I'm already going downhill. I'm drinking every night, sometimes getting black out drunk. I'm abusing pills, smoking weed and it's starting to effect me different, and I've been doing cocaine. My family doesn't know, or at least doesn't know how bad it is. And I'd rather them not know until I actually start getting help. It's gotten to the point where I've stopped caring about certain things. I quit my job, knowing that I have bills to pay, and my car absolutly needs repaired asap because it doesn't work at all. I'm digging myself a hole and I'm scared I won't be able to get out. Any words of encouragement, advice, etc would be appreciated. I'm hoping my a friend of mine is picking me up tonight so I can talk to her about it and possibly even get the treatment started. I don't want to live like this. But it's a Sunday and it's getting later in the evening and the only 2 places open for evaluation and treatment close around 9 or 10. I also have a question. The pills I have been abusing are benzos. Out of all of the things I listed above, the pills, alcohol, and cocaine, could I be getting withdrawals from those and if so what are they like? Because I've been puking once in a while. And I'm not sick. My aggression is starting to show, I can sleep for hours when I'm not on anything, and I even caught myself thinking about just ending it all so I don't have to deal with this. Please, just opinions, advice, words of encouragement. I'm desperate to talk to someone (that isn't family) about this.