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Is this paws? Normal?

Discussion in 'Opiate Withdrawal Treatment' started by ZenGuy, Dec 18, 2018.

  1. ZenGuy

    ZenGuy Member

    Hi, I'm a 39 y.o male addicted to pain pills (percs, oxys).
    Was on them for like 20 months following a minor motorcycle accident.
    Recently quit, used a 2 week tramadol self-wean to get through the physical stuff but the weeks thereafter have been the most miserable of my life: crippling depression, anxiety, and an ability to experience pleasure.
    Out of desperation, and after much reading, I tried kratom for relief ...and it worked! But I've decided to leave that alone too as I don't wanna have to rely on it just to feel okay.
    So anyways, is this normal? All efforts at self-treating these symptoms have failed and I'm scared because I've read that it can take years for the brain chemistry to get back on track and I don't think that I can cope that long. Recently I caved and have been back on pills for like 5 days but am going full abstinent again tomorrow (unless tramadol is required for physical withdrawal again -not sure if I've done enough percs to bring that back on).
    Any discussion would be appreciated as I'm somewhat isolated now after having ditched my friends ( they are all on drugs, etc.), and I'm also single...and what family I do have are terribly dysfunctional.

    Last edited: Dec 18, 2018
  2. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @ZenGuy hello there. welcome. glad you're on the recover path.... i don't have the expertise to comment about this... maybe someone else will. talking to a medical professional may be your best bet though...

    i'll be thinking of you as you go through this.... and please, come here anytime! we're here for you!
  3. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    Welcome to the community, @ZenGuy. I'm sorry to hear about your issues, but I'm happy you want to get off the pills for good. That's a wise decision.

    It sounds to me like the symptoms you're having are likely from withdrawal, but I'm not a doctor (or even close to it), so I can't give you a definitive answer. Like @Dominica, I think talking to a medical professional would be a great thing for you to do. Are you in the U.S.? If you are, you can find an addiction specialist by using the Find a Doctor link on the American Board of Addiction Medicine's website. Here's the link:

    An addiction specialist can assess your situation and help you devise a plan to wean off of the meds with minimal withdrawal symptoms. I really think that's your best bet.

    We are here to help, support, and listen. You are not alone. So please come back and post as much as you'd like.

    Sending you positive, healing energy.
  4. ZenGuy

    ZenGuy Member

    Thanks, I genuinely appreciate the replies but then I guess I'm just screwed.
    While I too am pretty sure that talking to a medical professional would be the way to go, that's not gonna happen for me because I'm un-insured and trying to recover financially from months of spending like 90% of my income on pills.
    And really though, Ideally, I don't wanna get on meds anyways as pretty much everything available (suboxone treatment, anti depressants, benzos etc) come with their own side effects and withdrawal issues. And I've abused my body so much with drugs over the years that I'd like to stop torturing my liver.
    My goal is to learn how to be happy and functional again without a chemical crutch. I dont know, just nothing's working.
    Thanks again
    Dominica likes this.
  5. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    The idea behind seeing an addiction specialist is to get off the pills altogether, but to do it in a way that's safe and minimizes withdrawals. I totally get the money part--not having insurance sucks--but maybe think of it as an investment in your future. It sounds like you spent a ton of $$ f*cking your life up; maybe spending a little more to make it better wouldn't be such a bad idea. Just my two cents.

    Whichever route you choose, I hope you can overcome the pills and withdrawals sooner rather than later. It's good that you want to quit. And we're definitely rooting for you.
    Dominica likes this.
  6. ZenGuy

    ZenGuy Member

    Yeah I totally get it, I just...I don't know. Suppose I'm just going to have to suffer through it and hope for the best as I don't want any more mood altering prescription meds, I just want my brain chemistry to kick in and do what it's supposed to do naturally. But it's just not.
    Probably deep down I was hoping someone would be like "hey, I've discovered this super amazing supplement/home remedy that will heal your brain" lol.
    I do know that If I beat this thing I'm definitely gonna somehow get involved with helping others suffering through this, this is just the most terrible $h** I've ever gone through and it sucks to know that like every other person I know is on this stuff. Okay I'm rambling so I'll close for now.
  7. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @ZenGuy i don't think there's an easy solution to addiction recovery... as much as we wish there was!

    i do find embarking on a wholeheartedly spiritual journey can be helpful. working with the mind, body, and SPIRIT.

    just my two cents.. :)

    a therapist can help so much. save some money and just go. some offer flat fee cash rates that are so affordable. like $40-$80 per session. you are worth it!
    deanokat likes this.
  8. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    If I had a magic wand, I'd send it your way, @ZenGuy. Believe me, I've wished for such a thing for years so I could fix my son's addiction and mental health issues with a wave of it. Unfortunately, magic wands don't exist in real life. So we have to be strong and beat our demons on our own.

    Stay strong. Be brave. And keep the faith.