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Is it true

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by Nickl, Mar 11, 2016.

  1. Nickl

    Nickl Member

    This girl that was a good friend of mine has been doing heroin for a long time. We started talking a while back and she claimed she was clean when she really wants. What is the realize she would hide this the hole time. We would talk about getting a house together. Keeping her on the right path. Then to find out she was using and prostituting herself for drugs and money.she told me she wanted her. She would say that she only uses to not get sick. Is that just her way of making her feel okay??
  2. darkrebelchild

    darkrebelchild Community Champion

    Addiction makes people do things that they wouldn't normally do. Your friend needs professional help and I don't see her quitting anytime soon unless you assist her.

    You will need to get help for her before you move in together since the addiction is making her lie, she may end up stealing from you to get substances. That could affect your relationship.
  3. Tremmie

    Tremmie Community Champion

    She is an addict, she doesn't even know what she is saying... as long as she is under the influence of the drugs she will be the worst version of herself. It's hard to deal with that, but most ex drug addicts can understand it. A drug addict becomes the most selfish person ever, only thinking about the next fix, not even caring about their own wellness... I should know because I was one.
  4. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    If you had a family member, a love one or a friend who is into addiction chances are you will have a life full of worries and no peace of mind when dealing with them while they are struggling for something. That is why if you are both planning in getting a house together think wisely with the decision that you might have and make it sure that your friend will confess to you the real truth about herself. If you can help her and she is willing to quit and will change her life then it is better.
  5. Nickl

    Nickl Member

    I haven't talked to her in two weeks. She said she wanted help. I was going to get her help. But then she jumped out of my truck and won't talk to me.
  6. MrsJones

    MrsJones Community Listener Community Listener

    @Hi Nickl. Your friend needs help and it sounds like she is trying to manipulate you by her actions so far. Knowing just what you have realized should put things on hold until she has voluntarily sought help with her addiction. You could be putting yourself at risk as well seeing that she has been sexually involved with others.

    I know these things may sound harsh but when helping someone who has an addiction it is best to know what you risks you are taking as well. There is no way to sugar coat an addiction and it's affects.
    Nickl likes this.
  7. Nickl

    Nickl Member

    Yeah I haven't talked to her in two weeks. I don't really see her ever getting help. I hope she does but she doesn't care enough about what she's doing. She thinks everyone that's trying to help her are the bad guys.. and yes I realize the health risks. Even if she gets completely clean one day and comes running to me. One I don't know if I'd allow her in my life and if I did I'd want her to get tested for and std.
    MrsJones likes this.
  8. kgord

    kgord Community Champion

    It is so hard to get clean and stay clean. Even the best intentions go awry. Like in the documentary I was watching last night, addicts find it hard to stay clean when something happens to disrupt their sobriety. They can end up in a very dark place. God forbid anyone ever stick a needle in their arm. It is a lose, lose situation.
    Nickl likes this.
  9. Nickl

    Nickl Member

    So basically I've learned it's better to walk away forever. I'm probably going to end up getting hurt again and again and again.
  10. knitmehere

    knitmehere Community Champion

    I think you've made the right choice to walk away from your friend. It really doesn't sound as though they are ready to admit they have a problem, and without that there is no way that they will be able to stop anytime soon, no matter how much you try to help them.
    Nickl likes this.
  11. Nickl

    Nickl Member

    Yeah I think I have to just walk away forever. I really think her addiction is going to kill her:( I can't stick around to find out. She's so bad she uses her kids makes them lie for her. Manipulates her kids. The oldest is 10 years old. These kids don't need this either.
  12. Mara

    Mara Community Champion

    I'm so sorry to hear that about your friend Nicki. You know, we can only do so much. No matter how much we try to help a person, if she will not help herself, then all our efforts will just be in vain. I think you made the right decision. There are people that we need to cut off from our lives, especially if they're making our lives miserable for us and all the people around us.
    Nickl likes this.
  13. Nickl

    Nickl Member

    It hurts to give up and walk away forever but it's for the better. She's very sick to where she doesn't even respect her self/body or her kids. I know this addiction is going to kill her it's just a matter of when:/
  14. Min

    Min Active Contributor

    I'm really sorry you had to watch someone you care about go through this, and I'm sorry you had to suffer in the process. It's never easy to make the decision to walk away from a friend, but it really does sound like you tried as much and as often as you could to help. At some point you have to weight the pros and cons and see what this is doing to your spirit and your day-to-day. You can't possibly help if you, yourself, are now worn down because of her actions and lifestyle. I wish you the best.
    Nickl likes this.
  15. Nickl

    Nickl Member

    I have tried everything I thought could help. From buying a house so she can be away from everyone that uses. To spending my days calling rehab centers. To bailing her out of jail to bring her to live out of state to live with her father. I thought that was helping because she agreed it would help. I've never dealt with an addict. I thought I was doing the right thing. But yes now I'm emotionally and physically exhausted from this.



    Min likes this.
  16. Min

    Min Active Contributor

    Wow, @Nickl - buying someone a house? That is truly above and beyond. You absolutely have done so much for this person, so much time and money and love and effort. So much work on making them better. It definitely is time to take care of yourself now.
    Nickl likes this.
  17. MrsJones

    MrsJones Community Listener Community Listener

    Yes, I agree with @Min. @Nickl, I might be misunderstanding about buying the house though. So maybe there is a commitment here in the relationship that I'm missing which is why you are so confused about what to do.
    Nickl likes this.
  18. Nickl

    Nickl Member

    I mean her and I had talked about how we felt towards each other. But I'm sure everything she said to me was a lie. Seeing as though she won't say a word from me she just runs from any way we can communicate. But yes I was going to get a bigger house for her and her kids. No matter what kind of relationship there would ever have been between the two of us I wanted my friend to be happy and healthy
  19. MrsJones

    MrsJones Community Listener Community Listener

    Okay @Nickl. It sounds like you still have hope that your friend will eventually come back to you. I can understand that. So are you keeping in touch with the children?
  20. LovesBigFool

    LovesBigFool Active Contributor

    It seems that you have not yet realized the depths that addiction will take her. You need to wake up to the reality of who you are dealing with.

    Sorry to be so blunt, but you are ignoring what everyone is trying to tell you. Ask yourself how all these posters are so sure they know what this girl is like (someone they have never met).

    Listen, imagine you are a character in a horror movie and she is the monster that has not been revealed to you yet.

    You need to know that she is capable of making you hurt in ways you cannot imagine--- if you grant her that power over your heart.
    MrsJones and Nickl like this.