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My fiance wont quit smoking k2

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by Bella1990, Mar 21, 2018.

  1. Bella1990

    Bella1990 Member

    My name is Bella and my husband will not stop smoking synthetic weed he calls K2. This stuff scares the hell out of me. When he smokes it he reminds me of someone with special needs( please no offense) his arms go up to his chest, he can barely talk and when he does you can't understand him, he hallucinates says he sees orbs etc..., sometimes he freaks out like the one time he didn't remember I was home and thought I was someone breaking into my house and totally freaked out I honestly thought he was going to hurt me and this was not the first time he's acted like this. I consistently ask him to stop smoking it or he's going to lose me and he always says he will and never does...he does it so much I don't even like being around him anymore because if he's not high on it he's asking me for money for it... I don't know what to do I love him to death but cannot continue to live like this... anyone have any ideas I would really appreciate it....thanks for listening
  2. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @Bella1990 hi there. thanks for reaching out. i'm sorry you're having to go through this. addiction can certainly put a strain on a marriage.

    you shouldn't have to continue like this. being on the opposite end of an addict is challenging... you want to be able to help him, but you're limited. he's got to want to change...

    here starts your journey... a journey trying to navigate life with an addict, or life leaving an addict if things stay the same...

    here's a great article to read that goes over a lot of things that will be helpful to you.... i'll also leave a link to a great short guide that can help you... start educating yourself on addiction and things like "al anon" or "nar anon". family members of addicts can learn how to best take care of themselves....during the rough time. it's easy to get wrapped up in the addicts world and go emotionally crazy... so effort will be necessary to learn how to practice self-care...

    here's the article: https://www.recovery.org/topics/how-to-help-a-loved-one-with-addiction/

    here's the short guide: https://the20minuteguide.com/partners/introduction-partners-guide/

    i will say this will be an opportunity for you learn how to set (and keep) firm boundaries. husband or not, you're not responsible to give him money... and if you do, you're enabling him to continue using. he must face consequences of his using, or he'll have no reason to want to stop. no money...his fault. not yours. and if he knows you want him to quit, again, setting and keeping a boundaries are necessary. support groups like al-anon or nar-anon are great at helping you learn some great ways to set boundaries and get through this... consider attending meetings.

    does this help?
  3. Bella1990

    Bella1990 Member

    Yes it does thank you so much
  4. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @Bella1990 i'm here for you! reach out anytime... i'm wanting the best for YOU <3
  5. Hi_Im_Shawn

    Hi_Im_Shawn Member

    Bella, I have been using and abusing drugs for a LONG time. But like you, I can say I agree this stuff scares the hell out of me. I don't have any experience with this particular drug, but I honestly do not know why people even use it. Like...where is the pleasure in this? What you described is mild compared to some of the stories I've heard.

    Maybe you should remind your fiancé that he once asked you to marry him, run through the list of shenanigans he's pulled while using this garbage drug, and then ask him if he really thinks you want to commit to spend the rest of your life with someone like that?

    Nearly half of marriages in this country end in divorce, and that is usually without the problem of one of the spouses being hooked on "synthetic marijuana" (quotes because this isn't marijuana at all, it's herby looking stuff sprayed with poison. Might as well be huffing gasoline, seriously).
  6. Hi_Im_Shawn

    Hi_Im_Shawn Member

    Correction, for some reason I thought you said this was your fiancé. I know marriage is a lifelong commitment but it sounds like your husband may have checked out mentally. You should try to figure out if he's past the point of no return, or if there is in fact hope he'll snap out of this utterly pathetic condition he's gotten himself in.

    Whatever happens, don't let his poor decision bring you down with him.
  7. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @Hi_Im_Shawn some great insight Shawn. it is important to think about your own well-being. it matters whether the addict is actively seeking to move toward change.... if not, then some major decisions or boundaries are in order.
  8. lovecraftXIX

    lovecraftXIX Active Contributor

    Are you sure you still want to marry him? I can't call it a way to relax. My ex also had fun in this way, but I immediately understood where it would lead. There is no point in wasting time on someone who does not see anything wrong with destroying himself. If you want to stay with him, make him go to rehab. After that, he will want to smoke, so offer him a dot pro vape. I quit smoking cigarettes with the help of a vape. It should help him cope with the habit. But if he refuses your help, please leave him.