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I want to stop

Discussion in 'Methamphetamine / Meth' started by JGG, May 1, 2016.

  1. JGG

    JGG Member

    Im 23 years old.
    It started with adderall in 2013 then in 2014 someone gave me what I thought was coke.
    I been snorting meth for 2 years now on and off. I have stayed clean for months or weeks at a time then anxiety creeps in.

    I start a new job or I feel like I want to be more bubbly in a specific situation I impulsively go back to it. Its superficial reasons really. I fear that I dont know how to deal with life now since I fall back into it when im feeling stressed out or low in self esteem. I feel i have grown with it like a childhood friend. Does anyone else feel this way? Do you have any words of advice?

    Im currently feeling numb and I hate this non emotion but I just dont want to go back and I cant talk to my friends they cant relate.
  2. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @JGG... Welcome to the community and thanks for sharing with us. I'm sorry to hear about your struggles with meth. One thing I might suggest, if you haven't tried it already, is counseling. I think it may be able to help you cope with your stress and get over your self-esteem issues. And those could very well be the root causes of why you feel inclined to use.

    There's nothing wrong with asking for help. Always remember that. Since you've stayed clean for weeks or months at a time, you know you can do it. I think you just need to find ways to deal with the reasons you go back to using. I think therapy could make a huge difference.

    We're here to help and support you however we can. Reach out anytime you feel the need.

    tbrown likes this.
  3. JustinSane87

    JustinSane87 Member

    Hey jgg I know exactly what ur goin thru brother. Except my addiction is opiates. I have gotten clean several times as well. Sometimes for months at a time but somehow always go back. I was a daily user for 8 years. I have been clean for 5 months now and just got custody of my son whose mom struggles with addiction as well. staying sober is a lifelong commitment I wake up everyday with that urge to get high still. the main thing for me was who I surrounded myself with I couldn't quit as long as I was around it all the time. getting custody love my son and surrounding myself with non-users has made staying sober a lot easier. you just have to want it for yourself mainly and try to surround yourself with positive people. and find something you're passionate about and try to dedicate yourself to doing whatever that is instead of getting high. like I said though it is a lifelong struggle and only those of us who have been there know what it's really like. so good luck my friend and I'm here if you have any questions or just need to talk sometimes
    tbrown and deanokat like this.
  4. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @JGG... How are you doing, my friend? Let us know if we can be of help. We're here for you.
  5. Zyni

    Zyni Community Champion

    I hate to see you in such pain. You have so much life ahead of you, and it can be a great life. Really.

    I hope you can get the help you need. Have you considered a support group? Since you noted that your friends can't relate, this might be helpful. You'd be able to talk to other people who fully understand, because they are or were in the same situation. It helps to know you're not alone and that others really do "get it," because they've been there (or are there).
  6. cammy

    cammy Member

    @JGG sounds exactly like what I have going on. I did meth for the first time a little over a year ago. Someone told me it was coke. I was blackout drunk so I didn't realize it wasn't until they told me. I went on a I think 3 day binge. I continued use for about 2 more months. Then my friend I was using with went to rehab and I stopped for a couple weeks. Decided I wanted to lose weight so I started using again for a few months. Stopped again eventually for about 2.5 months. I went back home to ny to visit for christmas and when I left I was really depressed. I missed everyone in ny more than ever. That's when I started using again in mid January and I've been high every day since. Yesterday my ex bf found some drugs in my purse. He called my dad. Cats out of the bag now. I know I need to stop. Both of my parents are offering to help in any way they can. My dad actually emailed a link to this site to me. I'm not entirely sure where to begin. I've been high every day for months. I'm gonna feel like death when I come down. I don't have insurance or money for any type of therapy either. Does anyone have advice on where to begin? Thanks
  7. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener


    If your parents are offering to help you any way they can, perhaps they could be a resource if you need funds for treatment/therapy?

    If not, and if you're in the U.S., the SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) website can be a great starting point. They have a treatment locator tool that can help you find low-cost or no-cost treatment. Here's the link:

    You could also look into your local Salvation Army locations, too. Many offer free detox/treatment.

    Reach out anytime you need help or support. We're here for you.

    Sending you positive, clean & sober vibes and hugs of hope and encouragement.
  8. morjoannee

    morjoannee Member

    Get a hold of your nearest church or on your own research look into nearest meetings. Also, Researching your options will educate more . Independently focus on what it is you want apart frometh. Be grateful for what you DO have and gain your self respect. Do you want to quit but can't because of your environment, will power, or what is your main pull back to using. Find a counselor and most important. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. Let go of the stigma confidence. Others will judge you and treat you as if the stigma is evident even after it is not. Don't expect that to change. Don't let it in eithet. They will think as they wish, your in this for you and trust me every baby step DOES count . You can do can quit it. Because you are you. Good luck and I will be praying for ya..
    deanokat likes this.