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My Friend is Addicted to Smoking

Discussion in 'Helping an Addicted Loved One' started by SashaS, Feb 17, 2016.

  1. SashaS

    SashaS Community Champion

    My friend, let's call him John, has been a smoking addict since the age of 19, he is 32 now. I am with him almost every day as we work together and I have seen the effects that a pack a day has taken on him. He smells, no matter how much he tries not to and the obvious effects that come with smoking are evident. What I hate is that he is such a great guy and the best friend I could ever wish for. He does acknowledge his addiction but says he finds it difficult to stop.

    I don't want to confront him about it as he is an emotional fellow and I don't want to come off as if what he is doing is making me angry because if anything, it's just breaking my heart. What I would like to know is how could I confront him about this? What exactly do I say or even better, suggest he does?

    I don't want to make him feel bad or guilty. Thanks in advance. Regards.
  2. Davienna

    Davienna Community Champion

    This can be a tough one as some persons may not take correction easily, some persons can be rather sensitive. I have been in similar situations where my female co-workers smelled like smoke but I just did not say anything to them. I think you could buy him a Nicorette and tell him to try it instead.
    SashaS likes this.
  3. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    You have to choose your words carefully because he may not take well to the criticism. Depending on how care you are and how the communication is between the two of you. If you feel he won't get upset then tell him how you feel and the you can talk about it together but prepare yourself for things not going good. It is a difficult topic to approach somebody about.
    SashaS likes this.
  4. explorerx7

    explorerx7 Senior Contributor

    the fact that he has acknowledged his addiction and wants to stop is a good thing, and this could make it a bit easier to work with him in trying to cure his addiction. You are trying to be sensitive, however, you may have to take the risk of getting across the message to him come what may, because if you do nothing about it, you still would not be helping to improve his well-being.
    SashaS likes this.
  5. darkrebelchild

    darkrebelchild Community Champion

    If John is your @SashaS best friend, the best way not to lose him is by telling him your fears. If someone else tells him, you will be regarded s the enemy. He knows the problem; provide suggestions for him in a caring, understanding manner. This way, John will act in a friendly manner by either peacefully rejecting your help or yielding to you.
    SashaS likes this.
  6. Mara

    Mara Community Champion

    Tread lightly. You said that he is a sensitive fellow, so better choose your words carefully when telling him that he needs to stop smoking. One good thing about this is that he knows that he has a problem. He's not in denial. That's a good sign. It means that he will be receptive to what you'll say to him. You're his best friend and he will realize that you are just concerned for his well-being. If there is anyone who can convince him to stop, it's probably you.

    Anyway, good luck and do your best. :)
    SashaS likes this.
  7. Momma9

    Momma9 Community Champion

    I wonder if you could ask if there is anything you could do to help support him if he would like to quit? Then maybe he would feel like you want to help and not just tell him what he is doing wrong. Maybe give him a book or article that offers tips on how to stop smoking? Best wishes to you and him! Let us know what you end up doing!