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Secret Cocaine and Not So Secret Use

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by amolt001, Nov 2, 2018.

  1. amolt001

    amolt001 Member

    My story starts before I was even aware what was going on. My boyfriend has been using cocaine for about a year and struggles with it. It has taken me a lot of time to gather the information on what to look for in his behavior and how to spot his high. He has gone into absolute rages at me, pleaded with me to stay with him, promised he would never do it again, but ultimately does.

    I gave him the final ultimatum a few weeks ago, and he is dead pan that he will never touch it again. I am scare because when he is on something, it is not easy to tell. I know him deeply, so it's easy for me to spot (now) but he is smart...I am worried that he is finding other ways to use that aren't as noticeable (no one has allergies and runny noses so intermittently.

    Lately he has had a racing heart beat, seems paranoid and anxiety-ridden and also doesn't eat much (even though he loves to eat). I have no idea what to do. I don't want to be constantly checking in on him as he doesn't like feeling like I am untrusting and always checking in. Does anyone have any advice on what to look out for?
  2. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @amolt001... Welcome to the community. I'm sorry to hear about your boyfriend and the issues you're having with him. Loving someone who struggles with an addiction is certainly not easy.

    This article might help you:

    What Are the Signs of Cocaine Abuse?

    We are here to offer up help, support, and a listening ear. If you ever feel like reaching out and leaning on us, please don't hesitate. You are not alone.

    Also, please consider checking out a Nar-Anon or Al-Anon meeting in your area. They are meetings for loved ones who are struggling with addiction and they are very helpful and comforting. Being around others who know exactly what you're feeling/going through is a good thing. You will realize that you are not alone.

    Please take good care of yourself. I will pray for you and your boyfriend.
    True concern and Dominica like this.
  3. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @amolt001 hey there! welcome to the forum. i'm sorry you're bf is struggling... i know that isn't easy on you for sure.

    dean has given some great advice. i agree that you attending a support group might help. it can be less challenging when you can talk about things with others face-to-face.

    and of course, we are always here too.
    deanokat likes this.
  4. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    I will respond further in the morning as my own life is very scary and nerve wrecking right now,but I think to answer your question...I think you are already looking out for the thing's I would suggest you watch for.Stay Strong my friend and God Bless you
    deanokat and Dominica like this.