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Saying sorry to the people you hurt!

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by 003, Feb 4, 2015.

  1. 003

    003 Community Champion

    It's inevitable that we hurt people for some reason. There are those you wouldn't apologize to, but there are also those who are worthy of it because they are important to you and when you hurt them, you also hurt yourself. And so, for those people, you try to settle things and bring back the good old times. But how are going to do it? I really want to make it especial, but actions outweighs any aesthetics. And actions alone could achieve results and maintain them. So what I do is that I simply try to apologize and say how deeply I regret that I've hurt him. I wouldn't promise anything, but I'll strive to be a good man that I was.
    RingoBerry likes this.
  2. elles-belles

    elles-belles Community Champion

    Apologizing is always good both for you but especially for the one you hurt because honestly nothing beats knowing that the person who hurt you regrets it and wish they hadn't put you through that particular thing!
    I also think that hurting someone is easy but one needs to try and steer away from doing it often more so because, as much as apologizing helps it gets tired when you go back and hurt the person again! This is where putting yourself in the other persons shoes comes to play.
  3. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    The mere fact that we have to say we're sorry is an admittance of wrong doing and that itself calls for a lot of humility.

    Sorry is a very powerful word that sends particular signal to the brain. It is not a word to be used likely. Some believe it's a word that has been diluted and overuse. I read somewhere that we need to give the word back it's power ans say it only when we mean it.

    Once we have said it, we demonstrate how sincere we are by working towards correcting whatever mistakes we have made. There is where I believe the word's power is really regained ; by our actions.
  4. RingoBerry

    RingoBerry Senior Contributor

    Well said mate, well said.
  5. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    For other people saying "I am sorry" to someone they had hurt the feelings, put into pain and had done something wrong and misunderstanding is not that easy. Whatever are the reasons.. giving or accepting the word "sorry" will depends on the acceptance itself and how they meant it not by just saying the words but with pure intention within their hearts. I always apologize if I had done something even on the smallest things and if someone apologize to me I always accept it because for me I want to live my life without bitterness here in my mind and heart.
  6. Lizel

    Lizel Community Champion

    It is surely very important to apologize the people you have hurted by your words or actions,
    but from my experience it's way harder to forgive especially when the person that has
    hurted you meant a lot to you, really a lot.
  7. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    Most people are afraid of apologizing when they've done something wrong because they think the person they wronged might not forgive them. However since you are the wrong-doer you must be the one to make the first move. Say sorry, and it's off your chest. If the other person isn't willing to forgive you just yet, you'd have done your part anyway. Now wait for "time to heal all wounds."
  8. sazzydan

    sazzydan Active Contributor

    Saying sorry is a good way of showing that you understand you have done something wrong and are trying to make up for it, but a lot of the time, the people you have hurt will understand that you are going through a really bad time in your life and did not at all mean to hurt them at all.

    Its hard not to burn bridges when you are struggling to get through anyway and I understand all to well that it is hard to rebuild after it is done, but all you can do is apologize and try to do something nice for the person. In many ways a card always helps, get a card saying that you are sorry and explain to the person what it is you did wrong and how you are going to try and fix it. I think its meaningful and gives them something to think about. I have found in the past this is a great way of saying your sorry.

    I hope this helps!
  9. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Apologizing and saying sorry to the people you have hurt along the way is not a sign of weakness, instead it's a sign of bravery, like admitting to yourself that you have made a mistake, and would have to do something to patch things up with other people.
    TommyVercetti likes this.
  10. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    Saying sorry is such a noble and humble act, it just shows that the person made the first step to reach out and restore peace instead of letting things that way they are. Watch out for insincere apologies though, since I have had my share of them. Don't always take things at face value, since some people can be so fake.
  11. TommyVercetti

    TommyVercetti Community Champion

    I agree, apologizing is very brave. It really shows your character and it shows the person that you care about your relationship with them. I need to point out that the act of apologizing isn't necessary complete by itself. It's always followed by contrition or making amends. It needs to be sincere and true, and it needs to convey a desire to compromise and get along.
  12. Charli

    Charli Community Champion

    I think for most people who genuinely care about you, just seeing you doing well would be good enough as an apology. I agree that it's best to express it as best as possible since it not only gives the recipient some much needed comfort after the hurt that was caused, but on a personal level it also does well for clearing the conscience.
  13. wahmed

    wahmed Active Contributor

    Saying sorry is one of the hardest things when you mean it. We often say sorry to perfect strangers but when we know we are wrong and something has gone excessively wrong then it is very painful. It is however the best way to let go of a load and feel instantly lighter
  14. imperivm1

    imperivm1 Community Champion

    Apologies can really be our ticket out of a bad situation. If the people we want to say sorry to are understanding, then it's all fine and dandy. If they aren't, then they should be the one to blame since they're human too and it should be taken for granted that they made mistakes at some point in their lives as well. There's the other side of the coin, nonetheless. If you screw up one too many times, your apologies start to lose value. It's no longer a matter of human compassion but a test of one's good will and patience. We shouldn't ever abuse the power of "sorry".
  15. E.Mil

    E.Mil Community Champion

    Saying sorry can begin to heal wounds in others and yourself. Sometimes just hearing those words especially when they come from the heart can mean so much.
  16. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    All of us are not perfect and we always make mistakes and hurt other people. But despite that if we are sincere in our thoughts and actions we can always ask for an apology or say sorry for hurting their feelings. Sometimes it is not our intention to hurt someone but it just happened in the wrong situation of time. All of us must take the responsibility of our actions. And we should always bear in mind that if someone is saying sorry to us we should learn how to forgive in order for us to have peace of mind.
  17. xTinx

    xTinx Community Champion

    Sorry is the hardest word to say. I do believe that if people let go of their pride, if they admit their faults, it won't be that hard to say this five letter word. You don't have to be the primary perpetrator. If you've somehow contributed to the hurt even through inaction, all it takes to slowly heal someone's wound is "sorry." It also pays to forgive yourself. That way, you'd be able to bounce back from past mistakes and learn from them.
  18. Clairelouise84

    Clairelouise84 Senior Contributor

    it's very brave and classy of you to apologize it's not easy to say you're sorry for the things you have done wrong but that is a step in the right direction and you can begin building bridges with the people that you care about. i really hope that you get the results that you want and people beginning to see the real you again.