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IF YOU KNOW ME AND HAVE BEEN THERE FOR ME READ THIS JUST IN CASE.

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by True concern, Nov 1, 2018.

  1. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    So I have to start by saying I don't know who or why,I am trying to change my life and at the same time I just want a chance to LIVE and take care of my family,myself, help other's, and make amends.I understand that there are probably people out there who would like to harm me and though I've struggled with addiction for many year's I have never takin anyone's life,and I don't plan on it.I said earlier I was not going to N/A tonight so that I could rest my knee,however I decided last minute that I was going to go.I live in an apartment and the family vehicle is parked underneath a carport,let me add I come from a family of auto mechanics and have built many custom car's myself,it's a family trade craft and we are very over qualified for all thing's vehicle.We have built thousands of engine's and built hundreds of car's from the frame up,body,engine,transmission, drive train,fuel systems,hydraulic braking set ups,heating,cooling,suspension, ailgnment,etc Full blown gear head's. Tonight someone used specialty tool's to get into our vehicle,they did not attempt to steal it nor did they do any obvious damage,however what was done was intentional and it was meant to kill me in what should have been a fiery auto explosion.It was done here on the property where I live because though the vehicle was driven prior today the gas hand was moving at a normal rate.After the vehicle was parked 45 minutes later I got in the vehicle and headed towards my N/A meeting, very quickly I started smelling gas,I checked the common wear and tear items,gas cap o-ring,injector o-rings,fuel lines under the vehicle to the fuel pump that over time get brittle crack and leak..it was none of these thing's so I thought maybe I'm smelling gas from a car around me or in front of me so I took of driving again,well I noticed the fuel hand was now rapidly dropping so I made a u-turn and hauled ass back home at a high rate of speed to keep the fuel pressure high in the injectors and prayed that I could maintain speed before the pressure became unstable and detonated the vehicle, by the grace of God I made it home although when I popped the hood the second time I saw the impossible, someone had removed the nut to the fuel rail which requires a special tool to get into the location of the rail without removing several other components,the intake manifold was full of fuel as well as the spark plug tubes,overflowing with more than ten gallons of raw fuel,my dad a professional of over 50 year's in the trade and an independent mechanic both looked and confirmed what I already knew,this was done to look like mechanical failure but if those spark plugs had been 1/8th a turn loosened the spark would have blown the vehicle up with me in it,if one wire had a slight gash the vehicle would have exploded.Someone has targeted me,and I imagine they will try again. I am telling you all this for one reason alone.If I suddenly stop coming to this site,say I don't post for two days straight then it's possible I may not be around anymore.If that happens please remember the progress I've made and know that I truly do love you all and appreciate everything you all have done to help me.This is not a prank nor a sick twisted joke,I plan on coming to this site every day,and I'm not going to LIVE in fear,if this journey cost me my life at least it will be with me trying to make peace with the world and myself.So this happened and here I am bearing my soul in a place I feel safe,with people I trust.Pray for me,I'm not done fighting yet and this one I really don't want to lose.Take Care My Family You've All Been Amazing. Thank You
  2. Dominica

    Dominica Author, Writer, Recovery Advocate Community Listener

    @True concern oh my gosh! that's crazy! i am so glad you were not injured. are you planning on reporting this to the police? i do hope that this will NOT happen again and that whoever this is will stop such behavior.

    and, you ARE making a difference and have been for a while now... so yes, you should be proud of yourself for this.

    please be on the lookout. i'm not sure how you can secure your vehicles.... but perhaps there is a way.

    i'll be praying for your safety.... for God's will to continue to come through your life....

    we love you!!!
    True concern likes this.
  3. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    No police report this time simply because there is no proof,no camera's, no witnesses. Odd thing though whoever it is lives in our apartment complex because our carport is next to all the water heaters for the entire apartments and whoever did it also turned off the pilot flame on the water heaters,I assume they are smart enough to realize that all those fuel vapors could have blown up a big section of the apartment complex if the vapor made it to the water heaters,so I assume it has to be someone who lives here as well and they must live fairly close to be concerned about the fuel vapor making it to the pilot light on the water heaters.The entire apartments have no hot water this morning. I will definitely keep my eyes open, unfortunately I always have my head on a swivel, I am trying to not be so suspicious of everything and everyone but after this incident I definitely feel the pressure and I obviously can't see everything every time.This couldn't happen at a worse time,but I can't let it ruin my goal,I just pray it stops but I have a feeling it's just getting started.
  4. Liolin

