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Grieving Soberly

Discussion in 'Sobriety Tips and Inspiration' started by EditorsRHumansToo!, Sep 14, 2015.

  1. EditorsRHumansToo!

    EditorsRHumansToo! Community Champion

    It takes time to grieve. Sometimes you need to give yourself over to grief because of its overwhelming pain and deep feeling of loss. But when you come out of that darkest time, it can be beautiful on the other side. But succumbing to drugs and alcohol to try to alleviate deep feelings of grief is an easy way out-- but never an affirming comfort.

    Drugs and alcohol delude your mind from better understanding of identifying your pain and sorrow as something temporary. Giving yourself over to grieving is a useful tool to make you stronger and your mind still present and intact--all mental faculties able to respond to grief the next time around, normally and intelligently.

    With your presence of mind, drug and alcohol-free--untouched by delusional effects of the substances: you can see clearly and understand that grief is part of life. Also, getting acquainted with yourself and your loved ones who are also grieving, even in the hardest transition from grief to gentle renewing of your strength around people you love is worth the happiness as the result of your triumph for saying no to drugs and alcohol.
    Last edited: Sep 15, 2015
  2. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    I totally agree with you on that. Just because you are grieving about something doesn't mean you already have an excuse to resort to substance abuse. Life would give us a lot of challenges and trials, but they are not here to weaken us, rather, they help us to become stronger. Never let temptations and cravings get the best of you just because you are having a hard time. Learn to grieve soberly.
    pineywood likes this.
  3. pineywood

    pineywood Community Champion

    Well said! Dealing with grief while sober can be difficult for some people, but the benefit is worth it. This allows you to actually deal with grief instead of trying to hide it away.

    The truth is, if you never deal with your feelings; such as pain, you emotions can start to build up and cause you even more grief.

    Sometimes people can feel like experiencing the agony of grief makes you a weak person, but this is not true. It takes a strong individual to address their emotional reactions without masking it though drugs and alcohol.
  4. khans023

    khans023 Member

    So true. I'm dealing with this from my fiancé. He doesn't know how to cope with stressful situations in life and immediately turns toward drugs. He's always done that and now lacks those skills to be able to deal with the pain on his own.
  5. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    That's so true. I think people who have a low tolerance for grief end up consuming drugs because they do not want to deal with the pain. They ought to know that mourning may be unpleasant to say the least, but it will pass, and that's how they should look forward to dealing with it.
  6. xTinx

    xTinx Community Champion

    Each of us has a different way of dealing with grief. We can't really say other people's methods are plain wrong but there are ways to retain your sanity even as you grieve. Some people think escaping reality will tone down the pain but they don't realize doing so will only delay the inevitable. If you see someone in such a predicament, please do not hesitate to offer support.
  7. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    This was something that I did regularly when I was still addicted. I didn't have the right coping mechanisms in place for any sort of tough or overly emotional situation, and it led me to drink to mask or deal with those emotions. Once I better managed the reasons behind being upset/frustrated/sad/angry and learned to work through them it was a lot easier.
  8. harold

    harold Community Champion

    It is never a solution to escape grief through drugs. That is why it is important to be sober. Escaping situations in life is never a solution and would never be. I strongly disagree with people who use drugs to escape grief. This is just the wrong strategy! Face your situations with a sober mind and you will find peace after that. If You cannot face such situations with a sober mind, your problems will keep hovering over you and you will never move on in life. It is very important to stay away from drugs no matter the situation.
  9. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    I think that people try and block out grief and put it to the back of their mind instead of coming to terms with what's happened. It's easy to bury your head in the sand, it turn to substance abuce to try and forget what's gone on, but sooner or later you'll have to face up to a situation and deal with it.

    Substance abuse is a form of running away and hiding, and as we all know, nobody can run forever.
  10. Rosyrain

    Rosyrain Community Champion

    I was just having a conversation with a friend about grief, so it was nice to see this thread. You can't hide from grief or you will eventually end up numb inside. It is perfectly normal to give in to your grief and let the emotions come as they will.
    pineywood likes this.
  11. FuZyOn

    FuZyOn Community Champion

    Great choice of words, really inspiring! One important thing of the recovery process is to know how to grieve, even if that sounds like shooting yourself in the foot. You need to learn how to control your emotions and not let them get the best of you while still maintaining your day-to-day activities in check. You get used to it after a while.