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My daughter got beat up last night

Discussion in 'Alcohol' started by L_B, Nov 15, 2015.

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  1. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    My daughter beat up really bad my a new boyfriend and some girl. She got knocked out and thrown down the stairs. She is in bad shape. She is pressing charges against these people but I worry now about what will happen. She has only been seeing him for six weeks and he always came across as a really nice guy but he showed his true colors last night. She could have been killed. He was drunk and high at the time. I am sick to my stomach right now. Her daughter is with me because it is not a good idea for her to see her this.time :(
    cotyb25 likes this.
  2. Nergaahl

    Nergaahl Community Champion

    Help her get away from him as soon as possible. She doesn't need such a monster in her life. Tell her to leave him and never look back. If he hit her once, it will happen again and again. The fact that he cheated on her makes it even worse. Support her and help her overcome this nightmare.
    Bunnyriffic likes this.
  3. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    She is away from him but he is very angry that she is pressing charges. I worry about what he will her now or what he will.have someone else do to her. She works alone in a bar and comes 4am. He knows her hours and where she lives.
  4. doatk22

    doatk22 Community Champion

    Have you or her talked to police about what you can do for protection? Please make her carry a pocket knife with her if she doesn't have a gun. Especially since she works those hours. I'm glad she's pressing charges and I'm really sorry this happened to her. That's very devastating. I hope she will be okay and move forward away from him for good.
  5. xTinx

    xTinx Community Champion

    Report the incident to the nearest police station while it's still fresh. Go to the women's help desk (if there's one) and tell the resident policemen and women the exact details. Don't leave anything out. Your daughter needs to be treated immediately too for any concussions she might have incurred. A guy who beats up women doesn't deserve to live or be with one. The guy needs to go to rehab too. The violence he inflicted shouldn't be tolerated and justice must be served.
  6. Starlight

    Starlight Member

    I feel for you very much. It's awful to be in that kind of situation. To know the person you love has been hurt, but are powerless to do anything about it. I'm really, truly sorry... :(

    I think you should try to be there for your daughter as much as possible. If your daughter has already pressed charges, be there for her. Try to support and help her through it. The fact that he knows her hours and where she lives is troubling. Is it possible to get her to stop work for awhile? Until the police catch this guy?
  7. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    There've been together only six weeks and he's beating her up already? This is one jerk she should stay away from. It's good to hear that she's pressing charges against her two assailants. Should he try to contact her trying to apologize or anything, she should also get a restraining order. There are some people who are best out of the lives of others for good.
    MrsJones likes this.
  8. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    I am sorry to hear about the current situation of your daughter. That must be very hard on your end. Well, I do hope those people who have hurt your daughter would now rot in jail.

    I would be praying for your whole family.
  9. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    Well it's obvious that your daughter should press charges no matter how worried you all are about what consequences might happen. People like that deserve the punishment he will hopefully get coming to him.

    As for being worried about work, I'd mention that to the police and they could apply a restraining order banning him from coming anywhere near her or that place, at least until the case is settled anyway.
  10. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    Thank you everybody for your replies. The cops have been called, the charges have been laid. The restraining orders are in place. I seen her today and she is beaten so badly she is unrecognizable to me. She is such a beautiful girl and her face is a mess. There is a huge cut under her eye. I hope that is doesn't scar. She is lucky to be alive though. They could have killed her.

    She is a makeup artist so she will be able to cover a lot of the bruising with makeup but the swelling it unreal. I tried to hold it together for her but all the way home I cried. I felt helpless. I will be there for her the whole step of the way. The best that I can be. I know that she keeps things from me because she doesn't want me to worry about her.

    This breaks my heart. I will never understand cowardly mean who beat on women!
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.
  11. kgord

    kgord Community Champion

    Your daughter needs some serious help. I mean letting someone beat on her to the extent she is in the hospital? I suppose she is one that does not want to seek help for her substance abuse issues. I hope she gets a restraining order against this man and never sees him again. That is horrible. The fact she is a mother makes it so much worse.
  12. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    My daughter does not have any substance abuse issues. I am not sure where you got that. He did and she had no idea he was abusive until the other night. Before that he was the perfect gentleman always. She didn't let him beat on her. One punch to the head and she was knocked out, then he continued to beat on her and threw her down the stairs. She woke up at the bottom of the stairs. There were witnesses to the assault. She was the victim here. She is a mom and a good one too. She just started dating the wrong person and she now has a restraining order against him and charges laid.
    Last edited: Nov 16, 2015
    MrsJones and deanokat like this.
  13. Damien Lee

    Damien Lee Community Champion

    Any guy that beats up a woman is not a real man in my opinion. In fact, it's monsters like these that give us men a bad name. We're meant to be the ones protecting women, children and the weaker members of our society.

    I'm glad that your daughter survived the ordeal. She did the right thing to press charges, these people should be in jail. I think that it's important any close family members and friends be in close proximity to your daughter over the next couple of weeks or months. It's better that she is safe and secure while the authorities deal with these people.
    L_B likes this.
  14. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @L_B... I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to your daughter. Please know that I am keeping her and her daughter in my thoughts and prayers. And you, too. It's so unfortunate that people can have a dark side that we don't know about until it's too late. It sounds like everything that's being done is exactly what should be done: pressing charges, restraining orders, etc. I think the best thing you can do right now is to trust the system.

    Be strong, my friend. I am sending positive, healing vibes to your daughter. And positive vibes and big hugs to you. We are here if you need us for anything.
    MrsJones likes this.
  15. I hope she has reported him to the police and is able to get away with no further incidents. She is lucky to have your support.
  16. Tsky45

    Tsky45 Community Champion

    Sounds like she needs to stay away from this guy. This sounds like an extreme case of domestic abuse. I hope your daughter will be okay. Being drunk and high at the time really won't help his guys case if he ends up in court. Like I said the best thing to do is stay away from him.
  17. FuZyOn

    FuZyOn Community Champion

    I'd definitely get a restraining order as soon as possible. Since she presses charges he might come after her so it's only for the best to be cautious! Talk to a lawyer ASAP and get things ready since that guy can go to jail for a long time if the evidence is good.
  18. lexinonomous

    lexinonomous Community Champion

    Please help her get away from this situation as soon as possible. If this man is willing to put hands on your daughter at only six weeks into the relationship, imagine what damage he could do in a year. Abusive relationships get worse over time and can sometimes end fatal. I would have to hear about your daughter going through a situation and not coming out on the other side. Abuse is serious and should be taken seriously. I pray she presses charges and gets a restraining order. No one is worth her life.
  19. juno

    juno Community Champion

    I'm sorry to hear what has happened. It is so important for your daughter to see that any guy who could hurt her in that way does not deserve any other chances. She also needs to consider that fact that she has her own daughter that she needs to be there for and be a good example for.
  20. Dwayneu

    Dwayneu Community Champion

    Help her distance herself as much as possible(good on the restraining orders). But not just from this guy, but from any toxic destructive relationships with such people. Without judging you, you should be more involved with her and encourage her to have self-respect and seek out her company better. If she is worried for her safety, even after charges and restraining orders, do not be hesitant to involve the cops at all, they will help trust me.
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