An American Addiction Centers Resource

New to the DrugAbuse.com Forums?Join or

Sober Meth Addict Hearing Voices

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by EndorsesJeans, Feb 24, 2020.

  1. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

  2. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

  3. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    I think I might watch some rape porn , deal drugs , and torture a few animals. On top of that I will steal stuff from people , attack others in violence and then masticante to pictures of women who are 90 years old.
  4. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    So I have a very detailed and sinister plan to make someone snap and resort to violence.

    Next to me they wrong me or show a sign of disrespect I am going to be so calm and so happy. Approaching my victim and very calmly talking to them and putting the best grin : smile on my face. Instead of being sincere and mature I will use words as if I am talking to a toddler or someone that is slow. If they have a reaction that is negative then I will say “”It’s ok, Calm down we all know your having a difficult time””. Then I will probably get the exact reaction I was looking for. But I will not


    Instead .. and I have never once gone into detail about thinking about this at all or planning it out. I would prefer to work with a dip stick who I can put perform opposed to someone who is able bodied and willing to do as more or as much as I can.

    So I have gone through all of this already. It’s done
  5. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    I think I might watch some rape porn , deal drugs , and torture a few animals. On top of that I will steal stuff .

    Maybe rape a few choir boys from a catholic basement.
  6. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    The Government/ Military has been using weapons against me for years on end without relenting. Normally I would be a happy, healthy, polite and also a very responsible / logical person. Aside from my drug use which was crippling I had no problems at all until this started to wreck havoc on my brain. It shaded my reality and I remember trying to do certain activities feeling shitty and being at hone feeling relatively fine. I did normal thing bad and enjoyed a few activities that most people would turn a blind eye to out of interest.

    I had a brief period of meth use and I also never sold the drug to anyone do that is off the table. While I frequently discussed the sale of drugs with my drug using peers I did not participate in it unless I was sharing it with 3 or more people including myself. I have even flushed illegal substances down the toilet for 1 dile purpose and also a good reason. They where bad and I had self control.

    I have been trying to enjoy life and these sick tormented have brains that are set and zeroed in on just a few primitive areas in life. It’s main purpose is to harm , inflict severe amounts of pain until bleeding , blindness and also a few colapses on the floor. No benefit to anyone and certainly not humane or constitutional when it comes to what the USA actually stands for. I do not have to try to not break laws or rules I just go about my business. I also do not have to try to maintain my sanity or have a brain that is healthy and capable it just happens naturally without any thoughts at all. Now it is working me over in a new way where I am starting to have not only trauma that I have hysterically mentioned in the past but also head trauma and problems with my nervous system. People mention it and point it out almost every single day of the week.

    Unlike nearly all psychological illnesses that just do not abruptly start I have been talking and in communication with multiple doctors and have a current medicine regimen which would cure or alleviate a large majority of symptoms in terms of patient / population percentages. This includes sleep ! Where heavy sedatives and tranquilizers have little to no effect. This is human torture and it is one step closer to human genocide.


    I want this to stop and out of all the people I al not stupid enough to believe some of the bull shot it spews. It collects data and information to be used against me I. A tormenting way but the only problem is.. What about my life is so horrible and tormenting when I have 30 plus years of sobriety.

    I have never participated in any sexually deviant behaviors. I have also never made anything that would imprisonments me or put others in danger. They have zero evidence to support such a violent and deviant act such as human torture for years and year on end without even relenting.

    I am not altering my lifestyle at all and I am also not avoiding anything. It would make anyone crazy insane because it makes people avoid personal contact with people and avoid any forms of intimacy with anyone on any level. Life is not about sex you sick fucks !

    Leave me alone.. Go bother someone who actually needs it. I chose to not participate in your life killing game of death and torment.

