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I'm having several issues & it's bringing me Waaay down.

Discussion in 'Share Your Detox Experience' started by Davers, Dec 22, 2019.

  1. True concern

    True concern Moderator


    @Davers I read about your cat and I understand, "LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY"..... However sir I have to say...Never question you're ability to hold onto faith!You will keep you're faith,you will be grateful, you will thank god!!I know because we are the same and I look at my kitty and want to punch her. .not because I don't love her but perhaps because she loves me more than I feel I'm worth...I think you get it!!!Stay Strong Brother, and just so you know 2 months ago I advocated for you to be promoted to a moderator but we aren't heard anymore...I love you brother and truly appreciate you picking up my slack...i was here DAILY for over 2 years,responding to EVERYONE and in the end they all vanished yet I continue to check in and won't stop...Thanks again Brother God Be With You and I'm sorry about Marble Man..Truely.
    Davers likes this.
  2. Davers

    Davers Community Champion

    Thanks Man .
    It'really mean's A-LOT!

    Please don't worry about me losing my faith , cause if I have not by now , I ,likely never will , but I also think 'never say never ' but I really do believe if I were put into the position were a Terriost groug , or some Guru held me at gun point saying ' denounce your faith or die' I say kill me . Tho I would have to experience that to know for sure , as Peter said to Jesus he would never deny him , but did 3 times that nighr before the crucifixion .
    Really other tham my Son , & wife (most times) LOL my Faith is all I got .

    Yes my cat's are my childern as well , yesterday was hard but with the Lords help it went better than I was expecting , the Vet's were awesome , caring , & helpful , I was the only one to be able to be with him cause of this 'Covid thing ' he was ready , & I been praying for the last 5-6 weeks for the Lord to let me know the right time to give him relief of his suffering , it' was most difficult cause he would still eat and drink but not that much and still want to love and recognized us when we talked to him , but the last 3 day's it was apparent that he was falling faster as he was starting to seek out places to hide & be alone & would let out his sweet meow from time to time ,
    To much Info / TMI maybe ? but for the last 2 years since we got Buddy as a kitten in March 2018 , he had basically stayed with my wife & Son in their room ( that situation is another story ) :confused: Then slept with me & his Mom , until She passed in summer 2018 from cancer , they really looked alike except fuzzy was 'well ' ' fuzzyer' but they had the same sweet eyes . the stayed with me up till the last month or so , he got tired of me giving him medicine , & me using a flea comb to get those Dam bugs off him , I got OCD with it at times . BUT I'm glad he was able to spend time with them for his last month or more & my son really bonded with him .
    I choose to bury my pets , so I had dug his spot out on Monday , beside his Mom , Cousins , so I did not have to do that in 89 o heat & humidity yesterday afternoon , it still took me 2 house cause of my perfectionism / OCD but he / they are worth it .
    Afterward there was a since of relief , not only for Marble Man / M & M , Marble Beast , My friend + whatever nickname came to mind & stuck .:) but for our small family as we don't have to see him struggle to get comfortable everyday. In short the Lord comforted & consoled me.

    I hope your kitty stays healthy & keep being your support & you his / hers , it is a very special bond.

    Forgive my long post , but I want to address all that you said.
    I may even have to post another reply cause of the 'to many characters thing'.
    Ill do that now.
  3. Davers

    Davers Community Champion

    I agree we are very similar in our mind-set , I had to stop and listen to this song / video , as it comforts me JIC ill post a link tho I'm sure you know this song already ....
    Oh .. Thanks for thinking about me being a moderator , that gives me anxiety thinking about it LOL
    + I don't think i'd be a good one as I can only handle 3-5 hours in the mornings or when I wake before I have info overload , also I don't have or really want a I phone so i'd miss a-lot of posts I like trying to help or relate with others here & think every post ( even if most never return or rarely do ) deserves a reply & you can see I like to send out long detailed reply's :rolleyes: & I get sidetracked easily .
    As for most not listening you are correct as I have noticed that as well , but I guess it is what it is . I feel if someone is meant to read a certain post or reply they will see it eventually .
    It's also my opinion that certain members ( tho I could be wrong ) think that since I still take the Xanax & M-Done ( but don't abuse them ) that I'm not "Truly In Recovery" so my points are moot. IDK ?
    It can be disconcerting when people don't reply or answer certain questions but then again i'm not in their shoes so I try to let that stuff ride.

    I just turned 49 but in my mind I still feel 30-35 tho the body is not as good as it was then of-course . Heck I don't even know where the last 10-15 years went :eek:.

    IMO you are a great moderator & do very well while struggling with your own issues , I could never take your place , as I likely said before I'm only on 4 forums & this one mostly for the past 6 + months , it's easy to get burnt out on sites & hobbies but that natural even if it's somebody s Job & being paid is the main reason they are online , I know moderators don't get paid , JIC I sound that way .

    Guess I shut up for now , but I do appreciate your message it made me feel good .
    So I hope you have a Great Day / Night / Tomorrow / Stay Cool :cool: & Ill see you around .
    Davers / Davey
  4. Davers

    Davers Community Champion

    " Growing darkness taking dawn , I was me but now he's gone " ???
  5. Davers

    Davers Community Champion

    I'm feeling not right, thought I was getting better? BUT NO ?
    I blame no-one really .
    Am I Ready to Go ? .....Not Really

    I do want a way out tho .
    Not from life , just the mental & physical suffering .

    Guess we each have our demons.

    I don't blame God.

    Something "Broke" last Friday.?
    Never been this LOW!................IDK?

    No one here is able to communicate .

    Oh well , Ill stay on the horse for now .