I would not really worry that much if my current medication regimen was not volatile. If I do not have 1 of a certain medication it would cause drastic amounts of both physical and psychological discomfort. Availability as far as getting a regular doctor and also paying for a doctor is very difficult. I would be otherwise perfectly fine if I did not have to worry or think about the future prospect and unpredictable patterns of having this symptom that feels like a radiating beam of negativity destroy my life from the inside out. I am waiting for it to end honestly. I have scoured the internet and to this day I have never had any problems psychologically as far as being able to not have any brains inside my head. I have no real anxieties or worries I just hope certain things happen. I might have a few irrational expectations but as far as what I have researched with other people and have read in the past. Usually a person can return to a very normal and manageable state as long as they remain healthy. I have enough things in my life that put me at a disadvantage. Otherwise I would be perfectly fine. I do not feel persecuted I I’m fact feel like I have had enough of this horrible hell on earth. What I do know is that I myself and my consciousness will avoid things that remind me of anything remotely tormenting or uncomfortable. If I could make a list or would probably be about 1 mile long. Certainly after so much time there is a point when a person just really does not care enough to dwell or think about past trauma. I really am not that traumatized and can function perfectly fine. But in my current state it is almost like there is a loud speaker next to my ear from time to time that spits non sense.