I had a friend in high school who told me he was diagnosed by a doctor with Attention Deficit Disorder. When he described all the symptoms I was amazed because everything he said was exactly how I would describe the way my mind seems to differ from others normally. When I was 23 I was introduced to crystal meth at a party and hooked almost immediately for a year. I was able to quit and remove myself from the source and remained clean for 6-7 years without incident until I moved to a new city and on top of being lonely, working double shifts, I quickly fell into a hook up for buying speed. I used for many years and the odd thing is nobody ever suspected a thing. I didn't display stereotypical tweaker traits and was able to stay employed and socialize while none were any the wiser of my dependency. However I eventually had a boyfriend who used my drug use as an excuse to break up with me so I checked myself in to a rehab. The past 5 years have been rocky as I'm in my 40's now and single so I have made an effort to stay clean but relapse is practically inevitable. I don't look at it as failure and beat myself up, I just get back up and try to stay clean as much as possible. What I've noticed is that I actually function better while using and when clean I only feel inadequate to contribute to society. I can not keep up with email, facebook, and the like and always miss out on opportunities which is upsetting. I plan to find a psychiatrist to see if taking an L-ampetamine or Ritalin may prevent me relapsing as I no longer seek the high but just to have a productive life and lose the stigma of being meth user which is devastatingly damaging. I'll keep ya updated and love to hear similar stories or studies since it seems like an obvious harm reduction method if distributed in a way to prevent abuse. I'm on maintenance! How about you?