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Experimenting vs Addiction

Discussion in 'Helping an Addicted Child' started by DancingLady, Nov 6, 2014.

  1. DancingLady

    DancingLady Community Champion

    I am not a parent, but I have heard many stories about parents seeing signs of drug use but thinking their child was just experimenting and would stop using on their own when actually the child was already addicted to the drug and would end up needing to go to a rehab program to get off it.

    Why do parents think their kids are just experimenting and are not addicted? There are a few drugs that are not particularly addictive, but so many that are very addictive. Is it a denial issue, or are there really that many kids who try out drugs without actually becoming addicted?
  2. Nergaahl

    Nergaahl Community Champion

    I think that people like those shouldn't even make kids. Why make a kid if you don't take care of him, help him and give him useful advice? I mean, I don't know how some people can be so irresponsible. Well, either irresponsible or dumb in my opinion. I guess they're just trying to be "cool parents", being so permissive, but they're actually doing more bad than good.
  3. sammy

    sammy Active Contributor

    Speaking as a parent, it can be very tough to admit and come to terms with the fact that your child has a serious problem whether it's an addiction or something else such as a learning disability. So yes, I do think there is the issue of denial. In addition, when your child fails at something, you as a parent feel that failure as well.

    I do think that some kids experiment and it never goes beyond that. Looking back to when I was in high school, I know that we often sneaked alcohol here and there but I never became addicted and neither did most of my friends.
  4. Gelsemium

    Gelsemium Community Champion

    The issue with drugs is that usually experimenting leads to addiction, so if a parent think that the kids are just trying out, that might be a huge mistake, especially with hard drugs.
  5. maryannballeras

    maryannballeras Senior Contributor

    I can't even understand why those parents would allow such things, even if it's just an "experiment." The mere fact that their child is "experimenting" in some substance is bad enough. Because everybody knows that when you start, chances are you will get addicted. I'm sorry for the term, I think those parents are just irresponsible.
  6. Determined2014

    Determined2014 Senior Contributor

    I do not believ in experiments a t all, it is those experiments, that will lead to the drug abuse, because why would a child say that they are experimenting, it is because they are trying to select their drug of choice.
  7. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    Could it be some parents don't know that no one is immune to drugs? That experimenting can lead to addiction if it goes on for a long time? Even if the kid is experimenting that should raise the red flag. And the parent from then on must start talking to their kid about drugs and try to get him/her off of them before it's too late. I think parents' failure to take 'preemptive' action when they see the first signs of trouble is the reason why there are so many teens addicted to drugs.
  8. megankl

    megankl Active Contributor

    I always told my children that if they ever wanted to try a drug, I would have no problem with it unless it was IN FRONT of me and not at a party unsupervised with friends. I understand that teens experimented and I wanted to make sure my kids knew that they had a safe place to do it.
  9. Charli

    Charli Community Champion

    I'm not a parent as well, but having been around many kids at college I can say that many of them do tend to only partake for experimentation purposes so I'd say this theory is not so far fetched. Of all the students I've seen and heard of drinking and taking drugs, most, if not all have been able to balance it out with their education. I think it's because most of the people in the university I went to had a healthy family life so they know much better than to go to the deep end.
  10. tasha

    tasha Community Listener Community Listener

    Parentd of today do not really follow what their kids are doing as they are busy working and stressing about bills. They do not spend enough time withe their kids giving them quality attention and with the feelings of guilt they allow their kids to get away with a few naughty things. By the time they notice again it is too late and what they thought was a phase is now a serious problem.
  11. DancingLady

    DancingLady Community Champion

    I think ignorance may be a big role, they don't realize just how addictive some drugs are. We know there are many who smoke pot sometimes yet do not become addicted to it, so perhaps parents, not wanting to believe their kids have a really serious problem starting or already going on rationalize it that way, forgetting that if their kid is using something more addictive, their chances of not getting hooked aren't very good.
  12. Grimp

    Grimp Member

    Children shouldnt be doing drugs xD. Drugs are for adults. If your child is using drugs you need to warn them of the dangers, but also try and find out why they are doing it. Also find out what kind of drugs they are using. If they are just using marijuana you can breath a sigh of relief, its the safest drug of all. Alcohol is a very commonly used drug by young teenagers, I was drinking when i was 15. It will be difficult to avoid your teens getting ahold of alcohol if thats what they want, but its quite a dangerous drug. Then theres a plethora of other drugs with different properties that are potentially dangerous.
    The best thing you can do to prevent drugs from harming your kids is to educate them on the effects, dosage and dangers of different drugs they might come in contact with. Just as it is often considered you can use alcohol "responsibly", its possible to use many other drugs "responsibly"so many parents will provide their teens with smaller quantities of alcohol to allow them to calibrate their dosage.
    Dosage is absolutely key in avoiding harm from using drugs AND having an enjoyable experience.
    Knowing the physical and mental effects of the drugs is also absolutely key in avoiding harm, as you can prepare yourself before and after taking drugs to minimise harm.
    Another key is you have to be absolutely sure that what you're taking is definately what you're taking; unadulterated.
    I use www.erowid.com to research drugs I might come into contact with.
    I am 24, I have used many different drugs, I'm not sure if I could be classed as an addict or not. But I can definately be classed as an experimenter.
    I am a luckier than your average drug addict though as I have had many beautiful life experiences that do not revolve around drugs. Drugs have their uses, but one mustnt let them become the be all and end all. The beauty and joy in life exists without these things.
  13. LostmySis

