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How many people have you lost due to lack of treatment/relapse?

Discussion in 'Questions About Treatment' started by Zyni, Feb 21, 2015.

  1. Zyni

    Zyni Community Champion

    I've lost too many friends to drugs, either because they refuse treatment, or they sought treatment and then relapsed. Some, I'm simply no longer involved with, others I've lost to death. Some have ended up in prison. The area I grew up in, drug use was all too common.

    I would give anything to find a way to get through to someone before it's too late.
  2. amethyst

    amethyst Community Champion

    It's horrible to see your friends waste away without being able to do anything for them. But I have long come to realize that often the best and only real thing that you can do for them, is to listen to what they have to say. They don't want to be told what they have to do or what they shouldn't be doing. They want to be heard. Even if they are completely focused on their path of self-destruction, don't judge them, but accept them for who they really are. They can feel that energy from you and quite often it gradually changes their perception about themselves, as they start to feel that there is someone who really cares about them. It brings new hope and meaning to their life. Someone or something to live for.
    Zyni likes this.
  3. blur92

    blur92 Senior Contributor

    Rather than the other people being lost due to their lifestyle it was me who messed up. I remained untreated for major depression disorder, social anxiety, generalized anxiety, and bipolar II. I engaged in some substance abuse then eventually quit talking to all my friends. It still gets to me although it has been several years since we had been close. I miss many of them a lot, and I wish I could go back in order to keep them in my life.
  4. JoanMcWench

    JoanMcWench Community Champion

    Enough. I've lost enough people. I think numbers are irrelevant when considering something of this nature. Are we weighing things like one person's mother to another person's 10 friends? No. If you've lost anyone that you know or even care for slightly you've lost enough people.
  5. Charli

    Charli Community Champion

    I've fortunately not lost any friends or family to substance abuse. We all have our bad habits, and for some it got really messy at some points but no one really allowed anything to get too out of hand. I'd probably attribute that to just good fortune but credit also has to be given to being raised by stable families and being in a fairly well adjusted environment.
  6. Zyni

    Zyni Community Champion

    Not at all. I'm sorry if it came off like that. It wasn't meant in any sort of competitive way, like my loss is worse or something. It was more a point of I've lost too many. Any is too many really, but it's been far too frequent in my life.
  7. JoanMcWench

    JoanMcWench Community Champion

    I'm sorry if that came across a bit aggressive. Also not how it was meant. My anger isn't directed at you or anyone really. It's directed toward addiction & the damage it causes for years after people lose the battle. Sometimes people think addiction affects an addict & when they pass the issue has passed. That's really not how it works. There are friends & family left over taking blame (whether justified or not), being angry, having regret, falling into depression, & on & on due to selfish self serving behaviour.
    Zyni likes this.
  8. xTinx

    xTinx Community Champion

    There aren't too many substance users in my bloodline, be it the maternal or paternal side. There were a few alcoholics but they all died before I could meet them (my maternal grandfather for instance). Another grandfather went insane and refused to eat after a conflict with the family. He also died when I was in middle school. Thankfully, the current generation of aunts and uncles are sober except for one. Still, there's a good reason why we have such friends and family members. We can learn from their struggles and seek to avoid repeating their mistakes.
  9. pineywood

    pineywood Community Champion

    Oh, this is a sad, painful question! I have lost more than I would like to think about.

    I am going to assume you mean lost, as in deceased and no longer with me because I do have both and friends and relatives that I am losing, right now that I have lost. They are no longer, the fun, healthy person they was were in life!

    I can relate to members of my family that passed away before I was born, too. I had a a great grandfather. He ended up living his late days in the state asylum. Yep, back then, that is where people were placed. He also lived with family members, until his behavior became too much to handle.

    But back to the question at hand, one of my close high school friends died too early of alcohol overdoes. I know there is a word for this, just can not think of it off the top of my head. Another friend from way back from my days of elementary school from cocaine. There are more, but these two really impacted my life. I miss them dearly. Their funerals were a traumatic, senseless experience.
  10. Zyni

    Zyni Community Champion

    No worries. I completely agree with you. It is sad how many people can be affected by such tragedies. I think we're always left wondering if we could have done more, feeling anger/pain/guilt and more.