Here is my story. I have survived three relationships where some kind of substance abuse was involved. I had been physically abused, verbally abused, financially stripped, on the verge of homelessness, bible thumped, almost killed twice - just to name a few. I didn't feel that I could contribute to this forum and unsubscribed. It just kept nagging and nagging at me though - that maybe - just maybe I do have something to share. When I read Nick and Dancinglady's replies that changed my mind and I subscribed again. So, here's my story.... My first encounter with substance abuse (which we back then just called drinking too much) happened when I was 18. I didn't think anything about it until things got worse. Abuse, neglect, even trying to get me to prostitute. No way was I going to do that. I almost lost my life twice at this time. Once by almost being thrown in a river and the other time seeing headlights of a car coming straight at us. I survived only to go into another relationship a two years later. My second encounter was strictly because of loneliness. This wasn't alcohol addiction though. I never really found out what it was but it was not to my liking at all. I was controlled so bad it was sickening. Abused verbally and bible thumped to a point that I actually did get sick. We got evicted but did find a place from which I ran away from. I knew I had to do something. I stayed with a cousin for a couple days not wanting to go back - and then I heard a voice say "Go back home." Truly, loud and clear. I was scared but I went back. Nothing had changed and then one night there was a banging at my door. Police! Oh my God. They search they apartment and found him hiding in the bedroom closet and dragged him out. I was told later that he was part of a safecracking ring. I'll never forget that night. I couldn't go back to sleep my youngest son said "Mom, just forget him." I wish it could have been that easy. It didn't end there. I received several bible thumping letters from him after he was sent to prison. That stopped once I moved and the house was later demolished. My last and final encounter is with a loveable recovering alcohol. Yes we first had our battles but you know what God was definitely in this with us. He just never really had any support and always hung around other users he called friends. Every time something good happened to him they would just draw him right back into drinking and drugging. I almost lost him. He woke up and wanted to kiss me and I like freaked out big time. The smell was so awful. I knew something was really, really wrong. At the hospital the doctor told him that he only had two months if he kept going the way he was. They kept him and he agreed to go through rehab. I only visited him once during that time but we talked a lot on the phone. He has come so far and I am so proud of him. He has received his associate degree in substance abuse and got offered and accepted a position as a counselor at a rehab facility. Yes I am a survivor. God knew that I would be.