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Losing respect

Discussion in 'Alcohol' started by Hannah, Apr 11, 2016.

  1. Hannah

    Hannah Member

    I guess you know you have a problem with alcohol when your friends start losing respect for you. Who can blame them? We went out and I got very drunk and then was being dramatic and useless, lost my phone and bag... no wonder why people doing want to hang out with you while you are drinking.
    Urgh....
  2. sillylucy

    sillylucy Community Champion

    I think that is the first sign when you know you have a drinking problem. When people start to lose all respect for you and you start to shun them for doing so. It is time to look at what you are doing in life and time to change.
  3. FenWoFon

    FenWoFon Active Contributor

    IT does not mean that you're becoming an alcoholic person, yo uactually know what you did and I guess that you might have your reasons, do not get scared about if you're on your way to become alcoholic, that is completly false, live your life and have fun, your friends should know that it could have happened to any of them as well, they're such bad friends though, leave them and live your life the way you want.
  4. JonnyMacdonald

    JonnyMacdonald Community Champion

    Losing respect from peers is a huge sign that your drinking isn't healthy.
    Losing self-respect can also be a sign.
  5. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I always think to myself that the true friends of mine were the ones who encouraged me to get help. Anyone who is making you feel terrible as a result of your drinking probably isn't what I would call a true friend. All that serves to do is make you feel worse about yourself and I know that in situations like that for me, it would have made me drink more.

    Try and surround yourself with people that want the best for you. And if you've identified you have a problematic relationship with drinking, it's never too early to seek help :) all the best!
  6. darkrebelchild

    darkrebelchild Community Champion

    There is nothing as humiliating as loosing respect from people; it would take a while for you @Hannah to gain that respect back.

    All that matters now is cutting down on the alcohol intake. It means it affects you so badly you are unmindful of what goes on. One step at a time and you will realize you are much of a better person than being under the influence of alcohol.
  7. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    People will obviously not want to be seen with someone who will embarrass them. So apparently you've got to the fork on the road. You have to choose between your friends and alcohol.

    Choose alcohol and you lose your friends. Choose you friends and you have to stop drinking. I recommend the latter.
    Mara likes this.
  8. mistermiranda

    mistermiranda Member

    It's a major step in admitting that you recognized a problem. Was this the first time that it's happened?

    One thing that has me curious is that it sounds like your friends have cut you off. Do any of them have contact with you via phone/text (assuming you replaced your phone) or social media?

    But getting back to admitting that you see a problem, kudos. Now to ask yourself, what is the ideal life that you see for yourself? How will you get there?
    Mara likes this.
  9. Mara

    Mara Community Champion

    People tend to do stupid things when drunk. It's a good thing that you only lost your phone and your bag. Nothing untoward happened to you, that's what's important. Some people are not as fortunate.

    Regarding your friends, perhaps it's not too late to patch things up with them. You can hang out and have fun but just veer away from alcohol so as not to have a repeat of what has transpired before.

    Take care @Hannah.
  10. henry

    henry Community Champion

    Yep, it's happened to me as well. Everyone thinks your a real cool guy until they see what a mess of a person you are when you're drunk. It usually wears off and they start to respect you again, but that's only until they see you drunk again. Then the cycle starts again.
  11. peetbernadis

    peetbernadis Active Contributor

    Oh yes, you definitely do funny and unusual things being under the influence. But you don't find it strange or unusual at all. I can just marvel at the way people change as soon as the alcohol takes over. I think its true what the Bible says about wine....making you strong as a lion. funny as an ape and all those things.
  12. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    I think that at one time or another we've all been guilty of being drunk and making fools of ourselves. Every now and again there isn't anything wrong with that, it's when it becomes a regular occurrence then you have to take a step back and look at your behaviour.
  13. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    If they were you real friends they would be there for you and help you rather then turn their back on you. It is no fun to go out and get to the point where you have no control of yourself. If it happens once in a while it is one thing but if this is a constant thing then I think maybe you should cut back on your alcohol consumption. If you don't feel you can do it yourself then seek help. There is nothing wrong with asking for help.
  14. Tsky45

    Tsky45 Community Champion

    Drinking too much can cause you to make mistakes. It's not really a good idea to get drunk while your out and about. These days anything could happen. There was a situation a while back when a drunk woman called a cab to take her home and got raped by the cab driver. It's really safer to stay home if you want to drink. We all learn from our mistakes.
  15. peetbernadis

    peetbernadis Active Contributor

    I tend to agree. Over-indulgence will definitely cause problems one way or the other. One just have to be careful and not go over the top.
  16. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    Not going over the the top. Not over indulging. Whatever you want to call it, it's all about moderation and like I've said regarding taking various drugs, it's that what's the most important aspect, and what you need to look out for.
  17. integrity101

    integrity101 Active Contributor

    When people start snubbing you when they go partying due to your uncontrollable behavior, then it's time to quit drinking. You may not even be overindulging or taking more than you did before but your body's capacity to handle even a little liquor may be on the decline. Personally, I used to be that guy who took as much liquor as everyone else and still remain sober enough to take all my drunk friends home in the early hours of the morning but somewhere along the line I lost my "liquor-carrying" capacity and was eventually the guy who blacked out first. So I think if you've started losing your phone and becoming a nuisance to your buddies, then it is indeed high time to hang your liquor boots before you mess up your life.
  18. tackykardia

    tackykardia Member

    Yeah it's time to try to stop drinking. I've been there and have felt pretty stupid afterwards. It's no fun having blackouts either where you can't remember a lot of things and other people are telling you what you did and said. It sucks having to wonder why you and a friend or friends are mad each other and can't even remember. I don't miss those days at all. So if you can't drink moderately then it might be time to get help and quit altogether.
  19. djolem

    djolem Senior Contributor

    My uncle was a cool guy once and he is an alcoholic for some 30 years now. He is considered to be a bum now. He lives like a homeless person although he has a home and a house. He lives alone, he has dozens of cats and he stinks. No self-respect produces no respect fro the others. It is simple as that.
  20. Tremmie

    Tremmie Community Champion

    Sadly this does happen, a lot people start to think less of you when you end up getting drunk so often and acting up. The shame the morning after is awful. Another great reason to stop drinking, I'm so glad I've been sober since 2012. Not sure if I'd have been able to do it if I still had my gallbladder.