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People can stop on their own

Discussion in 'Marijuana' started by primalclaws1974, Dec 3, 2014.

  1. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    It first struck me that you loved her even with her addiction and that speaks volumes. That you did not write her off because of her abuse of drugs must have affected her in the most positive way. You also mentioned that because you did not smoke she started to smoke less and then the baby was the final catalyst.

    It's the kind of great story you want to share with your kids. Your story demonstrates that in the right environment people can change. It doesn't always call for major intervention. I believe you intervened by being patient, and understanding and by just being there. I hope you all continue to thrive.
  2. Charli

    Charli Community Champion

    I believe this to be true as well. I'm just guessing that the few that don't might just be the extreme cases and some others just might have mental blocks that are too deep that they feel weak and unable to control their life on their own but at the end of the day it's all just in the mind.
  3. Teresa

    Teresa Senior Contributor

    I think the question of if you can control yourself if there is a good enough reason is why I am still angry with my ex and believe there is no hope of him recovering from his addiction, yet I can have hope for others that they can recover, I do think it all comes down to the addicted persons desire to stop using drugs, I didn't have to be a good enough reason but I feel like his son should have been.
  4. primalclaws1974

    primalclaws1974 Senior Contributor

    Thank you one and all for your remarks. I am not saying that professional help is completely unnecessary. Some people do have stronger willpower than others. You could look at it like this: she was never addicted to begin with, and it was just a lifestyle change. I really don't know, since it was weed, and not meth or heroin. It still took a lot effort on her part to change. She's never talked about it much, but she also made other life changes, including moving in with me in another town, 35 miles from her mom (she had never been on her own), and learning to drive and get her license. It was a lot to deal with all at once, but she did it. She paved the way for the birth of our son, and I am still proud of her to this day.
    notodrugs likes this.
  5. Mockingbird

    Mockingbird Member

    I would say that depends why a person is addicted. Someone told me once that all addiction is about pain, namely killing the pain that one feels inside. Depending why you have that pain to begin with goes a long way in determining the likelihood of kicking for good. Some people do okay till they are overwhelmed by stress, hurt or confused or just have a hard time coping. They can backslide, whether or not it becomes chronic all boils down to how well they have learned to cope with things. Love and support are huge, as is understanding and being able to communicate with each other on a real basis.
  6. Adrianna

    Adrianna Community Champion

    Wow that's something. I like your posts they are interesting. You stayed with someone who got so messed up daily. You also stayed long enough for her to get pregnant and were married. Amazing that she slowed down and cared enough to change.
    It's not always about changing people. It's about loving them. I think people can quit on their own without a ton of nagging or badgering. Ignorant people don't get the concept of live and let live. I'm kind of like you in a way. I never really minded guys doing drugs. It doesn't make sense to be this way, but it is much easier to be with someone if you don't get into it. I think if it really bothers someone that much and the other brings a plate out to do a line. Break it off or just avoid them. Saving the world is a big job. Especially when you do it one partner at a time. Go join a mission to stop drugs if you are so crazy to help people with this.
    Well, you must have tolerated a lot to get that far with her.
  7. bsthebenster

    bsthebenster Community Champion

    It depends on the person I suppose. It's hard to generalize the use of a drug from one person's experience. Sure, it's not physically addictive, but neither are cheeseburgers. Look how many overweight people there are trying desperately to stay away from their junk food of choice. I myself am able to stop smoking weed without issue - I'll go without it for months on end without thinking about it - but my girlfriend seems unable to.
  8. missbishi

    missbishi Community Champion

    I would say that both weed and cheeseburgers are psychological addictions. So if a person has enough willpower and is able to address the reasons behind their addiction then I'd say that it's perfectly possible to quit on your own. Having a concrete reason to quit (like pregnancy, for example) is also a great motivator.

