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Disciplining yourself!

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by 003, Feb 2, 2015.

  1. 003

    003 Community Champion

    How are you disciplining yourself? This is really hard because whom you are fighting is yourself, meaning you are not one with yourself. It's the battle between your id and your superego, and what you want here to win is your superego, and you just simply don't want your ego to mediate and just the two to reach a midpoint. What you want then here to happen is just to totally defeat your id, your pleasure. But how to do it? I always end up depressed each day, because I'm just too weak that I always give in to my id. And because of my depression, there's all more reason to yield to my pleasure, which is even more heartbreaking. Help!
  2. Linno

    Linno Member

    It's such a hard balance. For me it helps to remember to be kinder to myself, if I slip up I have a tendency to be way too hard on myself and then, as you say, it triggers the weakness all over again. So I try to tell myself to be kinder to myself, that I can't be perfect and I just need to try again next time. It's so easy to fall into the depression of never being able to control your own mind and actions, but it doesn't have to be a downward spiral if we can cling onto some hope and positivity. I think trying to control the depression is half the battle.
  3. missbishi

    missbishi Community Champion

    @003 that's a very Freudian way to look at things! But Freud had a good point, trying to discipline yourself really is an internal battle. The only way to get through this is to stop beating yourself up every time you slip and instead, get straight back into the saddle. @Linno is right about the depression though, once you have got this under control, you will be much less likely to give in.
  4. elles-belles

    elles-belles Community Champion

    I agree with Linno about being kinder to yourself. Honestly in this battle you are your own best friend and your number one supporter, so you really need to love yourself without any limits! You also need to realize again that you are just human and that slip ups and failure will come knocking but the main thing to do is focus on where you see yourself in a few years to come. It is honestly never easy but I just take the slip ups as part of the progress and encourage myself to do better.
  5. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    How to discipline yourself? First you need to change your attitude. Admitting that you are weak gives your sub-conscious freedom to force you to do what you've been doing because it's a habit. To overcome this weakness first you need to change your attitude. Think of yourself as strong. Let your mentality be, "I will do it" all the time.

    But to keep fighting you need to stay motivated. That's why I recommend reading inspirational stories each day or every time you feel like you will slip and fall. My recommendation? "Chicken Soup For The Soul" books.
  6. davidj96

    davidj96 Member

    I completely agree with Rainman! You should really begin by changing your attitude and getting in the right mindset. Only after that will you be halfway on track to getting to where you need to be. You need to have a good mentality about what it is that you want out of life and you need to push yourself to succeed and do not give up no matter what. Good luck!
  7. mikka254

    mikka254 Member

    Self-discipline is being able to also think about it without indulging. You should remove every temptation if you are not able to control yourself.
  8. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    You must try to be disciplined and to control the urges that are harmful to you. And avoid it as much as possible, like let it not be in front of your sight if you know that it will only be bad for you. There can be no one else to help you but you alone.
  9. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Self-discipline is what everyone needs to master. Some people are being easily hooked to something dangerous because they don't know how to control their urges and desires. It's just all about balance, thinking what is right and what is wrong. There should be a fine line between habit and addiction. Self-discipline shows that you are responsible adult.
  10. Thestoryteller1

    Thestoryteller1 Active Contributor

    For me I guess it was more about taking the emotional part out of "disciplining myself". For example you can't workout all the time, kill yourself eating whatever food comes in sight and complain you feel horrible. But I did that. Over and over. And sometimes it was because I thought that was the only thing that would feel good in a bad moment (junk food), and sometimes it was because even with all the working out I didn't believe my body can really change, or that I can (self-sabotage). And then one day when I was better I improved my eating, bought vitamins that I previously deemed expensive (but gave the same money for junk food etc) and decided I'm betting on myself, not against myself anymore. And eating right is just a regular thing, it's not about punishment or pleasure, it's about being an adult and taking care of myself. So that's the way I do it. Pretty much works the same way for other things, it's not about pushing yourself to do something you don't want to do, but learning to choose the things that will benefit you in the long run.
  11. imperivm1

    imperivm1 Community Champion

    Well, that has always been an obstacle that is hard to overcome without the help of another human being. I mean, yes, it is true that some people are capable of imposing self-discipline but since the person punishing and the person breaking the rules are both sharing the same body, slacking off is eventually inevitable. And being lenient is what drags us back. That's why we need someone else to do the disciplinary work for us.
  12. kana_marie

    kana_marie Community Champion

    I imagine someone important is with me whenever I get tempted. I can't let them down and disappoint them. It seems to be the only way I can completely resist. I have to borrow someone else's strength, I guess
  13. E.Mil

    E.Mil Community Champion

    When I try o discipline myself to do something, I have to really put my mind to it and fight the urge to give in. It's not easy but the reward will be worth it.
  14. kana_marie

    kana_marie Community Champion

    It really can be a constant battle. I'm fairly new at this "don't give in to everything that tempts you" thing. It's always been an issue for me. When I feel an urge it is all I can think a out until I have what I want.
  15. AFKATafcar

    AFKATafcar Community Champion

    Self-discipline is one of the most difficult things to acquire in life. The average person lacks self-discipline from the day they're born until the day they pass on. It takes a lot of determination in order to gain this skill, but there are various ways you can go about it. Without discipline in your life, you can't hope to succeed at much.
  16. kana_marie

    kana_marie Community Champion

    That was very well said! You are so right on, too. Self discipline is the answer to a lot of people's problems. They just haven't figured out how to do it.
  17. vespid49

    vespid49 Active Contributor

    As others have already said, it's pretty hard to gain a formidable amount of self-discipline. However, it isn't impossible. I think that self-discipline arises from learning and excelling in certain things and then transferring that mindset to other things. In that way, you'll have a set step-by-step plan to success that's systematic and rewarding. That's my two cents.
  18. oraclemay

    oraclemay Community Champion

    It will become easier with time. For now you should make sure you are busy most of the time. This will help you to not have to sit and think about your addiction. Disciplining yourself takes time, as do the forming of new habits. Give yourself a little credit, especially since you have set out on this path. It will come in just a while.
  19. gracer

    gracer Community Champion

    A person's worst enemy is his own self. The battle that you face deep within is the hardest battle of all because there's nobody else who can solve it but you yourself. It's hard because the human within us will always choose the path to pleasure and comfort even if it's the wrong choice. I guess you just have to possess a strong motivation within you that will tell you to hang on to the uncomfortable side for awhile so you can achieve permanent pleasure as a changed person. There is contentment and true happiness at the end of a dark and rough path.
  20. amethyst

    amethyst Community Champion

    Discipline is something that can be learnt. My philosophy is that if someone else can do something by sheer willpower, so can I. It all depends on what kind of targets you set yourself. Not many can completely change their life from one day to the next. For many it takes baby steps at first. But once they get the hang of how to achieve small goals, they begin to feel more confidence within themselves, and they gradually aim for higher goals.
    I don't think that anyone is weak. Everyone has the capacity to reach the same goals. The only difference is the time and speed in which these goals will be achieved. One can run up a mountain and reach the summit in no time at all, while another has to crawl on all fours. The main thing is not to compare yourself with others. You do your best, and that's all that counts. :)