    I am still kind of ok right now but as things go on. It will drastically reduce my health, my personality and also take everything away from me. These people are disgusting and have seemingly taken communications out of context. Since I was not a criminal I had to just start talking like a person whom I was acclimated to being around. I was never aware of it it just came out in the form of something that might seem sinister. I have been working on it though. You can not punish a person for having done thing that comes out if their mouths in the form of communication. What is the problem now with me ? Nothing !
    Is it my problem ? Nope .. Am I worried ? Not even slightly . All I am doing is living and trying to have a nice normal life. They will have to work and spend allot of money to try to torture me. With Pain , blood , sweat , tears I have gone through this.

    They might have issues but I hold little resentments : what I type is not a direct reflection of how I might think or act .
    Davers likes this.
  7. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    Leave me alone ! All together. My whole ducking head, eyes , ears hurt and you still torment. You make me scrape and hit them in my sleep . Why ?
  8. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    Leave me alone ! All together. My whole ducking head, eyes , ears hurt and you still torment. You make me scrape and hit them in my sleep . Why ? Plus not allowing me to take a bowel movement without interference. It’s very uncomfortable and has caused bleeding . Maybe I am very sensitive and find it not only unpleasant but severely painful as well. It causes swelling and stress. It will eventually cause ulcers , head aches , hear problems , and other un healthy things . Evil people
  9. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    Leave me alone ! All together. My whole ducking head, eyes , ears hurt and you still torment. You make me scrape and hit them in my sleep . Why ? Plus not allowing me to take a bowel movement without interference. It’s very uncomfortable and has caused bleeding . Maybe I am very sensitive and find it not only unpleasant but severely painful as well. It causes swelling and stress. It will eventually cause ulcers , head aches , hear problems , and other un healthy things . Evil people


    With the deterioration of mental health they cause multiple symptoms of physical health deterioration. It could be psychological or real but non the less it exists very real for the persons involved ,
  10. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    Leave me alone ! All together. My whole ducking head, eyes , ears hurt and you still torment. You make me scrape and hit them in my sleep . Why ? Plus not allowing me to take a bowel movement without interference. It’s very uncomfortable and has caused bleeding . Maybe I am very sensitive and find it not only unpleasant but severely painful as well. It causes swelling and stress. It will eventually cause ulcers , head aches , hear problems , and other un healthy things . Evil people


    With the deterioration of mental health they cause multiple symptoms of physical health deterioration. It could be psychological or real but non the less it exists very real for the persons involved ,

    You are acting very careless and decking havoc on people’s lives that are peaceful and kind. It serves no one

    STOP HARASSING ME FOR LEASE.

    thank you
  11. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    Leave me alone ! All together. My whole ducking head, eyes , ears hurt and you still torment. You make me scrape and hit them in my sleep . Why ? Plus not allowing me to take a bowel movement without interference. It’s very uncomfortable and has caused bleeding . Maybe I am very sensitive and find it not only unpleasant but severely painful as well. It causes swelling and stress. It will eventually cause ulcers , head aches , hear problems , and other
  12. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    suck Paul’s dick suck hid dick sick his sick right now.
  13. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    suck Paul’s dick suck hid dick sick his sick right now.

    It’s stupid because this is just taunting me and it will end up changing my personality as far as my moods and also the language I use. I normally keep both my thoughts , language and mind wholesome . Aside from a porno flick that lasts a few minutes and leaves no impression
  14. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    I prefer to have a very stable mind and attitude . From the time I wake up until bedtime I am aware of the my position. In prison I would wake up with Red clouded eyes but it was probably because of the .


    Trying to work please stop. Also be nice
  15. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    I prefer to have a very stable mind and attitude . From the time I wake up until bedtime I am aware of the my position. In prison I would wake up with Red clouded eyes but it was probably because of the .


    Trying to work please stop. Also be nice

    Why would Dave jerk off in my mouth ? It’s sick ?
  16. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    I prefer to have a very stable mind and attitude . From the time I wake up until bedtime I am aware of the my position. In prison I would wake up with Red clouded eyes but it was probably because of the .


