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I Wrote an Article About Being An Abused Child

Discussion in 'Helping an Addicted Loved One' started by hellonamesdana, Nov 2, 2015.

  1. hellonamesdana

    hellonamesdana Senior Contributor

    Hi Guys,

    I don't know if I'm writing this in the right thread, but I wanted to get it out there. I wrote an article for my job at about how being abused as a child still continues to affect me in my adult life. It had a lot of controversy from my friends and family, but I wrote it from the heart and I felt really good writing about my adult life.

    Here's the article:

    I'd really love it if you guys gave it a read and then let me know how you felt about it.
  2. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @hellonamesdana... Thanks for sharing your article with us. It was so honest and powerful. And I commend you for staying away from alcohol. It is soooo overrated.

    Thanks again for sharing. I'm glad you're here!
  3. xTinx

    xTinx Community Champion

    That was very brave of you to share what you've been through. Don't worry about family and friends who aren't thrilled to read your confession. What's important is that you've let it out. Telling others, who may or may not empathize with you, is a very liberating act. You did the write thing. Rest assured, the rest of us here support you. Others who read your story may find the courage to share theirs too.
  4. MichelleVL

    MichelleVL Senior Contributor

    Hi Hellonamesdana. I'm sorry to hear what you had to go through growing up. I really don't know what I can say to comfort you, but maybe telling you my friends story might help.

    My best friend is 32 years old now, but was both sexually and emotionally abused by her uncle from the ages of 6 through 8. She never told her mother until this summer. She never planned on telling anyone in her family due to shame and for fear of not being understood. What prompted her to speak up was that she noticed that the uncle that had abused her, was starting to show unnecessary attention to her 5 year old daughter. My friend's mom was devastated because she wished she would have known, she wished she would 0f been there for her.

    Now in a way I think that in a way you have faired better than her. What I mean is that although you notice how your abusive relationship has affected you, you have tried to move past it in a positive way. You have taken a very negative situation and are doing positive things with it, and are trying to become a better person than your mother was precisely because of what you went through and because you know what you don't want to become.

    My friend is also weary of people just like you, but in her case it borders on the verge of paranoia. She feels like people are always trying to harm her, ruin her life or sabotage whet ever projects she is trying to develop. Many people have suffered by her hand due to her unjust accusations. Even though she is weary of people, she somehow ends up in toxic relationships and has been physically and emotionally abused (rapes, beatings, insults) by partners she has had in the past and she just sticks right in there. She remains under the abuse as long as possible. She also drinks heavily specially during the weekends and sometimes has a few drinks during work hours. It has been about a year since her last abusive relationship, and a month or two after the relationship ended she became highly promiscuous and at the moment has multiple sex partners, despite of the fact that after her encounters with them, she feels guilty and dirty.

    I studied psychology for several years (but didn't finish) and think that maybe she is trying to punish herself for what happened to her as a kid, and maybe holds herself responsible for what happened to her. I've often advised her to seek out psychological help in order to better handle situations and what seems like deep rooted issues, but she becomes offended. If you ever feel the need to, do not be scared or ashamed to seek help. The help is there to help us become equipped to handle our problems better, and to discover what might be wrong within us, but do not know. So do so.
    deanokat likes this.
  5. MichelleVL

    MichelleVL Senior Contributor

    Again, I'm proud of you, and I applaud you for your strength, for having courage, and for using your situation to make good life choices. You are young but you are wise, and the world would be a lot better with people like you in it. Stay strong, and determined just as you are. A big hug to you girl.
    deanokat likes this.
  6. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    Thank you for sharing your article with us. It was written from the heart and I could feel your pain in your words. You are a very good writer. I am so sorry that you had to go through this as a child. No child deserves to be abused. No child should have to look back on their childhood and remember such terrible things. I also commend you on staying away from alcohol. You can have a social life and have fun without drinking.
    deanokat likes this.
  7. KNH

    KNH Active Contributor

    Thank you for sharing your story. Your posts are always insightful and meaningful. You are very courageous and smart, and I am sure most young women are not near as strong as you are.
  8. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    @hellonamesdana, thank you so much for sharing your story to us here. That was very courageous of you. I have now come to realize that you are truly a strong young woman. I wish you all the best, and I hope in time, you'll be able to fight and beat all those demons inside your head.
  9. amin021023

    amin021023 Community Champion

    Since I was abused as a child, I know what it' like and how badly it can affect you even in adulthood...but life's too short to be upset about something that happened ages ago...
  10. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    Thanks for sharing your article on here and for sharing some part of your life. It is a brave thing to do and you can really be a motivation. These kind of real life stories are inspiring and informative.
  11. cpinatsi

    cpinatsi Senior Contributor

    Nice article. Being abused as a child can really affect people for the rest of their lives, that is why it s so important to stop this whenevr we see this happening and not pretend like it is not our business as it usually happening.