An American Addiction Centers Resource

New to the Forums?Join or

My Story: Disability, Chronic Pain, Opioids

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by laura_p17, Nov 8, 2018.

  1. laura_p17

    laura_p17 Member

    Hi everyone!

    I’ll try to make this short. I am severely disabled, living in chronic pain. This summer, after sustaining a bone injury, I took too many painkillers and too much medicinal weed and OD’d. My partner found me in time and I was resuscitated in the ambulance. But I basically died and after I saw the eyes of my grief-stricken mom who thought she lost her only daughter, this absolutely cannot happen again.

    While I am still on opioids (I’ve tried pretty much everything else for my pain and nothing worked), I’ve been trying very, very hard to never exceed the prescribed daily dosage. But it’s an uphill battle.

    I am looking forward to getting to know many of you! I am unable to discuss my addiction with my family or my partner, for many reasons, so talking about here, with you, should be very helpful.

    lonewolves likes this.
  2. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @laura_p17 hello and welcome. glad you are still here! i'm sure that was a scary experience for everyone.

    i'm sorry about your chronic pain. i'm sure that can be quite challenging.

    we will be here for you...for sure. you're taking your meds as prescribed...which is good. wondering if you have access to a counselor? might help to chat about these things with a professional.....

    does the medicinal marijuana help you with your pain? just curious.

    look forward to getting to know you better!
    True concern likes this.
  3. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    @laura_p17 welcome to the site:).I am sorry to hear about your situation but please know YOU are not alone;).This forum is great,the people who work it are so supportive and of course there are those of use who don't work it who care as well.When I first came here about 10 month's ago I felt helpless, I thought there was no hope as I was struggling with several addictions at the same time and I had just really started to see the pain I was causing my loved one's, so I sympathize with you on that,but please know we all want YOU to succeed and we all want you to be able to share openly as that's how the healing process begins to work.I am looking forward to getting to know you and I hope and pray you can find something here that will help you on your journey. SMILE:) you are cared about by all of us and we are so proud of you :).Stay Strong and God Bless you
    Dominica likes this.
  4. laura_p17

    laura_p17 Member

    Honestly, I'm not sure. It makes things hazy and... easier to bear sometimes. But since it was a significant factor in my OD, I hardly use it anymore. And even when I do, I make sure I don't mix it with the opioids on a given day. I've been pretty diligent about this in the last few months.

    The hardest thing right now is resisting the urge to take "one extra pill" when things get rough, which they do. My mom has her own health problems and my stepdad is abusing alcohol, though he isn't violent or anything. And I don't have any other family. I can't afford counseling, which really sucks too.

    Thank you both for the kind words!
    True concern and Dominica like this.
  5. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @laura_p17... Welcome to the community and thanks for sharing. We are here for you anytime you need us. For help, support, advice, or just to listen. We will never judge you, either. Like @True concern said, you are not alone!

    Looking forward to seeing you around the forum! :)
    Dominica and True concern like this.
  6. lonewolves

    lonewolves Community Champion

    Welcome to the forum! You seem very aware of yourself and the journey you will have to take to get clean. I believe in my heart, just from these short posts, that you can do this! Sorry if this sounds cheesy haha!
    True concern, Dominica and deanokat like this.
  7. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @laura_p17 yes, just know that we are here.... use as your sounding board, accountability, etc. we'll encourage you and root for you!!!
    deanokat, lonewolves and True concern like this.
  8. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    @laura_p17 just checking in, hope everything is going well and I hope you have a beautiful day
    deanokat and Dominica like this.