    Trying to work please stop. Also be nice

    Why would Dave jerk off in my mouth ? It’s sick ? Don’t care end of thought
  17. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    I prefer to have a very stable mind and attitude . From the time I wake up until bedtime I am aware of the my position. In prison I would wake up with Red clouded eyes but it was probably because of the .


    Trying to work please stop. Also be nice

    Why would Dave jerk off in my mouth ? It’s sick ? Don’t care end of thought



    Yes I am trying to add humor to this dialogue but it needs to end right away because it is effecting my job prospects and my physical health in such a way that my mental health would of been slightly deteriorating.

    All of this garbage my brain is starting to react to in a way that is automatic . “ he is a meth user”. Response “He is probably not that bad just wish him well”. Voice “. She is not suppose to be back here Dave was pissed”. Response “” I do not care that much what is the big deal.

    It’s getting old and it often is scary and very very scary to think my brain could be like this for the rest of my life. No one deserves such treatment.

    I want peace and I am going to refrain from responding to this in such a way that pulls me away from reality .

    Strange things happen like people clap or yell and a electrical zap will surge through my system and it almost hurts.

    Meth use was the worst choice of my life and all I am trying to do is overcome it. There is nothing more or nothing less than that simple saying of “. I am trying to live in peace and I am trying to be healthy and not repeat past mistakes . And I am not repeating them.
  18. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    I prefer to have a very stable mind and attitude . From the time I wake up until bedtime I am aware of the my position. In prison I would wake up with Red clouded eyes but it was probably because of the .


    Trying to work please stop. Also be nice

    Why would Dave jerk off in my mouth ? It’s sick ? Don’t care end of thought



    Yes I am trying to add humor to this dialogue but it needs to end right away because it is effecting my job prospects and my physical health in such a way that my mental health would of been slightly deteriorating.

    All of this garbage my brain is starting to react to in a way that is automatic . “ he is a meth user”. Response “He is probably not that bad just wish him well”. Voice “. She is not suppose to be back here Dave was pissed”. Response “” I do not care that much what is the big deal.

    It’s getting old and it often is scary and very very scary to think my brain could be like this for the rest of my life. No one deserves such treatment.

    I want peace and I am going to refrain from responding to this in such a way that pulls me away from reality .

    Strange things happen like people clap or yell and a electrical zap will surge through my system and it almost hurts.

    Meth use was the worst choice of my life and all I am trying to do is overcome it. There is nothing more or nothing less than that simple saying of “. I am trying to live in peace and I am trying to be healthy and not repeat past mistakes . And I am not repeating them.

    If anything this will make me more resilient to certain things and be a constant reminder . I do not need it but I want to have peace more than anything in the entire world .

    Well, A billion dollars and a yacht with a swimming pool that has a bison inside of it would be cool.
  19. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    Drinking water brings so much clarity and relieves so much physical pain that about one quart is equal to a good amount of both pain and anxiety medications. It happened very quickly and I had a 85 percent reduction in my muscular pain. It’s stupid and wreckless to be distracted . I crave and desire reality and it’s harder to hang onto all of those delusional thoughts than it is to just let go.


    I dislike hearing stupid **** that I cannot control but have been through it enough to certainly expect a problem in the future.

    But I have gotten this far.
  20. EndorsesJeans

    EndorsesJeans Community Champion

    Drinking water brings so much clarity and relieves so much physical pain that about one quart is equal to a good amount of both pain and anxiety medications. It happened very quickly and I had a 85 percent reduction in my muscular pain. It’s stupid and wreckless to be distracted . I crave and desire reality and it’s harder to hang onto all of those delusional thoughts than it is to just let go.


    I dislike hearing stupid **** that I cannot control but have been through it enough to certainly expect a problem in the future.

    But I have gotten this far.

    So as I roll over to experience a bad episode I plan to go to sleep. I will be reappearing positive affirmations so loud it will drown this out. I will do this until I lose consciousness.


    Good night