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Do I Need To Get All New Friends?

Discussion in 'Marijuana' started by Jeff, Feb 24, 2015.

  1. Jeff

    Jeff Member

    This question might sound cruel, but I've been coming to the realization that my friends are the number one reason for my relapses...
    Almost all of my friends smoke hashish. The ones I'm really close at least.
    I'm afraid I'll never be free from drugs if I stick around, but being alone scares me even more I think...

    What should I do?
    Thank you for taking the time to help.
  2. JoshPosh

    JoshPosh Community Champion

    If you want to quit you need to eliminate all possible reasons to start up again. That includes friends and family. It's hard, but you have to take care of yourself first. Only you can take care of you.
  3. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    I think it will be better to get rid of those who are influencing you into addiction no matter how close they are to you. When the time that you totally out of it and can strongly avoid temptations, you can go back to them and help them out of their situation if you would want to.
  4. missbishi

    missbishi Community Champion

    I think that you do probably need to make the break. It's so tempting when joints are being passed around and it takes a massive amount of willpower to refuse. Try and make some new friends if possible, people whos lives don't revolve around weed.
  5. Lilypad

    Lilypad Member

    As hard as it may be, you need to ditch these friends, I know it's easier said than done but it's necessary. Ask yourself if these friends are worth your sobriety.

    You may think you'll be lonely but you will find new friends eventually,the right kind of friends. Everyone needs supportive and positive people in their lives and I hope you'll find them soon.
  6. Rowe992

    Rowe992 Senior Contributor

    Well if you really want to quit then you must get rid of the negative environments. If your friends are smokers then ask them not to smoke when you are around them. If they can't respect your choice not to smoke then I suggest you stop hanging out with them.
  7. jeremy2

    jeremy2 Community Champion

    Now that you've realized the reason for your relapses, you are on the right track to full recovery. But the big question is, how far are you willing to go? Are you willing to make a few sacrifices to achieve your most important goal or are you going to let your so called "friends" hold you back? The ball is in your court.
  8. HugsNotDrugs

    HugsNotDrugs Active Contributor

    You could try smoking hookah/shisha with your friends. It's a similar experience and a very social activity. Where I live, they even have bars/cafes where you can get drinks, food, and smoke hookah/shisha. Or you could buy your own hookah and bring it around when they are smoking the waterpipe and take a hit of that instead of marijuana.
  9. valiantx

    valiantx Community Champion

    In truth, hashish is not a drug that is so detrimental to a human that it will ruin their life, this needs to be addressed to people who are unaware of this fact. However, hashish can deter a human from doing what is necessary to excel professionally or socially, but the effects are not that dramatic or negative to a humans' health.

    I don't believe it is necessary to drop family members and friends in the case of hashish usage, but concerning other harmful drugs then yes it may be necessary to let go of such people. Truly, the most important thing to let go is one's habits, which stems mentally and is acted out - this you must do alone.

    OGRICHBOI Member

    If you genuinely want to quit smoking, then this might be a necessary step in doing so. While attempting to become 100% clean, I had to drop a few bad associations to reach my goal. It is all a part of the climb for me. Good luck in whatever decision you make.
  11. Jeff

    Jeff Member

    I know I'm going to get a lot of non-sense if I ask something like that. I don't want to deal with that.

    Those actually look cool.
    But I don't even smoke tobacco. Not interested in taking on a new habbit...
    Also, that's not common at all where I live.

    Thanks everyone!
    I haven't been with anyone since I first posted...
    I'm just afraid of being alone.
  12. bluedressed

    bluedressed Community Champion

    There might be some teasing if you are at a party and they all want to smoke and you ask them not to, when you guys all know it would happen.

    But maybe then you should hang out one on one (no group pressure, just two people talking) with your friends and explain them the situation? I mean, they might make a few jokes or a few comments, but if they are your friends, they should respect your choices. It might make it easier also if there is a special activity going on that would not be smoking-friendly. Watching TV will make them want to smoke; going mountain or wall climbing, not so much.

    You don't have to be alone. But you don't have to make yourself be in situations where smoking is easy and expected. If these people are your friends, they should have no problem not having weed on the times you hang out with them. And if they complain, well, either get new friends, or get new activities for your group of friends!
  13. kjonesm1

    kjonesm1 Community Champion

    I say if they are not helping you on your journey to sobriety you don't need them right now. Just because you might be letting old friends go does not mean you need to be alone. Find a support group with people who can relate to you and understand what you are going through.
  14. Charli

    Charli Community Champion

    If you are unable to control yourself around the substance then it might be time to move on. I'm not saying it would be right to place the blame on your friends of even the substance itself, because I have a lot of friends who smoke and a lot of friends who don't but everyone gets along just fine, but if you are unable to resist temptation then it may be wise to just do what you have to do just so you could quit.
  15. vegito12

    vegito12 Community Champion

    You could start off with slowly withdrawing from the friends and explain your views and they may agree with it and some may not but in time may see you are doing better when not with them. It may cause, them to feel hurt in the beginning as you are leaving them but it is the best choice for your health and life. I think you need to make the right choice and decide what is best for you and how it will affect you in the long run.
  16. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    That's too bad. I mean, you've been friends with them for a long time now, and you're going to ditch them? Well, I get you, you have a reason because they're becoming way too bad influences to you now, but you can actually improve your self-control if you are just willing to. I am friends with lots of smokers and drinkers, but I have never smoked a cigarette once in my life and has just been a social drinker now, but I'm still friends with them. Maybe you can do that too, because honestly, it's hard to find real friends.
  17. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    They say that true friends will not leave you in good and bad times of your life. If you have circle of friends who drinks and smokes the tendency is that you will be influenced by them. But I think that if you really do not want to do the same what they are doing you can have self control with regards to this and staying away from your friends is not the solution in this situation. When I was in college most of my friends smoke but I do not smoke with them and they respect me for being like that. Up to now we are still all friends and we had passed that stage of what teenagers are doing. And now that we had our own careers and families we still communicate and bond to each other if we have the time and they are really my true best friends.
  18. Coltodor

    Coltodor Member

    You can if you think that the right decision. Only you know what your friends are like and what the trade-off for doing so. You should look at the consequences and make sure there are also any other options.
  19. goldenmaine

    goldenmaine Active Contributor

    I don’t think you should judge them right away because they are still your friends maybe they are just experimenting. Talk to them first and express your sentiments and feelings towards what they are doing and how you are against it because of your relapses. I am sure if they are good people and you are close them they will be able to understand your situation and place. In the instance that they may treat you badly and take it the wrong way then it may be the time that you need to get new friends who are better in understanding you and are good influences. Friends should make us better people and they don’t deserve us if they don’t have a good vibe to us.
  20. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    When someone is holding you back from doing something which you really want to do, in this case beating an addiction, there's but one way to fix the problem: you cut them out of your life. You needn't be afraid that you'll be all alone. Obviously at first you might be alone but that needn't be so. Do something in your free time that gives you the opportunity to meet other people who don't abuse drugs. These will be your new friends.