    Liolin Guest

    omg. I don't even know what to say except like Dominica that i am praying for your safety.
    keep posting!
    True concern likes this.
  5. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    I will continue to post,as long as I'm here.My worry is one which I feel is justified, if they went this far they are bound to try something else. This puts a lot of stress on me(as if I don't have enough)and I just started working N/A meetings regularly and I could very well be sitting in the same room with whom ever as it's a big group and 3-4 new people started hitting the same meetings at the same time's, could it be paranoia?Absolutely it could be but I can't help it someone tried to kill me and they put serious thought into their first attempt as it would have looked like unfortunate mechanical malfunction. The thought they put into it worries me more than anything because it illustrates their level of commitment to get away with it and make it look like an accident. I am torn in all honesty,"Keep my family safe"is my top priority and maybe the way to keep them safe is for me to leave,but I don't know I'm just saddened that NOW, with my heart,mind,and soul focused on being a man of compassion, concern,and grace of all time's to hurt me someone wants to do it now.I refuse to hate,no more...i won't do it for anyone for any reason. I want to be a good person, I want to help other's, I want to show healing is possible, recovery is possible, I am just very sad.I cannot be my addiction, I refuse even if it cost me my life.I am just very sad
    Dominica likes this.
  6. deanokat

    deanokat DrugAbuse.com Community Organizer Community Listener

    @True concern... Wow. That's some scary stuff. I'm no expert on things like this, but I think you should file a police report regardless. I think the police should be aware of this, even if you have no hard evidence. Maybe they could, at the very least, step up patrols of your area at night. Please be careful, my friend!

    You are a blessing to everyone here, that's for sure. And I am praying for your safety, too.
    True concern and Dominica like this.
  7. Dominica

    Dominica Author, Writer, Recovery Advocate Community Listener

    @True concern I'm sorry you are sad.... I think that's understandable. I pray that the person has a change of heart...or God intervenes some way, so you won't have to worry a lick, ok?

    :)

    God is on your side...and we pray divine protection over you and your family!
    deanokat and True concern like this.
  8. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    You know when I was using I put on this tough guy persona,I acted like I was invincible, impervious to pain or fear,I told stories that were complete bullshit because I wanted other's to fear me,I have no idea who this could be, it happened shortly after my uncle left after sleeping off another meth binge,but in my heart I don't think it was him but also he came in with several electronic item's, a nice canon camera,a working newer laptop and I don't know if he is doing the hacking of my families device's or if he is carrying around laptops with hacks already in them that somehow let whoever is linked to them get our access,but the same day earlier I use my brothers phone to come on here and this is literally the only site I visit period,but after he came in as I logged into here I noticed 6 other apps were open all of them were Google gmail privacy changes,password changes,recovery changes and none of it came from myself or my brother and I am not good enough to fix these thing's whoever did that was getting the recovery code faster than I could fix it so someone I don't know,none of us know now own the original email to my account here,they got my blog which is why I don't do that anymore,they got my brothers email ,etc and that same night I almost got blown up...This all sounds like pure lunacy but it's not and it is very frustrating and I'm not that bullshit tough guy persona,yes I can be ruthless...when necessary to protect myself and my family but I am not even suggesting I'm unstoppable, I am not trying to even give that impression and this I guess is what people mean when they say "your past can come back to haunt you"even though 99%of those unbelievable stories were unbelievable because they never happened. For ten month's I have been completely honest and that's the truth but 10 month's out of 37 year's isn't much but it's progress.My uncle asked me if I would go with him to a meeting Thursday to my surprise, I said absolutely then he left and Thursday became one of the scariest day's in my life since I have started changing my life and he up and left 45 minutes before it all started happening. But in my heart I don't think it's him,I do however believe someone wants me to think it is.These puzzles are insane,I just want normality, I'm tired of feeling like I'm in the middle of some damn evil conspiracy or whatever the hell this is,I pray whoever it is trying to harm me finds their own inner peace,I pray they see this is wrong,and I pray they are safe and get to go home to a loving family every night.I just want peace
    deanokat and Dominica like this.
  9. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    Yes,ok.

