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Pin Pals?

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by AnDaughtery, Nov 20, 2015.

  1. AnDaughtery

    AnDaughtery Member

    I'm really just curious as to if there are any pin-pal situations for people trying to get clean and do you think it works? Maybe writing to someone who is anonymous but is obviously interested in your well being and helping would help motivate or help in general? are there things out there like this? I would love to help or just lend an ear to listen!
  2. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    I think having someone to "talk to" someone who can encourage you to keep fighting even when you feel like giving up can help. I suppose that a forum like this would be a great place to find someone who can be your penpal. You could write PMs to each other or if you get their email address you could "chat" via email.
  3. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    I don't see why that can't work but that's one of the reasons this forum works so well as its a place for people to come and and discuss topics such as drug abuse but at the same time be anonymous.
  4. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I am sure it could work but I guess these days it's a concern about giving things out like an address or so forth to be penpals with someone. I think nowadays people are a lot more wary about giving stuff like that out, especially with things like google maps just being able to track down someone's house and so forth!

    I think maybe an email penpal program would be better, but I agree with @pwarbi that coming here is also a useful outlet for people. I find that myself, here I have a lot of people that have been in the same boat before, and also lots of people willing to lend an ear and listen to anything I'm struggling with - so it's therapeutic in that sense.
  5. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    Penpals can work, but don't you think that forums like these are the most ideal solution if you want to connect to like minded people? The response is faster too as compared to waiting on a snail mail.
  6. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Of course, this can definitely work, specially for those people who are struggling in recovery. They would sometimes feel lonely, isolated, and depressed during this period, and having someone to talk to, listen to their stories, and give them words of support, could somehow make them feel motivated to keep on going.
  7. AnDaughtery

    AnDaughtery Member

    I completely understand when you talk about the forum, I really should have said what I meant re-reading what I posted I realize I left out mainly for those who don't have Internet access? Kind of like a referral system of sorts? I agree email and such would be better for privacy I guess I dint think of all the scary people out there now days. Such great feedback thanks everyone!
    pwarbi likes this.
  8. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    The forum in many ways IS a kind of public version of the system and people can come here and talk about their problems aswell as find solutions.

    There's a lot of people that rely on this form of communication and long may that continue. In an ideal world I'm sure we'd all rather it wasn't necessary but while it is, its good to have a place like we have here.
  9. LinB

    LinB Senior Contributor

    You do not find very often, people who just love you or care for you without even knowing you much. To be in the company of such a person would be a remarkable experience.
  10. LinB

    LinB Senior Contributor

    We were all made to communicate. Communication is the means by which we get things done and all problems are solved. When there is no communication there is only frustration and therefore it pays to have a situation where an addict is able to express themselves to someone else.
  11. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    Agree that forum like this can give such feeling of being understood and cared for. Even we really do not know the identity of the posters, we can still be motivated. Good way to also express our own thoughts and share feelings.
  12. Rosyrain

    Rosyrain Community Champion

    Pin-pals are great because they are not judge like friends and family can be. I have a Pin-pals that I have only met once and that was like 13 years ago. We still talk a lot to this day and have been good friends ever since. We do not judge each other and the conversation is always pleasant.
    AnDaughtery likes this.
  13. Tremmie

    Tremmie Community Champion

    Well, there is a site where you can find someone to talk to, but more like a person who can listen to you. They are not supposed to give any kind of advice, unless you really ask them to. The name is 7 cups of tea, it's a nice site, but I'd not recommend it to someone who is going through a really bad crisis... most of the people there don't know how to handle such... they are just volunteers that have received a very superficial training to be good listeners.
  14. MyDigitalpoint

    MyDigitalpoint Community Champion

    Penpals are still an option for people who really want to start an everlasting friendship with someone to whom he or she will be exchanging snail mail, what means devotion to write down a letter, time to take it to the post office, and patience to way for the reply.

    When the penpal you are writing correspond to you doing the same, is a great experience, but in today's world, you may find that people is in a rush. I would put into doubt a persona that wanting to be my friend doesn't want to do that little effort to send me a letter the traditional way, so the experience may also be discouraging if people you write to don't reply.

    However, and in your case, you need that contact to get some help and express yourself, thing that you can do much better emailing someone, posting in forums like this, or sending a private message.
  15. Coolkidhere

    Coolkidhere Community Champion

    I think having a pen-pal is a great way to have support. Having that someone, whom you can be honest and truthful about your feelings and experiences is a great outlet. It enables the person to let out his or her emotions and be able to release pent-up feelings. The thing is, talking to someone in person can be quite scary, even if you've known that person your whole life. But with a stranger, an anonymous person, you are able to let go of your inhibitions and fears. And maybe, just maybe, that's the stepping stone for you to recover fully.

    Forums like this, I think are almost like being pen-pals with anonymous people. You get to tell them your thoughts and experiences and no one's going to judge you here. That's the good thing about it. So I love spending my time here and sharing my thoughts as well because people are going through what I'm going through and what my family is going through. It's much, much nicer to talk to people who have the same experiences as me.
  16. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    If the person has the same experience as you or not sometimes doesn't even matter and it's just the fact that you can talk to somebody that's not involved in your situation or is too close to you.

    Sometimes an outsider that listens and gives you their opinion can be all it takes for a person to see something from a different angle and perspective.
  17. PingPongCall

    PingPongCall Active Contributor

    This would be a great idea. I think something like this could really work well for a lot of people.
  18. anorexorcist

    anorexorcist Community Champion

    I think that human support is one of the biggest motivations for people in recovery, especially with someone who is/was dealing with the same situation, it might be a great and healthy way of encouragement and motivation.
  19. doatk22

    doatk22 Community Champion

    I think that's a good idea! You can meet some awesome people that way too! Sometimes the people you least expect, can be the most encouraging people in your life.
  20. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    I have had pen pals over the years who have helped me through some difficult times. It is nice to be able to talk somebody who is not involved it the situation. Some of the best friends I have and have today are people that I have never met in person.