Hi everyone! I'm new here. I've been addicted to alcohol for a few years. It became a serious problem when I got in trouble with the law. I was forced to go to AA meetings and was put on probation. During probation, I met this amazing guy. I was very open about my drinking and law problems. I was on the Abilify injection for depression and it worked, but it was an inconvenience getting it every month so I stopped the injection. He accepted me. After a while, I would threaten to leave him and we would work on our problems, but my drinking just increased and he started giving up on our relationship. I was also smoking and didn't like it due to the fact it made me so lazy and eating like a fat person. I told him I don't like it so I never really depended on it. Not only was I addicted to drinking, but I became addicted to him. I even cut myself to make him feel worry like I did. In the beginning, I was able to control my drinking and only used it when I was really depressed. Then drinking started to control me. My boyfriend was finally leaving me. I stopped drinking and he came back. But the relationship was different. I was only drinking when I was around him or when we went out to places. Then a couple of weeks ago, I stopped all together. But I had the worse withdrawal symptoms. I was so moody and we would still argue, but it wasn't as often. My mood lately has been a lot better and I've even made an appointment to get injections again but this time, use the 3 month one. Since I haven't been drinking, my physical health has declined. I'm starting to develop knee and leg pain again (I've had them since I was a teenager due to having flat feet). I also have a lot more neck pain due to an old injury and a couple of other problems. My last doctor drug tested me without my knowledge and this was a couple of years ago so everything came back negative (I found out on my medical portal). That doctor left and I have a new doctor now. I told my boyfriend all of this and that I couldn't smoke with him anymore if I want to get proper treatment. I really don't want anything to do with painkiller pills as I've had issues with those as well. I prefer to get an injection so I won't have access to them and binge on them.