    I will try my best not to worry,I don't even seek vengeance on whomever it is,that's the old me...vengeance is not my job,and hate is no longer in my heart,I pray whomever it is is happy,comfortable, and safe at home with their family, I pray if I have wronged them in some way they can find forgiveness in their heart,who ever it is I forgive them,even though I feel I'm still in danger.I just want a chance, at peace,love,and happiness
    deanokat and Dominica like this.
  10. Dominica

    Dominica Author, Writer, Recovery Advocate Community Listener

    @True concern very odd about the phone.... jeesh, like you don't have enough going on right????

    i hope it is not your uncle too!!

    try to have a good weekend, my friend. i hope it is calm....and joyful....and that you can relax some...

    will be thinking of ya'll!!!
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  11. deanokat

    deanokat DrugAbuse.com Community Organizer Community Listener

    Thinking of your this morning, @True concern. I hope you have a safe, uneventful day.
    Dominica and True concern like this.
  12. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    Thank you,me too. I am taking a few day's off even from N/A to focus on icing my knee so the selling will go down as that's what my Dr said to do so I will trust them over me right now
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  13. deanokat

    deanokat DrugAbuse.com Community Organizer Community Listener

    Self-care is a wonderful thing, Arthur. :)
    True concern likes this.
  14. deanokat

    deanokat DrugAbuse.com Community Organizer Community Listener

    @True concern... Happy Monday. How's your knee, buddy? And have you seen any more signs of people messing with your car or anything? I hope not. Let us know how things are when you get a chance.
    Dominica and True concern like this.
  15. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    My knee is getting there I think,as the swelling goes down thing's move,re settle in different positions so at time's it's more painful than before but I am trying to just take it slow,not take off running even though my mind is screaming RUN lol,the car hasn't been messed with anymore that I'm aware of, definitely not about to burst into a ball of fire anyways,I pray that whoever did it won't again but my parent's have finally decided to put my uncle out once he returns,he has owed dad 160 dollars for over 4 month's now and keeps spending every penny on meth,unfortunately he will cause problems once he hears the news but if he does mom already said she will call his PO as he has left no choice.Happy Monday to you my friend have a wonderful day
    Dominica likes this.
  16. deanokat

    deanokat DrugAbuse.com Community Organizer Community Listener

    Glad the knee is feeling better. Do you still think it's infected? Also glad you/your car haven't burst into a ball of fire. LOL. Let's hope that doesn't happen, okay?! Lastly, while I'm sure it's probably going to involve a mix of emotions, I have to say I'm happy to hear that your parents have decided to have your uncle leave. I think it will result in a much better living environment for you guys. I'm proud of your parents for making this decision!

    Happy Monday right back at ya, Arthur!!! :)
    Dominica and True concern like this.
  17. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    I'm totally ok with NOT bursting into a fireball lol,sometimes I describe thing's which are serious in a humorous way...I suppose it is how I make lite of thing's, but they stress me out otherwise. I don't think my knee is infected anymore,I am counting down until I can run for sure 3 week's and counting lol.
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  18. Dominica

    Dominica Author, Writer, Recovery Advocate Community Listener

    @True concern

    Hey there! I'm glad that you're doing alright and no one's messing with you! Our prayers are working! I'm glad that you are off of your knee and letting it heal. 3 more weeks...that is not a long time! You still working out otherwise?

    That is good news about your uncle. I do hope that he can find another place to stay and not bother you all anymore. You and your folks deserve to live in a drama-free, drug free home.

    I hope your Monday is going well and that you're enjoying some nice fall weather. :D
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  19. True concern

    True concern Community Champion

    I have not been to the gym in awhile, 4-5day's, I want to go more but just lifting my leg that high to get in the vehicle causes a lot of pain (SUV)So I have been focusing on my knee.I hope you have had a wonderful day and I hope you have a great evening
    deanokat and Dominica like this.
  20. Dominica

    Dominica Author, Writer, Recovery Advocate Community Listener

    @True concern Then I'm glad you're resting!!! Think about the big picture here, yes..... When it's completely healed, you'll be a workout maniac!! In balance, right????? :rolleyes:
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