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Do You Know Why?

Discussion in 'Sobriety Tips and Inspiration' started by scootpony, Mar 10, 2015.

  1. scootpony

    scootpony Active Contributor

    Well, you have a definite point there. Groups of mild mannered and perfectly sane individuals can become like packs of rabid coyotes. I still think that the seed for that is within, because on the other side of it there are always people who are strong enough to resist matching their actions to the majority in a group. Whether it be to their benefit or not that, too, has to come from within.
  2. scootpony

    scootpony Active Contributor

    At this point in my life I do what I want because I want to do it. Or, sometimes, because I know it's the best option at the time as there are some situations where we have to do things we don't want to do. When I was young, though, I think I often didn't really know what I wanted to do or not to do. In that situation the devil's lie often takes one down--well, you don't really know until you try it.

    I'm glad you've never gotten yourself into a situation you couldn't get out of. I don't suppose I have either, though I have certainly gotten into some situations where it took me a while to get out.

    Life is something else, really. An amazing journey.
    kjonesm1 likes this.
  3. E.Mil

    E.Mil Community Champion

    Sometimes I do wonder why I do certain things. I wonder did I inherit some things about my personality or character or what. Some things I do know why because that is just me.
    scootpony likes this.
  4. scootpony

    scootpony Active Contributor

    About the things you really wonder, I'd bet you'll figure them out one day. Especially if they are things you don't particularly like and would like to be rid of.
  5. AskLaplace

    AskLaplace Member

    I like what you said. 'we all overlap in some ways'. Btw, INTP is a personality type in Myer's test. Though I don't think we can all be limited by just a test, I think it just says thinking patterns.
    scootpony likes this.
  6. kana_marie

    kana_marie Community Champion

    I know why I did it. It wasn't peer pressure at all, for me. I hated my life and felt sorry for myself. I had so much going for me but I focused on the negative. I think it was self pity combined with the desire to self medicate. All I really knew in the beginning was it made me feel better, it wasn't hurting anyone else, and 'who is going to care, anyway?'
  7. scootpony

    scootpony Active Contributor

    I can easily understand that in some ways. As a kid, I was often quite depressed. My family, for lack of a better word, was very "different"; and I, too, got lost in contemplation of the negative at times. Actually, there was quite a lot of negative to get lost in.

    My shyness (along with warnings that it was best not to discuss certain things with anybody) prevented me from finding anyone to help me make sense of just about everything a kid even normally needs help making sense of.

    I had no real sounding boards at home or elsewhere. I have many times told my husband that, though I had all of my physical needs met (plus some) while growing up, in all other ways I pretty much raised myself. He says I did a fine job, but I say I went through an awful lot of unnecessary junk to get where I am today.

    I have since decided that I had help all along. It's been God who has raised me, but he's had to fight the devil the whole way.

    God won. Today I am the happiest I have ever been in my whole life and each year seems to get better. Sweeter. Not that everything outwardly is always perfect, but that on the inside I am strong, confident and peaceful. I feel like that I now have everything I need within in order to be able to meet any challenge that life offers up. And it's been that way for so long now that I can tell you faithfully that it is no passing thing.
  8. jeremy2

    jeremy2 Community Champion

    It's always good to trace the root causes of our problems. If we can pinpoint the source of our evils, then it becomes much easier for us to tackle our woes. Divine intervention should never be put aside as it's only God who knows what's good for us and whenever we feel his presence, we should humble ourselves and submit to his will.
    scootpony likes this.
  9. Matthodge1

    Matthodge1 Community Champion

    While it may be true that the seed is from within, there is definitely something about the atmosphere of having multiple people around you attempting to influence your thoughts. It is certainly possible to say no and be the bigger person, but having people constantly trying to persuade you is very threatening.
  10. Matthodge1

    Matthodge1 Community Champion

    It is possible that you could have inherited some of your character traits from your parents or other relatives/ancestors. I wonder that often, as well.
  11. pintbean

    pintbean Active Contributor

    I always felt like I wanted to try everything. I've always had this immense curiosity for everything but seriously everything. I get fascinated by a new potential interest so fast. I think that has been the part of me that was so difficult to overcome and now I am starting to understand that I can use this part of me to seek out the good.
  12. imperivm1

    imperivm1 Community Champion

    Peer pressure, a bit of insecurity and a dash of curiosity. It's different to every one of us. One thing is for certain, though. It's inevitable. Not getting hooked on the bad things we do is common sense and in some cases strong will. Those who don't own these qualities are the ones who need help. Unfortunately, there's nothing to do but face the consequences once the inevitable happens.
  13. Adrianna

    Adrianna Community Champion

    Sure it's having empathy for yourself. Understanding yourself basically. Maybe that's why some people don't seem to realize what it takes to have a great relationship with another. They don't seem capable of empathy for another, so how would they ever be able to do it for themselves.
    I am pretty sure that being able to admit when you are wrong or have done something. Might be a key factor here. Instead of justifying wrong behavior by saying it's another person's fault. Its like if somebody gets upset cause their new mate didn't pick up the phone for one night. They think the worst and begin to act up or get angry. How about just saying, "I called you last night. What was going on that I didn't hear from you? I was looking forward to seeing you." You might just get an honest answer. Or you might just get some convoluted answer. God forbid if they lie. But sometimes if someone lies about something like this. It might be because it might protect what they have with you and that the other was nothing or maybe it was. Well, it's called being human.
    What's my point? You get to know yourself. You get to know the other person. There's no harm. People sometimes don't engage in things because they don't want to know, they think they know.
    Shyness, yeah that can trip someone up. It depends. Shyness is kind of an attractive trait sometimes. Well turning to drugs is no way to escape being shy. You don't need these things to cloud the fact of being shy. People find different things attractive, it doesn't matter. Assertive is the one you want to get a hold on. A confident forceful personality. The other, being shy or pushy doesn't work. Forceful as in powerful, not as in actually forcing someone. There is a difference.
  14. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I think slowly I've gotten better at understanding my drive to do certain things, and how it's motivated. I think it can be part anxiety, part peer pressure, part not wanting to cause waves (so I just end up going along with the crowd), so I've had to work on all of those things within myself.
  15. akiram13

    akiram13 Community Champion

    Looking back I see my fall and self destruction in mamy different reasons. From the childhood of melestation, no one permanent in my life, constantly being hurt by loved ones, what really pushed me was when the last person in my life left. The one person I saw as everything and my strength. Always making other happy without being happy.

    This is what made me think life is worthless and just a hell before we die and have peace. Having no one and becoming my own enemy. When I realized what triggered my downfall I then knew how to help myself. Well in a sense. I think I am still pretty messed up in mentally but I do what I can to be better everyday.
  16. xTinx

    xTinx Community Champion

    I agree. When they say everything happens for a reasons, I believe it then and there. In fact, there should indeed be a reason why we do the things we do. The moment we stop questioning, our values start to crumble. We start losing our way. We lose our life's meaning. If we want a meaningful existence, we have to have a reason for being here.