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How to Cope With Your Spouse's Withdrawal

Discussion in 'Helping an Addicted Loved One' started by DLWright, Oct 19, 2014.

  1. DLWright

    DLWright Member

    Hello! My husband has some intense mood swings and difficulty controlling his anger (especially when he's going through withdrawal). He is currently addicted to his cigarettes and his MJ. Honestly, I'd rather him smoke the MJ than the cigarettes. But, our financial situation is not always the best and the withdrawal he goes through in the time we can't support his habits is intense.

    Regardless of how short or long the period of time is when he can't/doesn't have anything to smoke, he always seems to come right back to it. He has a pretty addictive personality though and some bad impulse issues because he also has a problem drinking 5-hour energy drinks as well.

    I guess what I'm looking for is advice/tips on how, as a spouse, you get through the times when your spouse is going through withdrawal. I'm supportive of my husband in every shape of the word and just want to keep him happy. But, I hate what lack of substance does to his personality and his mood. It's disheartening to see the difference in his personality with and without it.
  2. Jen S.

    Jen S. Guest

  3. Charli

    Charli Community Champion

    I'm no expert and can only speak from experience so just take my words with a grain of salt, but I'd recommend looking into vaping if you want to ween your husband off cigarettes. It costs about the same or possibly even lower than regular cigarettes, at least where I'm from, and they are a lot healthier and will probably cost you a lot less in hospital bills in the long run. From what I understand, its main difference from cigarettes is that it doesn't contain tar and it utilizes vapor or steam instead of smoke so it's less harmful. It's also much easier to quit this way as a lot of my friends have transitioned into this and got off cigarettes that way and then eventually they just started to need even the vaporizers less and less. Doing it this way would at least skip the mood swing/withdrawal stage as he would still be able to get his nicotine fix in the meantime without all the other stuff.
  4. sarahxalex

    sarahxalex Member

    I have only had a few friends experience in withdrawals, so I too, am no expert at all but I can recommend some things based off of what I have seen and read. Maybe start your husband off with an e-cig. They have great flavors and you can get flavors/fillings that have no nicotine but you're still getting the smoke illusion as if you were smoking a cigarette. They are becoming very popular now a days and has helped a lot of my friends stop smoking. I have also heard vaporizers work well and are much healthier, as also stated in the post above mines. Your husband can still get a fix while not having as many mood swings/withdrawal symptoms. Also try to have patience with him, even though it seems he is being very mean at times, he doesn't mean to do it on purpose. He just needs to know that you're there for him and trying to help as much as you can.
  5. OhioTom76

    OhioTom76 Senior Contributor

    That is a great Do & Don't list. One of the things I think people forget is that when a loved one is struggling with addiction problems, don't try to make this all about you, and don't inflame an already volatile situation by nagging and criticizing the person. Constantly complaining about their attitude and how their habits are annoying you will make it all worse. Yes the person is going to mood swing on you, just learn to tune that out and not take it so personally, they are in a compromised state of mind and their body chemistry is out of whack. In one ear and out the other.

    I would say, participating in more events in public where smoking is not allowed, such as going out to a movie and or dinner, will help deal with the stress - it's certainly better than sitting around bored at home with nothing to do. Plus if you're not blowing $65 a week on a carton of smokes, you can use that money for entertainment.
  6. dinomarino1

    dinomarino1 Member

    in all honesty MJ should be the least of your concerns. he is stressed out because you are riding him about quitting smoking. you have to ease him off maybe suggest a smokeless alternative? Maye only smoke mj on the weekends?
  7. tasha

    tasha Community Listener Community Listener

    Anything that you do or say will trigger him into a mood swing, so it is best to try and give him some time and space to go through it quietly. You could also cook mood foods for dinner to ease his swings without him knowing.
    Try foods that will help with anxiety and uplift his moods to make it easier;
    Carbohydrates promote seratonin and this could be found in rice, oats
    Vegetables and fruit that have vitaminB affect the neurotransmitters that impact moods, spinach, broccoli, citrus fruit
    Fish or anything with Omega 3 in it salmon, tuna, sardines, mussels are great producers of seratonin and dopamine
    Coconut (even the fragrance) can change your mood and slow your heart rate down and soothe stress
    Green tea if you can get him to have 5 cups a day
    These will help with the mood swings especially the scent of coconut as you can get a spray in the house and he wont even know what you are doing but he will slow down with the mood swings.
  8. CrystalMarie

    CrystalMarie Member

    Hello, my significant other quit doing drugs recently. I must say that it is a process on both of our ends. I have to be sure to encourage him but sometimes his withdrawal symptoms are hard to deal with. He gets really snappy and I have to remind him where his anger is coming from. It is a journey and he gets better everyday.
  9. thomas carty

    thomas carty Member

    I am no expert but I will tell you that right now you should just do your best to be as supportive as you can and do your best to avoid doing anything that you think might aggravate him. Just whenever you see him getting into a mood swing you should do your best to give him his space.
  10. LostmySis

    LostmySis Senior Contributor

    If his mood swings involve physical or emotional abuse, be sure to protect yourself and your children. It is not cold or unfeeling to expect him to give something up that is putting a financial strain on your family. I bet you are not draped in jewelry or furs! It is estimated that the average smoker spends $4,000 per year on cigarettes and will spend tens of thousands on health care. Perhaps if you keep track of the costs, you might be able to reach him logically. There is a difference between discussion and nagging. Be sure to speak calmly, and be non-combative. Good luck