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Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by monsterific, Dec 30, 2014.

  1. monsterific

    monsterific Member

    Hello Everyone,

    I have an older half-sister, she grew up in the care of our grandmother but she had a good childhood nonetheless. She moved in with us when she was around 14, and she was really smart. We were close, better than my younger sister... she was a bright, lively girl who loves to joke around. That's how I remembered her, it all changed when she befriended the wrong sorts of people.

    It's been 15years that she's been struggling with drug addiction. She went away to become independent after college and we've never heard from her since then, she would only come in contact with us when she needed money. My mom and younger sister tried to help her, we did all we could, rehab, counseling, and family support but she can only stay clean for a couple of months then we would runaway and do drugs again.

    Eventually.. my mom, dad and my younger sister gave-up on her last year. However I'm still holding on to my hopes of her recovering. She has 2 kids, both very smart too... the girl have no idea about her mother's addiction, that it was the reason why my sister abandoned her when she was 3 year old and the younger boy, who had seen his mother's insanity and loathes her. I can't blame him, at a young age he went through the pits of h3ll with my sister. :( We had to save him from her 2 years ago..

    Every night I pray for my sister's well-being.. I'm still hoping that she'd be able to fight and stay strong for the kids but her kids and anyone in the family is not good enough reason for her to stay away from her addiction, she's gone a bit crazy too. :(

    I'm not sure how to help her anymore... She needs a strong reason in order for her to be able to keep on fighting but it seems like there is no one. I don't know how I can help her, if there is still anything I can do to help her. She's been clean for 3mos now... but I'm afraid that she'd runaway and go back to her addiction. It has become a cycle in the past years.. :(

    I don't know what else I can do... it is so frustrating.
  2. bluedressed

    bluedressed Community Champion

    Kidnap her and make her go cold turkey?

    Just joking (I know, I know, sensitive subjects and joke...). It's clear to see how much you love her and care for her. It is good that there is at least still one person who does not give up; if everyone did, then when she would be deciding for her own to quit, then she might not have the strength to, seeing no open door back. You are this door that stays open for her to come through, and it is important that you keep your faith and keep reaching out. You're doing good.

    As for her, sometimes it's not about reasons being good or bad, it's just about what she can see for herself and what she is not able to. I don't know. But I know you should still be there for her, and maybe even sometimes for other occasions than to "fix her"; the more she feels ashamed in front of you and your family, the more she will pull away and the harder it could be to help her.

    I wish you hope and love, good luck.
    monsterific likes this.
  3. monsterific

    monsterific Member

    Thank you for these encouraging words. There are just times I feel so frustrated, but most of the time I am positive. I told her before that no matter what, she will have us behind her. 10years or 15years from now, her family will still be there to help her and will be the ones to stay with her until the end.

    But she's getting worse than better. She tried to poison an uncle who was helping her last year, 2013. She also pointed a knife on her 5year old son's forehead. We were so surprised to see blood on his forehead, he sealed his lips for 2days then told my mother about it. Which was the main reason my nephew was traumatized and despised his own mother.

    I'm trying to save as much as I could of what remains of her family. It's a new year, and I hope that she will be able to stay strong until she's able to fully control her self from her addiction. Others can manage to stay clean for years... I hope that will happen to her too.

    Have a great 2015 to you and your family, bluedressed.
  4. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    Welcome to the forum and happy New year too. :)
    It is a good thing that you really care and still have hopes for your sister. Sad that she had done and can do such things especially hurting her own son. Hope that this year, she will eventually get better.