@Looking4betterdays... Welcome to the community and thank you for sharing with us. I'm so sorry for the loss you've had to deal with in your life. My heart goes out to you.
I'm happy to hear that you want to get off of the Xanax you've been taking for so long. Yes, inpatient rehab would be your best option. But if you can't do that for whatever reason, I think seeing an addiction specialist would be a great alternative. Addiction specialists can assess your particular situation and recommend the best next steps for you. They are thoroughly trained in all aspects of addiction and know way more about it than any "regular" doctor. They can also help you taper off the Xanax.
If you're in the United States, you can search for an addiction specialist in your area by using the "Find a Doctor" tool on the American Board of Addiction Medicine's website. Here's that link:
https://www.abam.net/find-a-doctor/
Xanax and other benzos are terrible drugs. I know because I took Klonopin for a long time and it was hell to get off of it. But I was able to taper off of it verrrry slowly and avoid major withdrawal issues. I think you could do the same, my friend.
We are here for you. If you need help, support, or just a place to vent, you can come back here anytime. And, if you'd like, we will be more than happy to be part of your support network on your journey to recovery. So don't hesitate to reach out, okay?
Sending you lots of love, light, hope, and encouragement. You
can do this,
@Looking4betterdays. I
know you can.
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