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Not Giving Up On Life

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by crc3thebest, Mar 17, 2015.

  1. crc3thebest

    crc3thebest Community Champion

    I find myself in a depressive state on a daily basis due to the ruler of my life. Who knew that something so infinitesimal could alter a person's life? At a younger age, there many things that happened to me that made me put a lock on my heart. Every time, failure in relationships or judgement came, I locked my heart to protect myself. Then, I found myself experimenting with various substances to kill the pain.

    At first, it felt great to be relieved from the pain. Weeks of use turned into months, months into years. My friends would ask, " Are you addicted"? "I can stop anytime", I would tell them. For once in my life, I did not have to lay down in my bed with agony on my heart. I was free!

    All of a sudden, my habit began
  2. jon

    jon Active Contributor

    I know that struggling with depression can be a tough thing. And the urge to handle that with drugs can be powerful. Try to fight It by staying positive.
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2015
  3. imperivm1

    imperivm1 Community Champion

    Yeah, well, that's what addicts think - that they've got it all under control. I don't know what it is, whether it's the chemistry or the nerves sending impulses to the brain, once your body starts craving drugs, you're done for. You'd have to be extremely strong-willed or inhumanely resistant to bodily urges and pain in order to be able to say, "I can stop any time". Sometimes dealing with addiction the hard way is better than relying on strong power of mind.
  4. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    Were you really free? That temporary freedom from pain and the pressures of life could well have been the beginning of a more dangerous enslavement to drugs or alcohol. I can't begin to imagine what your life was like or what it is at present, but I will encourage you to put up a fight for you.

    Take control of your destiny. Don't allow yourself to be controlled by failed relationships and judgement. Unlock your heart to the wonderful things life has to offer. I am confident that you can win the fight to reclaim your life for you and not continue to be a slave to any infinitesimal thing. You are bigger and better than any habit you have.

    No one ever said it would be easy, but the fight can be won.
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2015
  5. Profit5500

    Profit5500 Senior Contributor

    Do not give up that is all I have to say. It is hard but you just have to keep fighting. It is hard but I believe you can quit the addiction.
  6. scootpony

    scootpony Active Contributor

    When you feel like giving up, call on Jesus. I promise you he can give you the freedom that you crave. I can't, of course, prove that to you; but he can prove it for himself if you can find it in yourself to let him.

    So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. ~ John 8:36
  7. PrideKidd

    PrideKidd Active Contributor

    Please do not give up on yourself. You deserve better! I know first hand how hard overcoming addiction really is, but I promise you it is worth all the time and effort you put in. At first I just wanted to give in to make the cravings stop but soon learned that if you replace one addiction with another ( being healthy of course ) that can work too.

    When I quit I began exercising, and it really helped. From jogging to lifting weights helped settle those inner thoughts. What you choose to replace the drug habit with, make sure it is a healthy outlet. You will see results as soon as you really quit. The hardest part is convincing your brain you no longer want/need it to survive. That trick has taken me years to get down. But as I said finding healthy outlets can certainly be rewarding!

    Good Luck Friend!

    P.S. You can use this forum to help you stay clean, I know it has helped me out a lot, just having someone who has been there and can understand what you've been through. :)
    Winterybella and scootpony like this.
  8. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    Tough though it might be eventually the only way you'll free yourself from your pain is confronting your fears. I lived 4 years with no friends. Had only a few acquaintances who I saw maybe once or twice a week. It was hard for me but once I learned that I could find comfort in my own company the desire for acceptance, love, etc faded.

    If you can't trust people then at least learn to do without them. It's the better option than drugs.

    Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for.

    Dag Hammarskjold
    Winterybella likes this.
  9. scootpony

    scootpony Active Contributor

    From childhood, I've always been a fitness buff. Even through my years of alcohol and tobacco use I never failed to get my quota of physical exercise daily. Something I always wanted to be able to do, though, was run. I couldn't do that while doing those things.

    Actually, I couldn't do it before, either, as I always got that stitch in my side that people sometimes get after running just a little ways. But no more (the lord removed the stitch) and my daily run has become a very important part of my life.

