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I need help. Teenage substance abuse.

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by dimehead666, Mar 25, 2017.

  1. dimehead666

    dimehead666 Member

    Hello, I don't know how to start this off, so I'll just get right into it. I'm a 16 year old male. I have 2 siblings, an older brother and a younger sister. My parents are both alcoholics. I first used a substance in early freshman year of highschool. It was all casual at first you know, I was just smoking weed and I loved it. So much that I did it every single day just getting blasted out of my mind. I continued doing that for the next year and a half or more. Throughout that time, I feel that my mental state has deteriorated. I stay in my room all day and all night. I don't sleep until 7am and often not at all. Most days I only eat 1 meal. My family doesn't care about me, they don't pay attention to me. Every single night my dad drinks a six pack of beer or two, and my mom a bottle of wine or two. All they care about is getting to the end of the day so they can get their beer and wine into their system and go to sleep after. They don't care if the kids eat, not even my 12 year old sister. And I'm talking about them because they have a profound effect on me and my behaviour. I don't know why I do but I steal beer and wine from them whenever I can. I get caught most of the time and it really does make me feel horrible and worthless the way they talk to me about it. I only come out of my room at night when everybody is asleep so I don't have to deal with the horror of confrontation. I believe that this home life anxiety and depression and just disgusting way of living has been at least partially caused by my prolonged use of cannabis and alcohol. I seriously want change, but I cannot change myself. My room also is a mess. It looks like something out of hoarders. Trash evwrywhere. I just have no motivation. I have existential crisis feelings all the time. I just don't know what to do or how to help myself with no support. Every night I think of ending my life because of the way I'm living. It is unhealthy, it is filthy, it is miserable. I have no friends except the ones who I get high with and we only hang out to get high. I left public school to do school online which makes me stay in my room even more. And gives me more time to take shrooms, smoke weed, drink, etc. I just want to stop feeling this way, but the only way I can get away from it all is by getting high. Which only makes everything worse. How can live a happy, sober, and successful life???
  2. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @dimehead666... Welcome to the community and thanks for sharing your story with us. I'm sorry that you're struggling. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you and it's great that you're wanting to change yourself for the better.

    I'm wondering if you've ever tried talking to a therapist. When my son was struggling with his addiction, therapy helped him immensely. (FWIW, he also had some of the other issues you mentioned you have.) A lot of times a therapist can help you discover and confront the underlying issues of your questionable behavior. When that happens, it can make changing much easier. A therapist can also maybe help you with your addiction issues. So maybe consider trying therapy.

    I would also suggest trying to change some of the things in your life one step at a time. To try and fix everything at once might be overwhelming, so why not just concentrate on one thing at a time? Like maybe try cleaning up your room, and do your best to keep it that way. Sometimes changing your environment or surroundings can have a profound affect on your behavior. I would also suggest getting out of your room more. Make it a point to take some time to get outside and go for a walk or a bike ride or something.

    Change is never easy. But if you try taking baby steps in the right direction, it can make change less difficult. Even baby steps will eventually get you to where you want to be. Shoot for progress, not perfection.

    I'm sending you lots of positive vibes and encouragement. You can make positive changes to your life. I know you can.