An American Addiction Centers Resource

New to the Forums?Join or

How to Help a Friend

Discussion in 'Sobriety Tips and Inspiration' started by crc3thebest, Jan 22, 2015.

  1. crc3thebest

    crc3thebest Community Champion

    The most effective way to help a friend with their addiction is to build them with positivity. Positive remarks on a day to day basis will build your friends self esteem where it needs to be. Now your friend may have the confidence needed to not give in to urges. As you show love and kindness to your friend, they will begin to love their self more. In a matter of time, they will forget they had an addiction.

    It is easy to say no when you know how great you are. Sometimes addiction becomes peer pressure. "Come on, you know you want it." Saying "No" when confronted can be hard after long periods of saying "Yes". Therefore, it is imperative to build a friends self esteem so they can be able to overcome the urges and say, "No".

    Confidence in one's self can take a person above and beyond their addiction. An addiction is something you give in and turn to on a day to day basis. Many find how they handle situations, identify how far their in an addiction. Does a person respond to bullying by fighting or caving in? A confident person would fight, meanwhile a non-confident person would give in.

    Your friend with confidence will be able to overcome the effects of their ailment. This includes remarks by others, failed relationships, peer pressure, and most of all their addiction. The key to helping your friend is love. Show them how amazing they are! At times addiction causes one to lose identity.

    Now, your friend is motivated to overcome their addiction. They know who they are, are what they represent, and what they stand for. The addiction is no longer "peer pressure" because they are in control. Your friend can soar like the expedient person they have always been. Constant positivity voided the addiction over time through promoting self-worth.
  2. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    It is right that addiction is sometimes due to peer pressure so it is important to have strong mind to not give into the pressure. I also agree that letting your friend know that someone cares and believes on him could make him help himself to fight against addiction.
  3. Tournique

    Tournique Senior Contributor

    Being there for your friend even if he is a bit distant and cold is gonna go long way. He will appreciate it as soon as he gets over these dark times.
  4. gmckee1985

    gmckee1985 Senior Contributor

    I think the most important thing besides being there for them emotionally is to be strong and honest enough to be hard on them when they need it. Relapses are going to happen but you have to let them know its not acceptable. You cant baby or coddle them.
  5. bluzkluz09

    bluzkluz09 Active Contributor

    Helping a friend sometimes means being straight with them. You might need to say something they may not be willing to hear. We can't sit by and allow them to hurt themselves and pretend that everything is ok. Sometimes being a friend means telling them that what they are doing is hurting themselves and they need to stop. Some people will get angry and even break the friendship. A true friend who cares will be patient but truthful as well as offer support. I appreciate honesty from my friends. Even when they are brutally honest. I might get angry initially but once I reflect back on what they said I try to apologize. I wouldn't want to change myself just because they say so but I do listen and try to see if there is truth in what they say.
  6. valiantx

    valiantx Community Champion

    There's no one way or method to helping any of one's friend(s) with a drug addiction, but I opinion being honest in your intention and advice is a must. Drug addicts don't want to hear another human's dishonest opinions or lack of care counseling, because he/she already has that type of mentality brewing in their own minds! I believe combining a drug addicted friend's thesis, with your anti-thesis, and combining both perspective called synthesis, has a higher probability to changing one's friend's attitude and life for the better. Most people who do drugs isn't because of their bad experiences in life or the world is unfair, it's their low-esteem and negative attitudes about their experiences! I know for a fact, there are billions of humans are worst off than drug addicts, heck, those billions of worst off humans worry about what they will eat and drink next, they don't even have the luxury of doing nor think of drugs!!!
  7. LitoLawless

    LitoLawless Senior Contributor

    I think the best way to help your friend is to let them know that you will always be there for them. You can't physically make them stop taking drugs, but you can let them know how you feel about them doing drugs. You should let them know that you will be there for them no matter what though.
  8. mkCampbell

    mkCampbell Active Contributor

    I have a friend that is constantly in need, or that's been his way for the last many years. He's why I joined this forum - to find out a few ways to help him as I was getting tired of being a crutch. But, if a friend needs help then I was raised to offer a hand. What I've learned is that eventually he will have to decide to get better himself. I can still offer help but I can't let his decisions, addictions, problems overwhelm my own life or cause my family harm. I'll always be there for him but some things are off the table such as more bail money etc. A ride to AA or something... yes.
  9. ryan0039

    ryan0039 Active Contributor

    I completely agree. That's why I am being very gentle and kind to my mother, as hard as that might be for both of us because I think part of her knows that I am pushing myself a little bit past the truth, but us fighting has only ever made it worse on both our ends. She would go back to the bottle and I'd have to go get stitches. It's hard to be kind and positive with someone who has hurt you so many times, though.