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Long Way To Temporary Recovery

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by JonMark, Feb 4, 2015.

  1. JonMark

    JonMark Active Contributor

    This weekend I had a show and I indulged in a bit too much alcohol at the venue. I know that at the beginning when I started, I was having a decent time with food and drink and then as the day progressed and I interacted with people, my memory is a bit fuzzy.

    At one point, I sat down and spoke with the owner of the place who kind of confronted me on the fact that he was spending a bit too much money on me from a show I had the previous night. I believe I assured him that everything was fine and I was working on bringing in more acts. I also told him about my hardcore marketing campaign through podcasting and other means of promotion to get more people in.

    I also told him about the comedy format, which he hadn't seen but went right into the possible offensive material. I think I suggested he check the comedy when it came back in a few weeks but also told him a story as to why that previous night have been a dud.

    I remember closing out my tab that night and thinking to myself, I was going to be walking to the first bus stop that would take me back home, which wouldn't be for another four to five hours.

    I did a lot of walking that night/morning but when I finally got home, I know I smelled like booze and sweaty air. When I woke up the next afternoon, I was somewhat relieved to be home but had this lagging depression over me.

    I suggested that we go get something to eat, my mom and I and felt that pizza might do me some good but, that depression was still hitting me hard. What was life all about? Was this all their was?

    At the last minute, we decided to go to a Mexican restaurant which had non-alcoholic beer because, I felt I needed to take that edge off. That and food and an atmosphere that reminded me of my family's history, didn't completely get me back but, it helped me think that things were going to be okay and to stick to my routine, work hard to keep things consistent. No tripping up!
  2. elles-belles

    elles-belles Community Champion

    Aww sounds like you just had a small fall out in terms of being sober and over indulged a bit. I don't think you should actually beat yourself up, these things happen and the important thing is that you realized where you went wrong are willing to stay focused on the route that you have chosen! Well done on that and thanks for sharing this, shows that staying sober gets hard and that we will trip up once in a while!
    JonMark likes this.
  3. KNH

    KNH Active Contributor

    Like the last person said, don't beat yourself up about it! Sure, you had too much to drink one night, but you acknowledged it and plan on keeping up your sober routine, which is the most important part. Keep up the good work!
    JonMark likes this.
  4. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    " If we are facing in the right direction all we have to do is keeping on walking" Zen Proverb......There will be humps and their will be bumps in this journey of life but just keep on walking and don't look back.
  5. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Absolutely. It's going to be one long journey to recovery, and everyday is a fight, it's a battle. You've just got to keep things on perspective and I'll tell you, it's going to be worth it.
  6. jon

    jon Active Contributor

    Yeah, you should be careful so that you don't ruin the gigs that you are playing. Drinking can definitely cause those kinds of problems.
  7. JonMark

    JonMark Active Contributor

    Yes. Every time I have these experiences, I keep hoping the outcome is different. But the other thing also is that I'm now walking around with a microphone to document stuff like this so I can put it on my podcast and relive the experience. Kind of, put a theme to my podcast program.

    The beating myself up thing is hard because I can't seem to shake it when I'm doing it. I'm constantly beating myself up over all sorts of stuff. This is probably weird to say but it's all part of a process I'm currently engaging called being thorough so I can take the fight to people and be fully prepared and ready for debate. But yes, It helps me regain focus for sure!
  8. TommyVercetti

    TommyVercetti Community Champion

    Documenting your experiences for whatever reason is very progressive when it comes to recovery. It seems like you are on your way to life free from addictions. It will be hard getting there, but seeing as you have your family as a support group, you'll do fine in the long run. Just stick with it and control you urges by not only thinking of the consequences, but also of the life you will have when you are finally free.