    LostmySis Senior Contributor

    Assuming that anyone who uses drugs is going to become addicted is like saying that everyone who ever had a beer or a glass of wine is an alcoholic. We have no idea how genetics & environment play into creating addicts. I have either a high tolerance or am not pre-disposed to addiction, because I can drink and it never affects me. After a few drinks, I never bothered again because I never felt the "good feeling" that people bragged about. I even smoked as a teenager, but never became addicted. My sister on the other hand was a full blown drug addict that took anything she could get her hands on.

    So it is possible to use substances without becoming an addict. Do I think parents shoudl let their kids? Of course not. No more than saying, "Here's a gun, play Russian roulette". But some people suck.
  14. Profit5500

    Profit5500 Senior Contributor

    If some people were to tell you "Here some weed wanna smoke it?" then you should be able to say no to them. If its your friends then that is a difficult one but they should understand that you do not want to be influenced by those drugs. Drugs are bad and addiction can kill you. I am lucky to not have dropped out of school for drugs.
  15. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    Agree that those kind of parents do not deserve to be a parent in the first place.
    The moment you see your child touching or having an illegal substance or thing, you should be alarmed already. You should know what could be the reasons he have it and what could be the ways to get rid that or avoid.
    TXgirlNCworld likes this.
  16. JoshPosh

    JoshPosh Community Champion

    Parenting is the toughest job in the world. It seems not matter how many kids you have or the experience you gained with being around them so much, you will never be the perfect parent and problems will change with each child. Now with that being said, parents are obligated to teach their child right from wrong. Experimenting or not, they should be corrected immediately and not be brushed off as just a one time affair.
  17. Teresa

    Teresa Senior Contributor

    Having lost a family member to drug overdose and having seen the destruction drug and alcohol addiction causes not only to the addict but to the whole family I believed my children would never dare to even try drugs. It was easy to be on top of what they were doing when they were living at home. My oldest two are 22 and 25. My 22 year old had broken into my home and his grandparents home , stealing anything he could pawn to buy drugs. This was the same day his grandparents loaned him $300 dollars. he did willingly go to an in patient rehab facility but was kicked out for sneaking alcohol in when he was out on a day pass. There is a lot more to this story but the point I am trying to get to is how does a parent or grandparent ever trust again when they have been stolen from and repeatedly lied to ? I love my son but I do not trust him and as I have seen him have violent outburst in my home when he has been told no when asking for money, I am afraid to have him in my home and do not want to subject my 18 year old to his violent outbursts. How do you help someone who refuses help? and when they claim they are getting help and straightening out there life..how do you trust them that it is not just another lie???
  18. TXgirlNCworld

    TXgirlNCworld Member

    For a parent to even consider letting their child dip their hands into illegal substances; just blows my mind. The decision of a parent when coming to this situation is the first downfall of the prevention. Experimenting illegal drugs has got to be the craziest thing; I can understand experimenting with alchohol to prevent addictions ( my first sip was my last), but illegal drugs...how and why? Teenagers need the cold hard facts and need to see first hand what a drug addiction is going to get them in life. The best prevention for me was not being sheltered from seeing what would happen if I ever went down that path. I think my mother would have killed us if we told her we were experimenting to possible prevent addiction in the long run. I think the first step to teaching the teenagers of America the seriousness of addictions is stop being afraid to show them the true hard facts of that lifestyle choice. This whole sheltering thing has got to go. We need to wake up and let these teenagers know that this lifestyle will amount to nothing.
  19. primalclaws1974

    primalclaws1974 Senior Contributor

    My thoughts on the matter are some parents are deluding themselves. It is easier to believe that your child can't get addicted, even if the evidence is before them. We all want to believe that we live in this perfect little world, where we are in complete control. It is upsetting to see evidence to the contrary. Unfortunately, not facing reality can be detrimental to the whole family.
  20. muthoni

    muthoni Active Contributor

    Some parents are so afraid of saying no to their kids that they allow them to engage in dangerous activities. I think that it is necessary for a parent to raise their child in a way that he/she is not afraid to come to them when they have questions about life issues. A solution to a problem will be found sooner than later.