This is a question for those of you who suffer from bipolar disorder. I myself have bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder and am also a recovering alcoholic. Do you find it harder to stay sober when you're manic or when you're depressed? Thank God, I've been sober now for about 12 years, but when I'm in a depression is the hardest time for me to continue staying sober. I feel the urge to drink to help me escape from the sadness, self-hate, and emptiness. However, since I realize and acknowledge that this time (the depression) is the most difficult time for me in terms of sobriety, I can take appropriate precautions. When I feel myself falling into a depression, I know that I must be especially careful to stay away from people and places that could be triggers. Thankfully, I've recently gotten on medications that finally seem to be helping with the bipolar disorder, and so the depressions aren't nearly as frequent or as deep. I'm curious to know when other bipolar individuals find it hardest to stay sober and/or drug-free ... while you're depressed or while you're manic, or perhaps when you're neither? Knowing when you're most at risk can help you come up with an appropriate "game plan" to stay clean.