So, I'm in a strange place..I went to therapy about a year ago for alcohol after I got my 2nd DUI..I met a heroin addict in outpatient therapy, we became friends and eventually had a relationship over the next year. She fell in love, or she said and I pushed her away. I had hoped she would stay sober and get on her feet, that's what I wanted, I did not want to have to always have to help her. I cared for her but did not show her the way I could or should have. I broke it off and she spiraled into using again, meth and heroin. She got involved with a drug dealer, who is her "boyfriend" now. I've seen her a couple times over the last few months and she has lost weight and she gave her 2 young girls to her Aunt in California. Before she met this guy, she had wanted to stay with me and wanted us together, I cared about her but I did not want the burden of helping someone and their kids, while trying to get better myself, working, going to school and taking care of my own kids. The irony is, I want her in my life and she is with this guy and using heavily, but I know what I should be doing. I feel empty at times and wish I would have done more, I don't know if it's love or guilt or maybe the fact that she does not want to be with me anymore. She has told me that he beats her and treats her badly, but she stays and I understand this as I have seen it many times before. I offered to have her stay with me until she can sober up and she almost did, but at the last minute she opted not. I drove to where she stays, to try and talk to her in person, but she saw me and told her new guy I was there, so I left. I was upset, don't know if it was because she took another man's side or because I feel like she has given up on life and it was partly my fault. I know what I need to do, but I wanted to vent and let this out, hoping for some relief. So, thanks for listening and for those of you who are in tough situations, stay strong and don't give up. There are people that care and you will go through hurt, but keep your head high.