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Drugs before I knew I was pregnant! So worried

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by Sazzful, Dec 29, 2018.

  1. Sazzful

    Sazzful Member


    Apologies if I am not supposed to talk about this or have posted in the wrong place. I have been looking online for answers & this website really struck a chord as everyone seems so un judgemental & listens to the person. ....Basically, I’ve done something very stupid. My husband & I have been trying for a baby for over a year now, we have cut down on our wild ways & been focusing on getting healthy in hope to improve our fertility......Last weekend we had a Xmas party to go to & I ended up drinking loads, smoking & also took some mdma. Please don’t judge me, I feel bad enough already, it’s something I’ve not done in a long time & just thought ‘why not, it’s xmas’ This was on the 22nd December. Anyway, 26th December I did a pregnancy test as I’m in the habit of doing this every month after trying so long, and it was Positive!!! Amazing, after so long...,I’m so happy. Then the dread has filled me at what I have done at weekend & I can’t stop crying. I’m about 4 weeks pregnant & I’m so scared. I have nobody to talk to, my husband is telling me it will be ok, it’s early days. But I’m reading so many horror stories online, I can’t sleep with the worry. I hate myself for been so stupid. Does anyone have any advice or has been in this situation? I don’t want an abortion, I want this baby so much but I’m terrified. I hate myself so much. I won’t touch anything again but feels it’s too little too late :(
  2. Lisadevin1

    Lisadevin1 Member

    Omg ur himan girl ive so much feelings readin this we nt ment to live we font k ow wen it gonna happen im so happy fr u though congrats girl
    Sazzful likes this.
  3. Sazzful

    Sazzful Member

    Thank you soo much xx I’m just so worried. Thank you for taking the time to reply
    Dominica likes this.
  4. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @Sazzful hey there. first, yes, congrats!!! this is great news!

    i've heard plenty of stories where alcohol and drugs were used far beyond 4 weeks and the baby was healthy.... so, please think positive. the alcohol and smoking likely will have little chance of affecting the embryo... i'm not sure about mdma... this is something you may want to discuss with your doctor.... i'm sure that might be scary to bring up, but could help you ease your nerves.

    give it to God... take care of yourself from here on out... your thought life, stress level and faith can help you along this journey.... if you worry for the next 8 months, that anxiety could affect your baby.... so, practice some deep breathing, prayer, meditation.... soft music, yoga, etc. nurture you and the baby.... let .... it.... go. there's nothing you can do to take away what happened, but you do have control over what you can think and believe and do for the rest of the pregnancy.

    i encourage you to forgive yourself...and go on to enjoy each day of this pregnancy....

    Joshstillclean and Sazzful like this.
  5. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @Sazzful... I'm glad you reached out. We are not medical professionals here, so I can't really speak intelligently to your situation. I suggest you think about taking @Dominica's advice and discuss this with your doctor. I think that's probably the best thing to do, for both your baby's health and your own peace of mind.

    And please go easy on yourself. You're a human being and none of us are perfect. Just take very good care of yourself from this point forward.

    We're here for you. And I'm sending healthy energy to you and your baby.
    Dominica and Sazzful like this.
  6. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    I believe your husband is correct and just push forward,live healthy from this day on as depression is not healthy for the baby either..So count your blessings you found out early,you're finally pregnant so from here on out just do the best you can and though I'm no Dr I believe it will be OK

    Congratulations on your pregnancy I know you will be a great parent I can tell by how concerned you are for you're unborn child.

    Just no more parties or wild time's :)
    Dominica and deanokat like this.
  7. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    Hey, @Sazzful... How are you doing? Please check in with us when you get a chance, okay? We're here and we care.
    Dominica and True concern like this.