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Helping a friend who has gotten clean

Discussion in 'Methamphetamine / Meth' started by Allen24, Oct 10, 2014.

  1. Allen24

    Allen24 Active Contributor

    I have friend from high school who has recently gotten clean. He texts me to hang out every now and then. I like hanging with him and I think he's a good guy. I just want to know if there's anything I can do to help him or if there's something I should not do around him.
    Joseph likes this.
  2. I'd try to not bring up his past addiction, because it's behind him now. I would just ask how he is every once in a while, someone caring really does help and thoughtfulness just seems to go a long way. The best thing you can really do for him in the long term is just to be there when he needs you, because sometimes it can get really difficult for someone who has struggled with addiction.
    Joseph likes this.
  3. Sarah

    Sarah Member

    I'd just be the same as I am with my other friends, as mentioned all that is behind him now and if he wants to open up to you then be there to listen. All you can do is support him and be a good friend. Show him that you care without making it about his addiction.
    Joseph likes this.
  4. Jen S.

    Jen S. Guest

    You're a great friend for even asking, Allen. I always appreciate it when my friends don't treat me like I'm the "special" recovering person. Most of them have at one time or another called me up or pulled me aside to say "Hey! What you're doing is awesome. If you ever need to talk about it, just let me know."
    Joseph likes this.
  5. sillylucy

    sillylucy Community Champion

    I never know how to approach people in recovery. I have so much to learn. I haven't seen a friend who got clean in about 2 years. I want to ask her about the time we have been apart, but think that might just bring up old and bad memories for her.
  6. JoshPosh

    JoshPosh Community Champion

    All the guys that I knew growing up that was addicted to the stuff and then later got cleaned, was never the same person. Too much meth changes a person. All of a sudden they talk, act, and respond to people differently. Some of them are now sheltered and have a hard time adjusting to real life again.
  7. jbepp

    jbepp Active Contributor

    Just talk to him like you always do. He's your friend and will always be, so forget about his past and just cherish the good moments you guys spent together and try to think of new ways to have fun together.
  8. frogsandlegos

    frogsandlegos Active Contributor

    I think you should just be a good friend as the same way you would even if he had never had a drug problem. Just be a true friend and "have his back."

    But, of course, never EVER put him in a situation where he could relapse. Never socialize with the wrong crowd.

    And, yeah, I don't think its important to bring up the past really. I don't see anything wrong with it though mentioning it once or twice and commending him for getting clean. It is not easy to do.
  9. jade870

    jade870 Active Contributor

    I have seen so many of my friends get hooked on this one particular drug. This is something I don’t quite understand myself is how this could be so addicting. To think all the different chemicals used to make this drug and you’d want to put this into your body. I have one in particular friend from high school that was introduced to this at 16 years old. I saw my best friend who was a straight a student was such a promising future fall so fast. It went from grades dropping and stayed up for days at a time to steal and and robbing from friends. I’ve tried to stand by them as much as I can, but in reality it doesn’t really seem to do any good. At this point they seem to be so far gone that they don’t even recognize who they are anymore. I guess time can only tell what the future will bring, but for the time being in a really think this is the most hardest thing I have ever seen them go through. It’s also hard to be a true friend when they’ve even cursed you install for you.
  10. Determined2014

    Determined2014 Senior Contributor

    Try to keep him busy all the time, get him as far as you can from places that have meth or activities that could remind him of his meth days and be there for him, be open that way he can trust you, to the pointhe can tell you how he is feeling.
  11. Adrianna

    Adrianna Community Champion

    He might be the better person to ask about that. I mean the best way is to just be yourself. I wouldn't put any focus on the past problem unless he brings it up. Treat him like anyone else. Obviously if you are coming up with things to do keep it productive. Something that keeps you both active maybe. Hiking or some kind of physical activities.
  12. Okaviator

    Okaviator Senior Contributor

    Make sure that you are loving and give a positive atmosphere when around him. Also be sure that you don't bring up any of his past.
  13. puneeth8994

    puneeth8994 Active Contributor

    Just chill out with him, don't bring up his past addiction stories.
  14. remnant

    remnant Community Champion

    Take the gamut and hang out with him. He is looking for someone reliable who will reinforce his will and determination to stay clean. You should feel honoured since of all people he knows, he has chosen you. Don't abandon him in this hour of need. However, make sure you avoid his former drug friends and advise him to do so unless they want to learn from his experiences on how he became clean.
  15. Mara

    Mara Community Champion

    It would seem that he really wants to be in your company. Perhaps he knows that he's in good hands when he's with you. Just be there for him. Hang out and have fun. ;)
  16. I don't want to sound funny when I say this but the best thing you can do to help your friend is by keeping him/her away from meth. Period. I have a friend just like yours and all we did was hung out, went to movies, ate out, etc. No meth involved. No talk of meth. Just straight having fun as friends should. After a while, they'll realize how clean and sober they've been around you and will definitely appreciate it.
  17. eric56

    eric56 Member

  18. morjoannee

    morjoannee Member

    Your doing it already. Hang out and reminisce of times you both had. There is nothing worst than a friend being cautious of they're behavior. That will definitely put a crimp in things and prove you untrustworthy. This question is a good one. I suggest you also ask him/her. They may be relieved that you ask. It's all good as long as you are a friend. The friends are my purpose for still being here with a head held high rather than my mind being high. Trust. Moments. And mostly the fact that my friends didn't judge my choices. They accepted them as a past mistake and never held a stigma forming attitude. That's vital. Open the door to communicate by asking your friend the same you asked here. It will impress and ease the mind. Good luck to you and your friend
    deanokat likes this.