent no matter how futile your actions may be, and keep being at your best, at your best. Eventually hard work will pay off, in a good way. May it not be what you expect. It might even be greater.
  16. Adrianna

    Adrianna Community Champion

    I think they call it doubt. You just need to find a way to get yourself up. Negative thought patterns are toxic and addictive.
  17. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I still sometimes put those pressures on myself - and I'm in my 30's! So I don't know how much help my answer will be. But sometimes when I feel like I'm doubting myself, I try and remember all the great things I've achieved already in my life, and things that I want to achieve in the future. Setting those goals helps motivate me, and stops me from feeling directionless. When I feel directionless, it spirals into a low mood and then it's when the negative thoughts creep in -- so I try and keep away from that!
    deanokat likes this.
  18. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    You never should worry about the future or things you have no control over. While yes getting a little concerned about the future is understandable the least you can do is plan for the worst so that in case of anything you'll have something to fall back on. Embrace positivity at all times and depression will flee . . .

    “Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them.”
    ― Marcus Aurelius
  19. oportosanto

    oportosanto Community Champion

    That is true and in fact we should try to focus on the present, when we have the capacity to do so and we manage not to think about the past or future, things start to go better for us.
  20. Psyduck

    Psyduck Active Contributor

    This is fairly natural at your age especially considering the fact that you're in your final year. Don't worry about them too much as things would eventually sort out themselves. Future is uncertain but that's the beauty of it. You never know the outcome and that makes it exciting. All the best in your life!