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I try not to care...but he needs help

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by True concern, Oct 13, 2018.

  1. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    So after my relapse a little over a month ago my uncle left the home and went on a major Meth binge lasting about 5 week's, he returned 2 day's ago,lost approximately 20lbs,covered in dirt a filth,hadn't showered once the entire time and his mind was slipping but being awake for 5 week's will do that.The ground rules were laid out again."No Dope Allowed PERIOD In Our Home"and I could see the depression and worthlessness he felt on his face,I am unable to hate or not help even after what I've been through with him so I got him some clean clothes,told him to shower,made him a place to sleep,and have been making sure he eats 3-4 time's a day and after he just sleeps and probably will for 7-10 day's. I try not to care,I try not to let it eat at me...but it does so again he gets another chance to recover but this time will be a little different as his probation officer is on him about having to much spare time and now that she is hip to what's going on he has no choice but to get his sh*t together or go back to jail so he gets another chance with me and my family however if he goes back to the dope now he goes back to jail so I hope this will help him stay on track this time as I only want the best for him but at the same time he must help himself.Caring is tough
    Last edited: Oct 14, 2018
    Dominica likes this.
  2. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    Arthur... You have such a big heart, my friend. It would be so easy for you to just not give a sh*t about your uncle after all he's done to disrupt the lives of you and your family. But look at you: You care! Not because you have to...but because you want to. That's an amazing thing, and it's just another reason why I think you're such a wonderful human being.

    I hope your uncle can stay on the right path. It's probably a blessing in disguise that his probation officer is going to be watching him closely now. Let's hope so.
    Dominica and True concern like this.
  3. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    Thank You for the kind word's and unfortunately I found chunks of crystal meth on the bathroom counter yesterday where my family brushes their teeth,I scrapped it up and cleaned the counter and showed it to my mom so that she could see I wasn't luring and I left with my brother so my mom could talk to him one on one about the danger he put the entire family in especially my 7 year old sister as she could have accidentally got it on her hand and kids are always putting their fingers in or around their mouths so anyways as my mom was trying to talk to him he didn't apologize or anything he just grabbed his key's and walked out the door.Today I am folding up all his blankets and moving all his thing's to one section of the home and as of now both myself and my mom are just waiting for him to be violated by his PO as he told my mom he has multiple dirty drug test so now he is gone and my family has to wait for the Sheriff's to come search our home for him.Its hard to care for a person who doesn't care about us
    Dominica and deanokat like this.
  4. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @True concern hey there. you truly do have a good soul, and there's no shame in that. also great to have boundaries, which you do. your uncle is lost...and addict...sick...and i do hope one day he will reach out for help. jail may be his ticket to freedom, if he can get some help there.

    meanwhile, you keep taking care of you....and upholding the boundaries in your home. i know it's not easy to watch a loved one destroy himself and put others in danger.... it takes one with a higher consciousness to be able to put the personal aside and do the kind thing... and you do. kudos for that.

    keep doing what you're doing arthur! so proud of you...and happy to be on this life journey with you!
    deanokat and True concern like this.