    Drugs which cause physiological addictions are a diferent matter though. Quitting these on your own is downright dangerous and potentially lethal.
  9. morgoodie

    morgoodie Senior Contributor

    I believe it is totally possible that a person can quit on their own if they have the motivation to quit. I know I did. I think it depends upon the person and the support system they have. Congratulations to your wife on quitting and having the control to take it or leave it. It is quite an accomplishment and she should feel good about herself.
  10. Joethefirst

    Joethefirst Community Champion

    That's exactly it, sometimes we just need something bigger then ourselves to make a change. How often don't you hear people say that if it was for me I would carry on but I have to do it for my family. That can be a great motivation.
  11. SashaS

    SashaS Community Champion

    Anyone can stop anything, but there has to be influence. We all know that just saying " I will stop " won't help and you need to take a course of action because its easier said than done. If you can push a person to stop by giving them good enough reason to, they will. If somebody has no motives and no reason to quit, why would they? There has to be that drive, that motivation. I wish you all the best for your family.
  12. Davienna

    Davienna Community Champion

    It depends on the mental capacity of the addict and also the cause of their addiction. If the issue that triggered the addiction has not been resolved it will be a great challenge for the individual to quit. Also after the issues have been resolved the body may overpower the mind and it becomes very hard to quit. Withdrawal symptoms are more severe in some persons.
  13. healey

    healey Member

    For me, it's really a mixed method of getting away from friends, situations and triggers that feed the addiction. Being in a band, I was surrounded by it for years- and never had to pay for it. I was the literal definition of a burnout most of the time. My friends would always offer, and I must have had a weak will- because I'd always be interested. Then there was the music scene that basically lent itself to getting high. Everything felt better while high. From watching other's sets, setting up, afterparty, etc.

    However, now that I've gotten away from it for just a little while, I can kind of do some 'outside looking in' perspective, and see that it kind of held me back for a number of years- while still being able to socialize with the same friends.
  14. rz3300@

    rz3300@ Senior Contributor

    Just like anything else it really depends on the person and level of addiction. I am sure that we have all heard the classic "I can stop when I want" or have said it ourselves, which is the case for me, and we all know that it is probably not true. There are surely some people out there who can though, but they have something in them that I sure don't.
  15. Ones

    Ones Member

    It's all mental.You can't wake up one morning and say that you quit smoking Marijuana.It was her decision to reduce the intensity of smoking and therefore she did.Good for her
  16. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    Yes, people can really stop on their own if they wanted to and if they have discipline and self-control, especially marijuana, since it's not really addictive in the first place. Kudos to you and your wife for bringing up your child in a drug-free environment, and I hope your wife never smokes a single joint ever again.
  17. Tremmie

    Tremmie Community Champion

    Marijuana is not physically addictive, it's more a psychological addiction. I'm glad the wife of the OP quit, I guess her priorities changed and that is great. Good for her and her husband, some people have the hardest time beating those ugly habits, but when they find something good they fight for it. Kudos to her, I admire anyone who does that.
  18. djolem

    djolem Senior Contributor

    I have been telling this all around this forum and it can sound like some kind of lobbying but I really believe that quitting marijuana is very easy even if you are a heavy user, meaning, several times a day. I haven't smoked for more than two years but I do not want to say I quit because...Why would I want to quit something so nice. It is soothing to my general state of mind. However, currently I haven't felt any need to smoke and it is lasting for, as I said, more than two years.
  19. ejorman1010

    ejorman1010 Senior Contributor

    You definitely can stop on your own. I have gone weeks without doing it without a problem. Marijuana is not nearly as physically addicting as other drugs.
  20. explorerx7

    explorerx7 Senior Contributor

    Weed is not as addictive as many people would love to have us believe. It may be easier to quit the weed habit than many of the other drugs. I have seen many people totally quit or quit and return to the stuff at will. However, some people sometimes find it very difficult to get out of a habit and it may take a bit of willpower for them to prevail. I have come to the conclusion that a habit can be just as problematic as an addiction. Therefore, it's commendable that out of the consideration for the preservation of the well-being of her child and her relationship was able to gather the willpower to ease herself out of the habit.