    It provides another healthy place for introspection. I say "another" because there are many.
    At any rate, I think your suggestion is perfect for anyone, and especially for anyone who already has an interest in physical fitness or a sport to begin with.

    You can't remove a bad habit (or a good one!) and not replace it with something. If you fail to replace it, it will come back on you worse than when you removed it--either the same habit increased or a new one just as bad.

    You have to choose good before the bad chooses you.

    http://odb.org/2011/01/21/nature-abhors-a-vacuum/
  10. Matthodge1

    Matthodge1 Community Champion

    Often times, it feels extremely difficult to fight the feelings that you are currently feeling, but I know that if you stay strong and persevere through your turmoil that you will find the way to happiness.
  11. Matthodge1

    Matthodge1 Community Champion

    I'm not sure if the OP is a Christian, but I also fully support going to Jesus for help. He is the Great Healer, anyways, so if that does not sound promising, then I really do not know what does.
    scootpony likes this.
  12. scootpony

    scootpony Active Contributor

    I am not sure if he is a christian, either; but I am sure that God loves him regardless and that when we're feeling like we're at our worst there the lord is knocking at our inner doors and earnestly wanting to heal us. None of us were christian until we let him in.:)
  13. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    If you really want to quit, don't just say it in words, put it into action. Just don't give up on pursuing your goal to be clean. It's not easy, it's really tough, but you've got to make yourself stronger by trying to find ways to motivate yourself. Good luck with that.
  14. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    It is really hard and complicated to be very depressed.
    But I do not think that getting or trying substances can really solve the depression. It could just make the depression worse and cause more problems.
  15. xTinx

    xTinx Community Champion

    You know what they say, right? Drugs will never answer or solve your problems. You know all too well how taking drugs will affect you. I understand that you had depressive moments, but don't we all go through depression? It's comforting that you're not giving up on life despite what you've been through. You are meant for greater things, perhaps to contribute to the betterment of society or change people's lives. So please don't let drugs ruin your potential.
  16. PrideKidd

    PrideKidd Active Contributor

    Everyone's life matters, even if that includes the people we once did drugs with. The first step as hard as it is, is not realizing you have a problem because deep down you already know you do. No the first step is Asking for help followed very closely by detaching yourself from all the people and places you used to go, that really is step one & two in my book. Once I did both of those it was immensely easier to move on with my recovery. Again do not give up on yourself because when the sun rises tomorrow it is a new day. Take charge and make your life what you really want. ( without drugs ) You can do it, if I can! I promise! :)
  17. TommyVercetti

    TommyVercetti Community Champion

    Life is full of these slippery slopes- most of us have the figurative cuts and bruises to prove it, some of us have literal scars. The only way to survive them is to be strong mentally and to be informed. It also helps if you are loved. Borrowing from another person's strength is one of the most miraculous things on this earth. I hope you find your way.
  18. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I think depression, or the filling of voids (whether that be from feeling unloved as a child, not having a close network of people you can rely on, or things like that) is ultimately where drug dependence comes from. The only thing I can say is there are ways to fill the voids with positive 'addictions' rather than negative destructive behaviors.

    A healthy workout routine on a regular basis is an example of 'void filling' that to me is actually a positive (as long as you're not overdoing it) and it's one thing that has absolutely helped me.
    PrideKidd likes this.
  19. PrideKidd

    PrideKidd Active Contributor

    I am on board with the exercise and eating right (even though healthy food is so much more expensive) I can only do limited exercising but it doe not stop me from trying. I agree with filling the void with something positive, I had to in order to get clean.

    I used the money method. Anytime I got the craving real bad to snort a big fat rail I would put a dollar into an empty coffee can. At the end of the month I would tally up the money and go do something nice for myself such as a massage, a nice dinner, or a new outfit. Worked for me. ;)
  20. Johnsnow123

    Johnsnow123 Active Contributor

    I've been through the same thing. It's tough and my cure to it was finding happiness and being with people you trust and love. That will make you realize that there actually is more to life and you shouldn't give up now. Don't let these harmful substances take over you because there are other ways to fight depression. Keep fighting!

    "Do it now. Sometimes 'Later' becomes 'Never'."