It takes time to grieve. Sometimes you need to give yourself over to grief because of its overwhelming pain and deep feeling of loss. But when you come out of that darkest time, it can be beautiful on the other side. But succumbing to drugs and alcohol to try to alleviate deep feelings of grief is an easy way out-- but never an affirming comfort. Drugs and alcohol delude your mind from better understanding of identifying your pain and sorrow as something temporary. Giving yourself over to grieving is a useful tool to make you stronger and your mind still present and intact--all mental faculties able to respond to grief the next time around, normally and intelligently. With your presence of mind, drug and alcohol-free--untouched by delusional effects of the substances: you can see clearly and understand that grief is part of life. Also, getting acquainted with yourself and your loved ones who are also grieving, even in the hardest transition from grief to gentle renewing of your strength around people you love is worth the happiness as the result of your triumph for saying no to drugs and alcohol.