Hi, I feel I am an alcoholic. I am going to disclose 100 percent as I have a lot on the line. Mom and dad both alcoholics. I did not drink even to a moderate state until 21. Increased to 3 beers a day, almost everyday by 25. Become a six pack a day drinker by 30. When I was 28 I started working full time as an entertainer in the music industry. Im 34 and over the last 3 years, I would drink at least a pint of whisky before every show and absorb the shots that came bought by patrons, then have a few beers before going to sleep. Off days? 3-5 shots of whisky-5-6 beers everyday. Tonight was the first time in a real long time I did not exceed 3 beers because I am itching like crazy. Here is my problem, over the last 3 weeks I have developed a very irritating rash. Itching all over, legs, mainly arms, a little on the stomach, bit on the back, but bottom line, can't be good given I have no known reactions. Just laid down to bed and had a yellow thumbnail. I know that is an indication of leaking bile, I watched my dad blow up like a yellow marshmallow. I feel like this is the beginning of a bad situation if I don't cease drinking immediately. Hoping an expert can chime in and tell me exactly what I am looking at there. My dad died from this when I was 17. I have a 2 year old that I was to see me out of this live at a very old age. I wanna be here, but more importantly, whats going on with me right now? Could my liver already be in a quitting state, in other words am I screwed? If I can manage to completely stay away from alcohol, will I see some improvement or is it likely too late? So why can't I just quit? I am in the middle of a major depression and with the added everything of life. cracking a cold beer or swigging on some whisky is the only thing that makes me feel real good, comfortable, in other words kills that anxiety and in many cases stimulates a little but of creativity. I don't ever get smashed drunk or blackout drunk, I just drink EVERY SINGLE DAY. Alcohol is my friend and my escape and while I have seen the consequences to others, I feel like I will luckily slide by and live a life full of drinking to my desire. Need some honest feedback. Again, I drink 7 days a week, every day of the year, sometimes only 3 beers like tonight, at worst, half to 3/4 off a bottle of whisky. I need help and advice.