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Friendships

Discussion in 'Sobriety Tips and Inspiration' started by pstrong1969, Jul 31, 2015.

  1. pstrong1969

    pstrong1969 Community Champion

    The older i get i realize how important friends are. Growing up i only had maybe a handful of friends. And to this day nothing much has changed. Thru my addiction i didnt care about people and who i hurt. Today i do. I ran into an old friend. He was my AA sponsor, we were both really happy to see each other. We exchanged numbers, talked about the past and today and what not. It really brought joy to me.
    amethyst and Rosyrain like this.
  2. FuZyOn

    FuZyOn Community Champion

    I'm happy to hear about your recent event! People should at least keep a handful of friends close to them, since you never know when you're going to need help or support. It's always important to take care of people that are close to you, since they'll do the same for you for sure!
  3. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    Friends are really important to have in ones life because their advice and support would be invaluable during hard times. If you have true friends around you, then treasure them, because true friends are hard to find.
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2015
  4. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    I agree. No man is an island, and everyone of us needs a couple of friends. We don't really need a lot of friends, we just need to have few ones who are sincere and trustworthy. And yes, we should keep and treasure those kinds of people who would stick with us through thick and thin.
  5. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    Yes - quality friends are crucial, I find. I used to have a pretty crummy network of so-called friends, who weren't really good people at all - they encouraged and enabled addiction (because really, they were all addicts themselves too!) It took me a while after I managed to beat my addiction to trust people again, and believe that friends COULD be good people, that wanted the best for you.

    I'm happy to say though that these days I have some wonderful friends that truly do make me a better person!
  6. CallipygianGamine

    CallipygianGamine Community Champion

    It actually took me quite some time to realize that one of the longest friendships I had was emotionally abusive. That explained a LOT. Didn’t help my trust issues at all either, especially because it echoed my upbringing. Sometimes I still have a hard time letting people in, or believing that they could actually wish me well. I’m trying to overcome that though, because expecting people to do me wrong is no way to live.
  7. pstrong1969

    pstrong1969 Community Champion

    I can relate to you about trusting people. I always seem to attract negative people. I get hurt and that makes me cold hearted. Picking out good people to share my life with has not went well for me.
  8. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    Good friends aren't easy to come by and real friends you never can lose. Drugs might drive a wedge between friends but if the friendship was real then as long as you are willing to apologize then a true friend will forgive and things will go back to how they originally were. If your addiction costs you friends, fear not. True friends never leave.

    A friend will walk in miles, will share tears and give you smiles and even though paths may sometimes drift apart, true friends never leave the heart.
    unknown
  9. Rosyrain

    Rosyrain Community Champion

    Friendships are very important in life and you have to be able to have a give and take relationship with them. I read people saying all the time that they would rather be alone, but I always question how this is possible. My feeling is that you should always have someone on your side to talk to, no matter what.
  10. Issac Asimov

    Issac Asimov Member

    It's always nice to here from an old friend,even after you've burnt bridges in the past. While not everyone is going to be friendly from your past, I find it important to talk to others that knew you back then, and see if you have become a better person.
  11. Adrianna

    Adrianna Community Champion

    Yeah, good friends are important. Do onto others as you do onto yourself. Everyone gets hurt once and awhile. What they do with it determines their greatness. Hurting people and not caring about it or enjoying it. This is like a whole different species of human beings. Don't say you are a good person. One should really get to know the culture in which a person has been raised. Be man and do the right things. If you want a monogamous relationship than man up. You get what you deserve if you don't do what Beyonce says. Lol. It's all fun and games until someone gets their eyes poked out.
    I've had a few boyfriends hurt me many times within the time. I always do my best to be respectful of someone's feelings and be happy with them. I go out of my way to do this. Usually if they've been a real jerk. I stick it out long enough, but eventually it comes to an end. Only to see that what comes around goes around. The worse they were to me, the worse their comes around is. So, I know that it's all good. Some people don't realize that there is a little whip lash that comes back in your face. I mean you can't just hurt people and not expect a repercussion. You just got to trust and have respect. Do your best and be honest. Has nothing to do with learning about someone. It has to do with you being a real man, and man up. Pushing someone's limits to do what? Make yourself look like a complete jack off. A human being that behaves like a predator gets treated like a predator. Outcast and lonely. Purposely hurting people and not caring about it is a predator. One always needs to take a look at themselves before they point any fingers.
    This has nothing to do with you Pstrong1969, but when someone says they hurt a lot of people and didn't care. I am speaking to who might be reading that needs to hear the truth, from someone who cares about other people's feelings.
  12. Nergaahl

    Nergaahl Community Champion

    I've recently started seeing my friends again. In fact, in the last three days I got out of my house more than I had the previous month! It feels a bit weird, as I'm an introverted, indoors person, but it's also really nice to see people want to hang out with you again.
  13. sksmith094

    sksmith094 Member

    Quality over quantity. Having even one friend that you can consider a best friend is extremely important for living a happy life. Even more important for people going through abuse problems and trying to quit. My best friend and I were able to quit our addictions together, and help each other stay strong every day.
  14. MyDigitalpoint

    MyDigitalpoint Community Champion

    Thankfully you have friends to look at, and I would say, keep them as the most treasured valuable you will have in life.

    To me, friendship was the most-sought after gem, but I was never able to find it. Yeah, I have acquaintances, but they cannot be compared with the value of an everlasting-friend.
  15. potatocakes

    potatocakes Member

    I find the most comfort in relating to other individuals! Only humans can understand the painful experience of another human. I find it is of the most importance to reach out to one another and find common ground. The more we are able to relate to each other, the less we focus on trivial differences such as age, race, sex, and wealth. Brene Brown says that unhappiness results from hiding your shame; she encourages everyone to reach out and share their shame, regrets, and embarrassments. By doing this, the shame is exposed and is no longer dark and secret. Friends and family can listen and tell you that they understand! And through this supportive relationship, we find happiness in each other, and we find joy.
  16. JoshPosh

    JoshPosh Community Champion

    Sobriety is lonesome. If you don't have a support group or friends, it will be difficult to go further in life.
  17. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    Friends are important, but what's more important is making sure they're the right type of friends. Growing up I've always been pretty outgoing and had quite a few friends that have been around, it's only now though that I'm beginning to realise it's not the quantity but the quality of friends you have.

    Out of all the people I know, I can honestly say I only trust about 5 of them, the ones that have been there through everything with me. The rest come and go, and while it's always nice to be popular, and have a big circle of friends, you'll probably find the same as I did, and there aren't that many who truly are there for you when you need them the most.
  18. 6up

    6up Community Champion

    Friends can be near to than you family members. Friends can really help you when you are in a problem. We need to make as many friends as we can. We are also supposed to be open to our friends so that they may help when we need them.
  19. Smarty

    Smarty Active Contributor

    Sometimes a friend can be the best therapist you can have. And when the time is right, the advice he/she can give you is more than invaluable... It can be life-saving! It can make you feel alive... It can make you see that you are worth a lot even when you yourself think otherwise.

    [​IMG]
  20. amethyst

    amethyst Community Champion

    In cases where one doesn't want to have much to do with one's own family, for whatever reasons, friends tend to become the family that one never had. It's certainly the case for me. I view all my friends as my family, and I care deeply for them. I don't believe in coincidences, so everyone who has come into my life has made a difference. I am very fortunate to have a handful of friends that I can count on in every situation. It's a deeply comforting feeling that enriches my life in innumerable ways.